Overreacting and assuming...
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jaxdiablo
Posts: 580
So I didn't speak to the bellydancer all weekend, I had asked her about two weeks ago to go to the warrior dash with me, unfortunately she said she had a performance (I'm almost 100% sure she said she had a performance, I could be remembering wrong). She ended up not performing as far as I can tell, and was out with another guy. I don't know if the guy is an interest, or a friend, or whatever. I'm trying not to be freaked out about it, but I did tell her how interested in her I was, and thought she was receptive to it. I may be overreacting, and definitely assuming, but I'm not sure if I even have the right at this point to feel this way. I'm kinda confused.
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My answer to this is talk to her. You will never know the true answer without talking to her.0
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Yeah, I've been trying that... she didn't message me all weekend, and today I got two one word responses from her. I know she says she's busy all the time, but I'm kind of at a loss.0
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Yup, talk to her. She's the only one that knows what's going on on the other side.
How do you know she was out with someone else?0 -
Hey
Seems like you did mention earlier something about being in the Open Long Distance relationship, so maybe she is just "playing the field"..........so she may like you, just not willing/ready to be with just one?0 -
Yup, talk to her. She's the only one that knows what's going on on the other side.
How do you know she was out with someone else?
Tagged pics on facebook...0 -
Yeah, that would suck because I do want to be with just one person, I don't do well with sharing. I'm an only child, my toys are my toys... I missed that section when I was being raised.Hey
Seems like you did mention earlier something about being in the Open Long Distance relationship, so maybe she is just "playing the field"..........so she may like you, just not willing/ready to be with just one?0 -
Sorry, that is a total bummer to feel that way, regardless of what the actual situation is. But yes, try talking to her when you can.0
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Talk not text!0
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Yeah, that would suck because I do want to be with just one person, I don't do well with sharing. I'm an only child, my toys are my toys... I missed that section when I was being raised.Hey
Seems like you did mention earlier something about being in the Open Long Distance relationship, so maybe she is just "playing the field"..........so she may like you, just not willing/ready to be with just one?
See and this is why you need to talk because her "I'm interested" obviously means something completely different than yours. Obviously she isn't exclusive to you or to the LDR so if that's what you're expecting, you need to tell her how you feel. I'm sorry this happened. I'm sure it stung.0 -
It's her brother, or her friend from 20 years ago. Feeling better?She ended up not performing as far as I can tell, and was out with another guy. I don't know if the guy is an interest, or a friend, or whatever. I'm trying not to be freaked out about it, but I did tell her how interested in her I was, and thought she was receptive to it. I may be overreacting, and definitely assuming, but I'm not sure if I even have the right at this point to feel this way. I'm kinda confused.
Ok, now you don't have the right as far as I can tell to feel this way at this point. Slap yourself three times also.
Give her a break then.Yeah, I've been trying that... she didn't message me all weekend, and today I got two one word responses from her. I know she says she's busy all the time, but I'm kind of at a loss.
Don't text her more than necessary, and not more than necessary is: simply arrange another date in a chilled out and "hey are you available at some point" kinda way. Don't freak her out by being a needy kid.
Apart from that, as the others said, talk to her in person, if at all (about your "issue" with her)... Text = arrange date/short joke. Stop texting her with walls of text, if she does 1 liners, then you do 1/2 liners. Remember it is impossible to communicate a mood via text.
I don't know how keen I would be personally to bring this up (the "jealousy" / exclusivity kind of thing). Might not be what she is looking for/wants to hear right now.
Ultimately, she probably has got space for only one person in her heart too, but would probably not go for the needy one (and perhaps needs more time to "decide")... Can't say for sure though. :flowerforyou:0 -
Seems to me like she's open on facebook, open on LDR and open with you!!
This lady isn't ready for serious/ exclusive, and you may have to just accept that for now.
I know its tough, because you want more, but she does like you!! :bigsmile:
By all means, ask her where you stand and what she's feeling, but I think its obvious :flowerforyou:0 -
.......... if she does 1 liners, then you do 1/2 liners.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I nearly spat my green tea all over the screen :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
You crack me up Florian!! :flowerforyou:0 -
I use texting all the time. I know phone calls are more personal, but... I'm just better with texting, because you don't have to say much.
When I one word response someone, it means I have other things on my mind, I am annoyed, or I just don't feel like holding a conversation.
Send her an open invitation to get back to you when she has time. It will take pressure off her to be always available, and a few days of radio silence does wonders. For me at least, it reminds me that I miss talking to the person.
"I know you're busy, hope you're having a great day! Hit me up when you're free, I would love to see you again."0 -
I'm basically stepping back. I sent her a message asking if she had "Any big plans this week?", and I'm leaving it at that. I'll just wait to see what she says. I guess it's time to put my rod back into POF, and as bad as that sounds, that's basically what I'll be doing. lol0
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:blushing: I didn't know I was that funny... Even when I'm trying to be serious! :laugh:
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I nearly spat my green tea all over the screen :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:.......... if she does 1 liners, then you do 1/2 liners.
You crack me up Florian!! :flowerforyou:
@jax: I think this is the best for now. Let it rest for a bit! * thumbs up *0 -
.......... if she does 1 liners, then you do 1/2 liners.
Lol couldn't have said it better myself!0 -
I missed the whole Bellydancer thing, somehow so forgive me if you've already answered this... is this someone you're "dating?"
And, if so, does "dating" mean the same thing to you as it does to her? And do you know that by talking to her, or are you assuming she feels the same as you? I ask because I went out with someone for a couple months, was starting to feel like being exclusive and debating whether to initiate “the talk,†when out of nowhere he casually said we weren't "dating" but “headed that direction.†Talk about a punch in the gut!
I will admit that if she were still interested, seems like she'd reply with a bit more enthusiasm...but...is it at all possible that her performance cancelled, she knew you were out of commission doing the Warrior Dash and accepted another offer...?0 -
Next!0
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=D0
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My advice: QUIT.
If she want's you she'll come back. If she doesn't, it sucks, but you'll get over it. Better now than dragging yourself through the mud.0
