One For the Ladies: With Friends Like This
AllanMisner
Posts: 4,136 Member
So, I'm enjoying St. Paddy's night at a bar and I'm talking to this girl I just met. She is there with a few friends. She excuses herself to go to the restroom and tells me not to talk to her friends. When she returns, I ask her why she said that. She said, one of her friends will swoop in and take any guy who seems interested in any of her friends. The logic of this just defies me (on either side of the friend equation).
Ladies, do you have any friends like this? If so, why?
Ladies, do you have any friends like this? If so, why?
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Absolutely not! Obviously that person cannot be counted as a friend. I have had my heart broken by too many friends to allow someone like this in my life.0
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That person wouldn't be my friend.0
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Nope! I'd drop a "friend" if they did that to me.0
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When I was in college there were four of us in the dorm room and one of the roomates seriously went for every guy that was interested in one of us .. and she had a boyfriend! lol. She was crazy. Then one night one of the other girls got pissed at her and punched her. yikes. She moved out after that. lol.0
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yes....had one girl in our housing in college like that............was only interested in any guy that showed interest in any of us0
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So, I'm enjoying St. Paddy's night at a bar and I'm talking to this girl I just met. She is there with a few friends. She excuses herself to go to the restroom and tells me not to talk to her friends. When she returns, I ask her why she said that. She said, one of her friends will swoop in and take any guy who seems interested in any of her friends. The logic of this just defies me (on either side of the friend equation).
Ladies, do you have any friends like this? If so, why?
Better question........does the girl have potential for you ??0 -
Yup. Had it happen in high school. Friendship went sour. Rekindled the friendship years (20+) later, after both of us suffered through cheating spouses, and guess what? When we both started dating new men .....she did it again. Grr. This time, she's marrying the guy she stole. Lesson learned: A leopard never really changes their spots. I wonder if I'm invited to the wedding, lol!0
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I had a "friend" who would talk to me about guys I was interested in and literally the next time I saw him, he was going on a date with her. She also ran off with my rent money, so I kind of lost interest in maintaining the friendship after that...
Friends like that, who needs enemies?? :laugh:0 -
Yes...she is now my ex best friend. Anytime a guy showed interest in myself or any of the other girls in our group or vise versa she would swoop in and take over. She did while single and even when she had a bf....I was the last to cut ties with her...I thought she would grow up, but she didn't...she is married now...but to a guy who another friend showed interest in.0
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This just happened to me a few months back. I was out at a bar with someone I thought was my friend... pffftttt yea right. I thought this guy was attractive and seemed to have his stuff together more so than all the young guys there. She said she thought he was ugly. I go to the bathroom and right before I left I told her I was going to talk to him when I came back "famous last words"... I'm coming back and she is exchanging numbers with him.
Little did I know that in that short amount of time for my pee break she made plans to meet up with him at his hotel room. I wouldn't have known had he not told me about getting beer delivered to the room for them. So much for homeboy being ugly!!!!!
Needless to say I dropped her as a friend that night... and the funny thing is she kept texting me and emailing me afterwards... are you serious?0 -
yes, there are definitely women like that! A woman did it to me a couple weeks ago. I wouldnt exactly call her a 'friend' as it was the first (and last) social event I have been with her. But yeah, I've known of others over the years........
And yes, more importantly, did you swap numbers ? Ask her out on a date ? :bigsmile:0 -
It looks like this is a lot more common than I'd ever imagined. I guess she was smart to warn me off beforehand.
Yes, we exchanged numbers. But with almost 400 miles between us, I'm not sure how far things will go. Maybe I'm just enamored with the idea of having more reasons to go to the beach...0 -
In college most of my so called friends were like that. Needless to say - they disappeared faster than Houdini from my life. Anyone who would do that to a friend is not really a friend, and they are better off not being a part of your life at all.0
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I wouldn't stay friends with someone like that.0
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I know a girl like this - we lived in the same dorm hall freshman year. I quickly realized that is how she was, but nobody else really got it for a while. She knew I liked this one guy, and she would still flirt with him when she saw him anyways. Eventually others realized she was kind of a man stealer.
I see her every once in a while and I hate her still!0 -
I know more single women who are like that than I know who aren't... which is why I don't have many single female friends (and the ones I have are younger enough that we're not competing for the same guys)...not many good guys available so when you find one, watch out for the cat-fight.... But also this is *amisnercpa* we're talking about... lol... and guys like him don't come along very often.0
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I have a friend like this and we're not as close as we used to be. She's done things like go over and start hitting on a guy my other friends are interested in. And once at her best friend's birthday party, she went and sat in the best friend's fiance's lap "for a picture." It didn't make the best friend mad so I guess that's their business, but as far as I'm concerned, if I ever get engaged she better stay the hell away from his lap! (a boyfriend too for that matter)
It's bad enough that at one point when I had a gorgeous boyfriend I actually asked her to please not flirt with him. She was actually offended.
Like I said, we're not as close as we used to be and often I think that's a good thing.0 -
I know more single women who are like that than I know who aren't...
With this in mind, have any of you ladies ever done this to your friends?
It takes two to tango as well. So not only would a woman's friend be wrong for going after her female friend's boyfriend, the man is wrong for accepting these advances. In a situation like this, the best defense is a good offense. If a person is happy with the primary relationship, they won't cheat.0 -
With this in mind, have any of you ladies ever done this to your friends? I
No, never! I dont compete for men and I have utmost respect for my friends and their partners. And if a guy moves off to a 'friend' of mine after speaking to me? Well, I lose interest in him immediately. As you say, men need to have standards too!! :flowerforyou:0 -
I know more single women who are like that than I know who aren't...
With this in mind, have any of you ladies ever done this to your friends?
Not in a million years... I'm also the type of person who has a small circle of great friends as opposed to tons of casual friends. I think that makes a huge difference.0 -
When I lived in Austin, one of my best friends was a lesbian. We were both attracted to the same women (she tended to win out). She never tried to overstep me, and even one time asked if she could pursue someone I had dated.0
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I know more single women who are like that than I know who aren't...
With this in mind, have any of you ladies ever done this to your friends?
No! I'd never risk my friendship over a guy. Never!0 -
LOLand this is why most of my friends are guys.... Seriously though a have few female friends and we would never snatch a guy from one of the others its just bad form lol. That girl needs new friends0
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I know more single women who are like that than I know who aren't...
With this in mind, have any of you ladies ever done this to your friends?
No, I'm not one of "those" women. My cousin is... and it makes it tough to be around family with her there and one of my boyfriends because I always feel like she wants to steal them... so now I do the same as Amis's lady friend... I have to warn them in advance to stay away from her, conversations and everything included. She slept with one of my boyfriend's before and it took me a couple years before I forgave her. I will NEVER trust her again.0 -
My roommate in college was one of those girls. I think no less than 5 times a guy hit on me she would go out of her way to make sure she went home with him. (I wasn't going to anyway) but it was upsetting.0
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She slept with one of my boyfriend's before and it took me a couple years before I forgave her.
I hope it was a couple of years before you forgave him too0 -
I know more single women who are like that than I know who aren't...
With this in mind, have any of you ladies ever done this to your friends?
No, and my mindset is: "if the guy likes you, he's not the one for me," so I've even told my friends that I knew liked the same guy to go for him. A few months ago I actually lost a friend who would not believe me I wasn't trying to go after a guy she really liked. The worst part about it is he wasn't attracted to her in the least.0 -
I don't have any friends like this as far as I know. But, I don't date and do not have any guys interested so I wouldn't have to worry about it. I do have one friend who is married that is a huge flirt. She'll flirt with any male that has a pulse. Because of this -- I have thought that if I ever did meet a guy to go out with, I don't think I would want her to be around him. Flip that around -- no friend of mine would have to worry about me doing that to them. I don't approach guys and have never flirted a day in my life and I don't think I've been flirted with. Not that I would know it.0
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I had one "friend" who was like this in college. I was friends (at the time) with her and her cousin. Her cousin was quietly into a guy and she started flirting with him all the time, etc etc.
Needless to say, when that happened I started to notice her other self-centered behavior, and she was really evil to another friend so I dumped her from my friend list.
Sadly, she recently moved back to my city, lives about a mile from me and goes to my gym. I run into her every few months and she says "we should hang out! call me!"0
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