Dating Sites and...
Bikini27
Posts: 1,290 Member
The moment you realize you're a very small fish in a very, very large ocean.
Nothing like the rejected wink from a mildly interesting person to stab at your new found self confidence. I forgot to put on my armor before loggin in.
Any tips to power through?
Not looking for Mr. Right or even Mr. Right Now....just looking and hoping to pull an ace from my sleeve.
Nothing like the rejected wink from a mildly interesting person to stab at your new found self confidence. I forgot to put on my armor before loggin in.
Any tips to power through?
Not looking for Mr. Right or even Mr. Right Now....just looking and hoping to pull an ace from my sleeve.
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Replies
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Eh, don't worry about it. There are plenty of fish in the sea. I know that's cliche, but seriously I've never had that mindset as much as I do now and I think it's really helped how I approach the whole dating situation. I don't feel so rushed or pressured. So, let it bug you for a minute and then..... click onto the next profile! :flowerforyou:0
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You know, I tell myself that and nothing happens. you said it and I could take a deep breath again.
Thank you :flowerforyou:0 -
Try being a man. Rejection happens frequently. Most guys need to make contact with a lot of women online to get a date.0
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Rejection happens in real life and online.. it's part of dating.
Just say "NEXT!!" :happy:0 -
Try being a man. Rejection happens frequently. Most guys need to make contact with a lot of women online to get a date.Rejection happens in real life and online.. it's part of dating.
Just say "NEXT!!"
Soooo....Jay Z's On To The Next One needs to be my anthem?
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The ones who don't respond are just saving you the pain of a rotten first date or a future heartbreak.
That said, hope it gets better!!! :flowerforyou:0 -
Don't worry hey, you will hand out and be on the receiving end of rejection more than once for sure. It's just the way of the jungle really.
NEXT:laugh:0 -
Hmm.. still wondering if I should do this dating site thing. I think it would give me anxiety.0
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Hmm.. still wondering if I should do this dating site thing. I think it would give me anxiety.
Heaps people have success, can't hurt to try!0 -
Post here and we'll tell you how fabulous you are!! :happy:
I have absolutely no armour, it's a rare genetic condition :ohwell:0 -
Yep.The ones who don't respond are just saving you the pain of a rotten first date or a future heartbreak.0 -
The ones who don't respond are just saving you the pain of a rotten first date or a future heartbreak.
That said, hope it gets better!!! :flowerforyou:
THIS!!!0 -
Try being a man. Rejection happens frequently. Most guys need to make contact with a lot of women online to get a date.
truth.
Rejection get's easier after the first 10 times or so. After about 50 or 60 then you start to get jaded. I'm beginning to think thats where all the "Hey", "Whats up?" short messages come from. Why waste time writing a detailed message when there's an 80% + chance of getting rejected.
Anyway, keep your head up. Anyone who wouldn't respond to you is a fool. My best advice is try not to obsess over the dating site and certainly don't put your eggs in one basket. If you see someone you like definitely send a message, but don't stop looking. Try finding a few people that interest you and send out several messages.0 -
Thank you, all of you. :flowerforyou:
I'm not going to let the rejection get me down, just going to have some fun and see where it all leads!
It does take some getting used to, but the interest you get can offset the rejection pretty easily
O, and happy Friday!:drinker:0 -
Try being a man. Rejection happens frequently. Most guys need to make contact with a lot of women online to get a date.
truth.
Rejection get's easier after the first 10 times or so. After about 50 or 60 then you start to get jaded. I'm beginning to think thats where all the "Hey", "Whats up?" short messages come from. Why waste time writing a detailed message when there's an 80% + chance of getting rejected.
Probably true, but I still personalize my online dating site messages when I send them. Good luck getting a woman to see that perspective. Even if she did, she wouldn't care because it is all about what you can for her. Can you make her feel special and desirable?0 -
Thank you, all of you. :flowerforyou:
I'm not going to let the rejection get me down, just going to have some fun and see where it all leads!
It does take some getting used to, but the interest you get can offset the rejection pretty easily
O, and happy Friday!:drinker:
I look at the rejection this way........if you walked into a bar and there were 100 guys in there, how many would you reject...........makes it a little easier......
NEXT
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Even if she did, she wouldn't care because it is all about what you can for her. Can you make her feel special and desirable?
[/quote]
Ouch!0 -
I'm beginning to think thats where all the "Hey", "Whats up?" short messages come from. Why waste time writing a detailed message when there's an 80% + chance of getting rejected.
It's exactly this that makes me not mind the short "Hey", "Whats up?" kind of messages. If I'm interested, I reply soemthign short and sweet ("Hi") and wait to see if they write more. What irks me is the long paragraph that says nice things like how I have a beautiful smile, but is obviously canned as there's not one drop of personal information gleaned from my profile.0 -
I'm beginning to think thats where all the "Hey", "Whats up?" short messages come from. Why waste time writing a detailed message when there's an 80% + chance of getting rejected.
It's exactly this that makes me not mind the short "Hey", "Whats up?" kind of messages. If I'm interested, I reply soemthign short and sweet ("Hi") and wait to see if they write more. What irks me is the long paragraph that says nice things like how I have a beautiful smile, but is obviously canned as there's not one drop of personal information gleaned from my profile.
A change of heart, I love it!
I predict paying for dates in the future 0 -
A change of heart, I love it!
I predict paying for dates in the future
don't push it... that might be a bridge too far
(baby steps, lol)0 -
I'm beginning to think thats where all the "Hey", "Whats up?" short messages come from. Why waste time writing a detailed message when there's an 80% + chance of getting rejected.
It's exactly this that makes me not mind the short "Hey", "Whats up?" kind of messages. If I'm interested, I reply soemthign short and sweet ("Hi") and wait to see if they write more. What irks me is the long paragraph that says nice things like how I have a beautiful smile, but is obviously canned as there's not one drop of personal information gleaned from my profile.
I really wish more women thought like you. I love your opinions on so many things I've read in this forum.0 -
its better then going on a first date and realizing its crummy or spending all the time and energy of something that wont work0
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I really wish more women thought like you. I love your opinions on so many things I've read in this forum.
Aww thanks!
(And *I* really wish more men appreciated how I think. I'm not a dragon lady, I promise!)0 -
Nothing like the rejected wink from a mildly interesting person to stab at your new found self confidence. I forgot to put on my armor before loggin in.
Same here. I just started a week and a half ago. *sigh*0 -
let's be honest though.. winks are whack.
if you want to say hi to that person just say hi. you saw their profile, something in it caught your eye. just say that.
there really is no good way to respond to a wink IMO. either they wink back or you place the burden of conversation starting on them even though you're the one who should have done it.
just say "hi i like x movie as well. have you seen y" or something quick like that0 -
I really wish more women thought like you. I love your opinions on so many things I've read in this forum.
Aww thanks!
(And *I* really wish more men appreciated how I think. I'm not a dragon lady, I promise!)
Even though we have at times disagreed in honest discussion I hope I never gave that impression. :flowerforyou:0 -
The thing about dating sites is that it's a great way to "meet" a pretty large number of people...at your convenience! But the down side (for both parties) is that all you have to go by is a picture and a description...you have no way to know so many other VERY important details that would dictate true compatibility. Taking that into account, it's quite easy to write off a quality person simply because you have no way of immediately knowing just how quality they are.
Take "rejections" with a grain of salt...either he thought you two weren't compatible, or he wasn't able to figure out from your profile what a gem you are.
Either way...brush it off, and move forward. Don't let online 'rejections' define your worth...online dating definitely requires a thick skin. Best of luck to you! :flowerforyou:0 -
Online dating cracks me up. It also frustrates me as much as it cracks me up. I will deactivate my profile about after a week when I just get annoyed for whatever reason (i.e. no bites or just people that aren't my type contacting me).
So tonight, because I had no special plans, I reactivated my profile and changed my pics up. My main pic is the same as on mfp. HAH, my number of views/messages increased drastically. On one hand it's flattering, on another it's irritating that I have to have a certain "type" of pic to get a message. Plenty of views before, mind you, just not so many messages.
Most disheartening though, is so many who I have stuff in common with remind me of the last person I dated...and they also have some of the same traits that were issues for me. Woof...0 -
Online dating is a little weird to me. I'll meet people in person and then look at their Facebook/Twitter later and the image they presented to me is nothing like the online one. It's hard to judge people in an online forum when you don't get to hear their voice, see them move, etc. I usually end up judging them quickly, which isn't how I act when I actually meet people. And sometimes people are not photogenic. One of the guys that I kind of like looks nothing like his Facebook photos, he looks a lot better in person.
Also, if I'm on match.com and I see a 18/19/20 year old I'll turn them down but if I were to meet them in real life that might not necessarily happen. I think online dating is good sometimes, but it has a lot more negatives than positives.0 -
I'm trying the online dating thing at the moment. No bites. I try to be clever with my messages and ACTUALLY read the profiles. Like some of you mentioned... Online dating websites can be a hit or miss. I think my personality and my looks combined together makes me more charming and attractive when i met people in person but when people are only going off my profile and my pictures.. it's hard to come off as charming.. It sucks but lets face it.. More guys are contacting women before women do.0
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