Knowing Someone
Myslissa
Posts: 760 Member
Can you go out with someone for a month or two and still feel like you know nothing about them?
0
Replies
-
My gut feeling is that is troublesome unless you are looking for really deep things.
If you still can`t figure out any of his interests or even a bit of his life history then he is either hiding it intentionally or one of those "nice" guys that thinks he only has to talk about you for you to like him.0 -
If you're going out regularly and talking regularly over the phone, by a month or 2, yes you should feel like you know them. I don't think you'll know everything about them but there should be some security there that they've been intimate with you.
If not, then they're emotionally unavailable (either because they don't want to be intimate with you or because they have issues) or they not being themselves.0 -
I am thinking it is more the latter. It is just kind of meh!.... He is a nice enough guy but I want a best friend.0
-
are you kidding me I dated someone 7years and still feel like I didnt know him ! thats why he is gone.0
-
Yes...0
-
are you kidding me I dated someone 7years and still feel like I didnt know him ! thats why he is gone.
You are a much more patient woman than I......
I have been divorced for 16 years and I really just want a best friend. I will not settle. Some say it is picky but I think I should be in the aspect that it is my life. I want the guy that sees me doing something really silly and thinks to him self "Damn, I love that goofball"......0 -
Can you go out with someone for a month or two and still feel like you know nothing about them?
Dated my ex husband for 3 years... on our wedding night discovered he was a whole 'nother man. Some of that was my cluelessness (and female fantasizing- making him what I *wanted* him to be instead of seeing him for what he is). Some of that was his good acting until, as he told his father at our reception, "I got what I wanted."0 -
One night after being married for 7 years I found out I didn't know my husband (now ex) at all. As it all unfolded, I couldn't believe who I had been living with, sleeping next to, etc. He was not the man we all thought he was. He had many, many secrets.
When I look back, there were red flags. I'm extra cautious and hyper aware of what to look for in men now (without being bitter).
It's funny. When guys ask me the famous question "what are you looking for in a man?". It's simple. I just want someone I can be myself and someone who's himself with me. No need to hide anything, even your faults.0 -
Well...my husband of 14 years had a girlfriend I didn't know about .. so obviously I didn't know himmmmmmm. lol Oh yeh .. and babies.
So yeh .. couple months... pffffft.0 -
It's funny. When guys ask me the famous question "what are you looking for in a man?". It's simple. I just want someone I can be myself and someone who's himself with me. No need to hide anything, even your faults.
[/quote]
This^^^^... Is exactly it. A TRUE best friend.0 -
It's funny. When guys ask me the famous question "what are you looking for in a man?". It's simple. I just want someone I can be myself and someone who's himself with me. No need to hide anything, even your faults.
Yes!!0 -
True. I don't think I could NOT be myself in a relationship - that'd be a nightmare. I like to say what I think without having to think about what I say.
Yes!!It's funny. When guys ask me the famous question "what are you looking for in a man?". It's simple. I just want someone I can be myself and someone who's himself with me. No need to hide anything, even your faults.
Don't know where you find them... Seriously, would never imagine doing this.Dated my ex husband for 3 years... on our wedding night discovered he was a whole 'nother man. [...] Some of that was his good acting until, as he told his father at our reception, "I got what I wanted."
On topic... 2 months? :laugh: That's a short time.
Depends on what you mean by "know nothing about them" though. I would expect to know the main things about the person, but not that much more. Also it depends on the number of different situations you've been in together (travel, sport, aggression, shopping, etc.).
Maybe there is just no chemistry, or it just died so you simply don't feel comfortable with him anymore.0 -
Maybe there is just no chemistry, or it just died so you simply don't feel comfortable with him anymore.
[/quote]
Probably the case.0 -
One night after being married for 7 years I found out I didn't know my husband (now ex) at all. As it all unfolded, I couldn't believe who I had been living with, sleeping next to, etc. He was not the man we all thought he was. He had many, many secrets.
When I look back, there were red flags. I'm extra cautious and hyper aware of what to look for in men now (without being bitter).
It's funny. When guys ask me the famous question "what are you looking for in a man?". It's simple. I just want someone I can be myself and someone who's himself with me. No need to hide anything, even your faults.
I think we are all looking for someone we can be ourselves with and that doesn't hide anything, not even thier faults.0 -
True. I don't think I could NOT be myself in a relationship - that'd be a nightmare.
It takes a strong person to be who you *are,* when who you *are* is not palatable to the bulk of available dates. Most people I know change and/or "settle" because otherwise they're home alone on a Saturday night.
Of course, there's a fine line between standing up for what you want and just plain being a jerk who'll never change, lol. I like to think I'm in the former group.0 -
Can you go out with someone for a month or two and still feel like you know nothing about them?
I think after 2 months you should know enough to decide if you're going to be sticking together. I know that doesnt exactly answer your question, but I think it takes years to get to know someone! But not very long to decide if you WANT to get to know them better?
Good luck :flowerforyou:0
This discussion has been closed.