Maybe it is just me ...........
Meghan0116
Posts: 1,263 Member
But, I don't really miss the relationship part of relationships but man, I do miss the intimacy. I am not ashamed and will get my needs met when they arise but I would prefer one steady person. Hmmmmmm. How can I find one of those? lol
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I wish I could get my needs met when they arise!!!
I feel like I'll be NOT doing it for a long time!! :sad:0 -
Okay, that sounded way worse that it is. lmao But I guess my point was that I don't mind the casual every once in a while. I guess I am guy-like in that way.0
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No, I understand.. just wish I could do that but I can't.
It'd make things soooo much easier for sure. And for me physical intimacy comes with the other stuff.. it's a whole package that I want.. I don't know how I turned into such a prude about sex within a relationship but apparently that's where I'm at.0 -
That is definitely how I used to be. I equated sex with love. Then I became single after 8 years and somehow that changed. Would I prefer to have deep feelings for the person I am having sex with? Absolutely. But every once in a blue moon, I am okay with letting feelings take the back burner.
Great, now I feel like I sound like a slut.0 -
Great, now I feel like I sound like a slut.
Great, now I feel like I sound like a prude needy woman!! lol0 -
Okay, let's go with this.
I am not a slut (haven't actually been with that many people and only go out once a month)
You are not a prude (your feelings are important to you and for intimacy to be meaningful there should be feelings)
Does this work?0 -
yes!!
:drinker:0 -
Hmmm, no one is commenting on my thread. I guess I do come across slutty. Hmph! lol0
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Hmmm, no one is commenting on my thread. I guess I do come across slutty. Hmph! lol
I wish I had that mind set like you. I get attached. But aren't we all slutty in the bedroom... at least you should be! LOL0 -
See.. I'm not a prude at all in the bedroom (gotta love the latin passion) but like you said, I get attached as well.. so it's best if I'm attached first then start the bang fest or else...0
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Yep, see that's the thing, most people would tend to be OK for casual sex in the beginning, but then over time, as you start to see each other more, often one of the 2 would just want more than just casual.
So you need to be able to end it too...0 -
*bang fest* lmao0
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Yep, see that's the thing, most people would tend to be OK for casual sex in the beginning, but then over time, as you start to see each other more, often one of the 2 would just want more than just casual.
So you need to be able to end it too...
see, this is the problem I have with the whole FWB..
if you're my friend (and to be my friend it means your nice, loyal, trustworthy, etc) AND on top of that I want to sleep with you (meaning I'm physically attracted to you), why wouldn't I want MORE? I'd fail.. totally.0 -
Yep, see that's the thing, most people would tend to be OK for casual sex in the beginning, but then over time, as you start to see each other more, often one of the 2 would just want more than just casual.
So you need to be able to end it too...
see, this is the problem I have with the whole FWB..
if you're my friend (and to be my friend it means your nice, loyal, trustworthy, etc) AND on top of that I want to sleep with you (meaning I'm physically attracted to you), why wouldn't I want MORE? I'd fail.. totally.
Man, when you put it that way. Hmmmmm.0 -
LOL ok so I totally understand where the OP is coming from. I actually have 2 guys who are FWB and nothing more. I think I might be relationship burnt out . I'm 31 and basiacally have been in a relationship for 11 year straight (there was a six month break between my ex husband and ex-boyfriend) . And as for developing feeling from this One of the guys and I have been at this for about 4 months and nothing else in our friendship has changed lol. My friend told me this once and I think it helped open my eyes.====== SLUT- A women with the morals of a man.... (no offense guys) Women are the ones who judge women not men..... I'm pretty happy with the way everything is right now lol:bigsmile:0
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How in the world did you find 2 FWB? lol0
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How in the world did you find 2 FWB? lol
I have alot of male friends lol:blushing: ......... Actually one is the older brother of my male best friend and the other was introduced to me by another male friend....My life is kinda fun right now :bigsmile:0 -
Yep, see that's the thing, most people would tend to be OK for casual sex in the beginning, but then over time, as you start to see each other more, often one of the 2 would just want more than just casual.
So you need to be able to end it too...
see, this is the problem I have with the whole FWB..
if you're my friend (and to be my friend it means your nice, loyal, trustworthy, etc) AND on top of that I want to sleep with you (meaning I'm physically attracted to you), why wouldn't I want MORE? I'd fail.. totally.
I cant do the FWB either...for the exact same reasons you stated! Plus I'm looking for a real relationship at this point in my life.
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Yep, see that's the thing, most people would tend to be OK for casual sex in the beginning, but then over time, as you start to see each other more, often one of the 2 would just want more than just casual.
So you need to be able to end it too...
see, this is the problem I have with the whole FWB..
if you're my friend (and to be my friend it means your nice, loyal, trustworthy, etc) AND on top of that I want to sleep with you (meaning I'm physically attracted to you), why wouldn't I want MORE? I'd fail.. totally.
Ok so here is how its works with my 2 FWB so that emotional attachments havent been formed lol......
The first guy has been my friend for years adn while we have great arragement neither of us would be happy dating the other. As much fun as we have hanging out and well bedroom stuff. Neither of us would be compatible in a relationship.Both of us are aware of this fact and are pretty happy with the current arragement.
Guy number 2 is a new "friend" who knew going into everything that I wouldn't want to date him. Dont get me wrong great body and a fun guy but way to much drama going on in his life for me to deal with...... So we just meet up at the bar usually and depending on who else may be there with us we go home together....
*ALWAYS WEAR PROTECTION*
P.S. I would love to find a guy that I would be willing to try having a relationship with but right now I just ahvent found the right one........... And both guys know this is not a permanent thing lol0 -
Yep, see that's the thing, most people would tend to be OK for casual sex in the beginning, but then over time, as you start to see each other more, often one of the 2 would just want more than just casual.
So you need to be able to end it too...
see, this is the problem I have with the whole FWB..
if you're my friend (and to be my friend it means your nice, loyal, trustworthy, etc) AND on top of that I want to sleep with you (meaning I'm physically attracted to you), why wouldn't I want MORE? I'd fail.. totally.
I'm with you on this. I can not do the whole FWB thing either. If you are my friend, and I want to give that part of myself to you, than I want something more than just a casual relationship. I can't just have sex to fulfill a need, its emotional and bonding to me. If I need to fulfill a need, I will just do it myself. Just saying!0 -
Great, now I feel like I sound like a slut.
No, you sound normal. And I suspect you will get a lot more "friends" from this board than I will, since I've pretty much blown my cover on this issue, lol.0 -
see, this is the problem I have with the whole FWB..
if you're my friend (and to be my friend it means your nice, loyal, trustworthy, etc) AND on top of that I want to sleep with you (meaning I'm physically attracted to you), why wouldn't I want MORE? I'd fail.. totally.
Religious views aside, you gotta know what works for you. It's hard enough for me to even kiss someone real good without getting emotionally attached. No way I could do FWB. I'm cool with that. And the right guy will be cool with it too.0 -
see, this is the problem I have with the whole FWB..
if you're my friend (and to be my friend it means your nice, loyal, trustworthy, etc) AND on top of that I want to sleep with you (meaning I'm physically attracted to you), why wouldn't I want MORE? I'd fail.. totally.
Religious views aside, you gotta know what works for you. It's hard enough for me to even kiss someone real good without getting emotionally attached. No way I could do FWB. I'm cool with that. And the right guy will be cool with it too.
I'm beginning to wonder if such a guy exists!!! lol0 -
Hmmm, no one is commenting on my thread. I guess I do come across slutty. Hmph! lol
negative....you do not come across as a slut.0 -
Our society has set definitions over time. is it considered being a "slut" just because a woman has needs but isnt in a committed relationship? is it considered being a "guy" just because a man has needs and isnt in a committed relationship? consider both are masked definitions created by a society of cynical and judgemental people. consider needs and desires are apart of being human regardless of gender.
moreover, is a man or woman a "prude" just becuase they desire connectedness to accompany the physical desires? consider, again, these are attributes of a human.
all things have been masked by "our" meanings over time due to our experienced past. what would happen if we cleared the future of our pasts and lived in the moment of today creating a passionate now? a future would no longer be a function of your past and a new possibility would be created.
i dont know that my words make any sense to anyone but me and i feel strongly that a life can be lived without "meanings" and "definitions". ultimately, ask yourself one simple question: am I happy? if you answer yes without conditions then i applaud you for being authentic. if you answer yes and have conditions to that happiness (ie. "yes im happy as long as I dont let someone get close...", etc) then i challenge you to consider what purpose those conditions serve you.
life can truly be all about dreams and passions without avoiding risks.
happy saturday everyone!!! :flowerforyou:0 -
Our society has set definitions over time. is it considered being a "slut" just because a woman has needs but isnt in a committed relationship? is it considered being a "guy" just because a man has needs and isnt in a committed relationship? consider both are masked definitions created by a society of cynical and judgemental people. consider needs and desires are apart of being human regardless of gender.
moreover, is a man or woman a "prude" just becuase they desire connectedness to accompany the physical desires? consider, again, these are attributes of a human.
all things have been masked by "our" meanings over time due to our experienced past. what would happen if we cleared the future of our pasts and lived in the moment of today creating a passionate now? a future would no longer be a function of your past and a new possibility would be created.
i dont know that my words make any sense to anyone but me and i feel strongly that a life can be lived without "meanings" and "definitions". ultimately, ask yourself one simple question: am I happy? if you answer yes without conditions then i applaud you for being authentic. if you answer yes and have conditions to that happiness (ie. "yes im happy as long as I dont let someone get close...", etc) then i challenge you to consider what purpose those conditions serve you.
life can truly be all about dreams and passions without avoiding risks.
happy saturday everyone!!! :flowerforyou:
WOW!!! Very well said. Happy Saturday to you too!0 -
Our society has set definitions over time. is it considered being a "slut" just because a woman has needs but isnt in a committed relationship? is it considered being a "guy" just because a man has needs and isnt in a committed relationship? consider both are masked definitions created by a society of cynical and judgemental people. consider needs and desires are apart of being human regardless of gender.
moreover, is a man or woman a "prude" just becuase they desire connectedness to accompany the physical desires? consider, again, these are attributes of a human.
WOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you!!!!!!!!!!
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LOL ok so I totally understand where the OP is coming from. I actually have 2 guys who are FWB and nothing more. I think I might be relationship burnt out . I'm 31 and basiacally have been in a relationship for 11 year straight (there was a six month break between my ex husband and ex-boyfriend) . And as for developing feeling from this One of the guys and I have been at this for about 4 months and nothing else in our friendship has changed lol. My friend told me this once and I think it helped open my eyes.====== SLUT- A women with the morals of a man.... (no offense guys) Women are the ones who judge women not men..... I'm pretty happy with the way everything is right now lol:bigsmile:
I'm envious...I want a FWB 0 -
But, I don't really miss the relationship part of relationships but man, I do miss the intimacy. I am not ashamed and will get my needs met when they arise but I would prefer one steady person. Hmmmmmm. How can I find one of those? lol
There are sites dedicated to people that just want sex buddies. I think one is called Adult friend finder or something like that.
FWBs end up being people that you wouldnt have a relationship with because of various reasons: to young, too old, confirmed bachelor, leaving the country soon, an ex so you know it doesnt work long term but the sex is great, work away a lot of the time etc etc etc
I think doing what makes you happy is the answer, dont label it, just do it!! :bigsmile:0 -
LOL ok so I totally understand where the OP is coming from. I actually have 2 guys who are FWB and nothing more. I think I might be relationship burnt out . I'm 31 and basiacally have been in a relationship for 11 year straight (there was a six month break between my ex husband and ex-boyfriend) . And as for developing feeling from this One of the guys and I have been at this for about 4 months and nothing else in our friendship has changed lol. My friend told me this once and I think it helped open my eyes.====== SLUT- A women with the morals of a man.... (no offense guys) Women are the ones who judge women not men..... I'm pretty happy with the way everything is right now lol:bigsmile:
I'm envious...I want a FWB
Yeah,me too. :ohwell:
Fwiw once you get to my age people don`t look at being okay with a casual encounter to have fun as being a "guy" but as somehow being pervy.0
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