My stalker
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toots99
Posts: 3,794 Member
...okay so he's not really a stalker, he doesn't know where I live. Thank God.
Back story: there was a guy from a few weeks ago that I was emailing with back and forth on match, and he seemed interesting, and so I gave him my number. He texted me while at work, and we chatted a bit. Then he started coming on really strong saying "I sooooo feel a connection with you...don't you feel it too?" I was thinking "Uh, hold the phone...I hardly know you, we've texted like 5 times. So I got a bit weirded out and and stopped texting with him. He proceeded to text me every hour on the hour with "Where r u?" (I F'ING HATE TEXT SPEAK!!!!!), "What r u doing?" "Where did u go?" until TWO IN THE MORNING! I finally texted him and said "Dude, chill out, it's 2am!" His reply sounded a bit irritated, but whatever. I never heard from him again.
Until yesterday morning. I get a text from a random number that says "Who is this? I got a new phone and I am trying to figure out my contacts" or some crap like that. I replied "I don't know this number, who is THIS?" He tells me his name, and I say "Oh, we 'met' on match." He asks "Why haven't we talked in a long time?" I told him "Because you texted me nonstop like crazy until two in the morning." He goes "Oh, sorry. I'm really not crazy or anything. Send me a picture. What r u doing, where do u live?" I ignored that text...and the next FIVE texts. I was coming home from vacation and traveling. I saw the 5 texts (Where r u? What r u doing? Why r u not talking to me? R u ok? U alive?) I shot a text that said "THIS is exactly what I was talking about. I am traveling, I'm not texting with you." He proceeded to ask me where I was, where I was traveling to, was I traveling for work? I ignored it. I woke up this morning to a good morning text, then got a how are you text in the afternoon, and just got an 'R u out of town still?" text.
WTF is up with this guy? Thank God he doesn't know anything else about me, he's crazy! No wonder he's single! :huh:
Back story: there was a guy from a few weeks ago that I was emailing with back and forth on match, and he seemed interesting, and so I gave him my number. He texted me while at work, and we chatted a bit. Then he started coming on really strong saying "I sooooo feel a connection with you...don't you feel it too?" I was thinking "Uh, hold the phone...I hardly know you, we've texted like 5 times. So I got a bit weirded out and and stopped texting with him. He proceeded to text me every hour on the hour with "Where r u?" (I F'ING HATE TEXT SPEAK!!!!!), "What r u doing?" "Where did u go?" until TWO IN THE MORNING! I finally texted him and said "Dude, chill out, it's 2am!" His reply sounded a bit irritated, but whatever. I never heard from him again.
Until yesterday morning. I get a text from a random number that says "Who is this? I got a new phone and I am trying to figure out my contacts" or some crap like that. I replied "I don't know this number, who is THIS?" He tells me his name, and I say "Oh, we 'met' on match." He asks "Why haven't we talked in a long time?" I told him "Because you texted me nonstop like crazy until two in the morning." He goes "Oh, sorry. I'm really not crazy or anything. Send me a picture. What r u doing, where do u live?" I ignored that text...and the next FIVE texts. I was coming home from vacation and traveling. I saw the 5 texts (Where r u? What r u doing? Why r u not talking to me? R u ok? U alive?) I shot a text that said "THIS is exactly what I was talking about. I am traveling, I'm not texting with you." He proceeded to ask me where I was, where I was traveling to, was I traveling for work? I ignored it. I woke up this morning to a good morning text, then got a how are you text in the afternoon, and just got an 'R u out of town still?" text.
WTF is up with this guy? Thank God he doesn't know anything else about me, he's crazy! No wonder he's single! :huh:
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Replies
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Whoa, I'm really sorry you got one of the nutters! As you say, thank goodness he doesn't know where you live, I really hope he starts backing off with the texts. Good luck with getting rid of the creep x0
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sounds like ignoring is your best option. he sounds pretty damn nuts, and is coming on WAY too strong.
so where do u live? ;-)0 -
so where do u live? ;-)
I'll only tell u if u text me 57 times a day.0 -
Definitely a nutter!! Keep ignoring him and he'll give up eventually :flowerforyou:0
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Agreed, just ignore him completely and don't enter into a conversation as to why. You already told him why. This happened to me a couple of times and although it was scary, nothing came of it and they gave up eventually.0
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Wow... That's messed up. Hopefully he will give up soon, he's probably OCD about texting lol.0
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Can you block the number?0
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Ummm.. wow.. some people have no social skills.. lol.0
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Yuck!! Scary larry!! Great job picking up on the red flags... You caught it early!!!0
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Now that's creepy. You could either block the number or if desperate enough change your number.0
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hmmm but from what i'm reading it doesnt sound like you're being clear about not being interested in him.
for instance "i'm travelling i dont want to text you" comes off as it's fine to text me when i'm not travelling. telling him to not text you at 2 am is an invitation to text earlier. if you're not interested and dont want him to contact you anymore then woman up and tell him.
take it from someone whose bushes regularly housed stalkers, most of the time they were there because i was trying to be too nice to tell them i wasnt interested and was hoping they would telepathically read my intentions.
just tell the guy you're not the one for him and wish him luck in his dating endeavors.0 -
I am going to see if I can block his number. If not, I guess I'll "woman up" and tell him to hit the road.
By the way, it's not that I didn't want to "woman up", I was just trying to avoid doing that because I don't want to piss him off. I don't know him. All he has is my number and first name, but I'm sure it's easy as pie to find where someone lives.
He's already texted me twice before 10:30 this morning.0 -
He's already texted me twice before 10:30 this morning.
This guy doesn't seem to be giving up.
Also, new technologies have a role in this. The text message is just such as easy method. It is super easy to send a text. 10 years ago, it was phone & email. 20 years ago, it was landline phone.0 -
I am going to see if I can block his number. If not, I guess I'll "woman up" and tell him to hit the road.
By the way, it's not that I didn't want to "woman up", I was just trying to avoid doing that because I don't want to piss him off. I don't know him. All he has is my number and first name, but I'm sure it's easy as pie to find where someone lives.
He's already texted me twice before 10:30 this morning..
Telling him to hit the road may help but in all likelihood generate another stream of texts about why you have reacted the way you have or an angry response. You did tell him why you stopped talking him last time ie that the non stop texting was a problem (see below). He heard you, but either doesn't accept that his behaviour is inappropriate or is too focused on his own need for contact to restrain himself. If you don't reply he will eventually stop.He asks "Why haven't we talked in a long time?" I told him "Because you texted me nonstop like crazy until two in the morning."0 -
I am going to see if I can block his number. If not, I guess I'll "woman up" and tell him to hit the road.
By the way, it's not that I didn't want to "woman up", I was just trying to avoid doing that because I don't want to piss him off. I don't know him. All he has is my number and first name, but I'm sure it's easy as pie to find where someone lives.
He's already texted me twice before 10:30 this morning.
understandable. trust me i've been there. you dont want to hurt anyone's feelings, you dont want to outright reject them, you just want them to evaporate away like the smell of your cat's most recent poo :laugh: but in the end, with a certain segment of guys of who arent attuned to subtle cues, you kind of have to rip the bandage off quickly. otherwise it comes across as sending mixed messages. some guys view those mixed messages as "chase me i'm interested. catch me if you can".
and yeah those guys already tend to be the types who only see what they want to see anyway, which might be why they arent paying attention to how you're sending off "leave me alone" vibes.0 -
So after the two texts from this morning, which went unanswered, he then texted me saying "u r a horrible texter LOL". I had had enough and I shot back "And 'U R' horrible at taking hints! I'm not trying to be mean, but I'm not interested! But good luck to you!" His reply? "Wow, alrighty...", like he was annoyed at me!?!? So far I haven't heard from him again...thank God.0
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“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” - Albert EinsteinSo after the two texts from this morning, which went unanswered, he then texted me saying "u r a horrible texter LOL". I had had enough and I shot back "And 'U R' horrible at taking hints! I'm not trying to be mean, but I'm not interested! But good luck to you!" His reply? "Wow, alrighty...", like he was annoyed at me!?!? So far I haven't heard from him again...thank God.
well at least he got the hint now. hope he leaves you be.0 -
So far so good.0
