Socially awkward?

Moe4572

I had a date yesterday........was a second date. The first date was "good" not great but I was interested in seeing him again.
We decided to go walking at the beach and then maybe grab dinner. We walked for about an hour, talked for about an hour and a half then he asked if we should go get something to eat. So, all that went well. But then we got to the restaurant and he got "weird"...when the hostell asked for a name, he responded "oh, I am Ed, and this is Maureen"........then she said we could get drinks while we waited.....his response...."oh, I won't be drinking any alcohol today but maybe a soda" I wanted to tell him "she does not care....." Then the waitress came over and introduced herself to us, and so he then told her our names, too....she was very taken aback, and it was awkward at best. Then the whole thing with he wont be drinking alcohol again...........it was just weird.
And then the bill came, and I asked if he wantet money, and he said "If you want to go Dutch, that would be great,,BUT I want to take care of the tip" and then did not leave a good tip!!! I am ok with going Dutch, but the whole tip thing was wieird.

Am I overreacting to think he is just really odd and out there? I won't be seeing him again, I did give him 2 dates ( and the first one he was totally normal?????)

Katefab26

Uhhmm the one thing that is an absolute deal breaker for me is socially awkward people. I just can't date someone if I'm going to be embarrassed every time he opens his mouth.

AnnaPixie

Sounds to me like you're flogging a dead horse!! 2 dates is plenty enough to decide if you want a 3rd!! It doesnt really matter if WE think he's odd or not, if YOU think he is, then he isnt for you.

Time to move on :flowerforyou:

La_Amazona

It's not really easy to say he's socially awkward because I wasn't there (what was his tone, his facial expressions, etc). Maybe he was nervous for some reason?

But yes, if he really is socially awkward than I'd NEXT him.

The guy I recently went out with was awkward at times. I wouldn't say socially but he was extremely nervous and seemed insecure at times which turned me off from him.

Moe4572

No question....there will be no 3rd date, but just curious if I was being too hard............because a couple of friends' said 'maybe it was nerves"

JGT2004

If it was a 1st date maybe I would chalk it up to nerves but being the 2nd date I'm not sure I would waste the time of a 3rd date on him. Granted I don't date much but I also believe in not wasting time with someone you don't feel comfortable with. I know relationships need time to develop but if you know without a doubt it would never work, then I would end it there. That frees you both up to meet someone you may be more compatible with.

Edit: If you think you were misreading the situation then give him another chance. You need to be comfortable with the decision and if you can walk away without wondering "what-if" then you shouldn't beat yourself up about it.

flimflamfloz

He needs to relax then... Seriously though, are people really that nervous for a date?
It's like their life depends on it (well it might change your life, but you won't die is what I mean! :laugh: ). Normally for the early dates, you're just testing the waters and people should be comfortable!

La_Amazona

Okay totally way out there but could it possible he was nervous about kissing/ phsyical stuff if ya'll didn't on the 1st date??
That guy I talked about earlier in previous post told me later in the evening of our 2nd date AFTER I finally kissed him myself that he had to have a self talk in the bathroom because he felt he kept missing my signals for him to kiss me (he was). He also said he had wanted to kiss me since dinner (2 hours before). He told me he was nervous as can be.

Moe4572

Okay totally way out there but could it possible he was nervous about kissing/ phsyical stuff if ya'll didn't on the 1st date??
That guy I talked about earlier in previous post told me later in the evening of our 2nd date AFTER I finally kissed him myself that he had to have a self talk in the bathroom because he felt he kept missing my signals for him to kiss me (he was). He also said he had wanted to kiss me since dinner (2 hours before). He told me he was nervous as can be.

I think he was avoiding that because he had onions on burger.........

DMZ_1

There is usually some degree of awkwardness in early round dates. That's normal.

The tip story is the odd story from the lot. I don't understand why that guy made a big deal of the tip issue. I do think the alcohol consumption line was unnecessary on his part, but that could be overlooked if it were an isolated issue.

You already made your mind up. And I can see that the decision makes sense. Alcohol can calm nerves though, so maybe he should have had an alcoholic beverage.

catherine4211

I cringed reading your story. I don't think you are being too harsh. I am embarassed for you and him!

BondBomb

I cringed reading your story. I don't think you are being too harsh. I am embarassed for you and him!

Lmao - and THIS is why we are friends!

catherine4211

I cringed reading your story. I don't think you are being too harsh. I am embarassed for you and him!

Lmao - and THIS is why we are friends!

Thanks

lacroyx

There is usually some degree of awkwardness in early round dates. That's normal.

The tip story is the odd story from the lot. I don't understand why that guy made a big deal of the tip issue. I do think the alcohol consumption line was unnecessary on his part, but that could be overlooked if it were an isolated issue.

You already made your mind up. And I can see that the decision makes sense. Alcohol can calm nerves though, so maybe he should have had an alcoholic beverage.

yep. it alcohol has that effect on me. I can so see myself doing this before a date. I need to be careful though. Last time I got buzzed it was at a wedding. I don't remember but all my friends there told me I was more social and outgoing than I normally am, spoke alot of Spanglish, and I wanted to dance with everyone. :embarassed:

Showgirlbody

I went out with a socially awkward guy recently, too. (I actually think he has Asperger's on the Autism spectrum but too many of my friends work in that kind of work so could be reading into it). But yeah, some people may be goofy and not smooth and they usually know it and are able to play it off, but when they are really awkward, you know. This guy would dart his eyes around and not look at me but then say I didn't make eye contact when he tried to "cheers" me. And the way he dived in for a kiss (and grabbed my boob) out of nowhere without any flirtation or anything...he's 39, he should get it by now. lol So, if you aren't feeling it, whatever the reason-no need to beat a dead horse.

kimi131

Sounds to me like he was nervous. Although the tip and dutch thing sounds a little weird. I can't say I'd blame you for not going on a third one, but I do think he's probably just nervous.

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christine24t

If he was normal on the first date, that is definitely a little weird! There's a difference between being nervous and doing that kind of stuff. I think it also has a lot to do with the tone of voice and stuff, but clearly he was a little off because of the way you felt. I wouldn't date him again if I were you.