Raising vegan children

evita6983

I have a ways to go until my daughter has to deal with the pressures of what other kids think (she's almost 2) but I just wanted some input from other moms who have dealt with this situation. I know growing up is hard enough and I feel a little guilty about making her "different" from most other kids. I still think it's the right thing to do for her health and for the environment so I'm not backing down (nobody ever said doing the right thing was easy!!). What do you do in social situations (play dates, parties, etc)? If she asks if she can have pizza/ice cream what would the right response be? I feel like it's her body so she absolutely has a say but I am also supposed to be guiding her in the right direction. Any advice would be appreciated!

aldousmom

Dr. Sears has some advice on what stance to take on your dietary habits as compared to other people's but really it's not about your food choices. It's developing a familial set of values that you will have to enforce the entire time she's growing up: Our family doesn't smoke cigarettes, our family doesn't ride bikes without safety gear, our family doesn't whatever... ...and every single family has their list.

Every family has values specific to them, and we don't change them up because we're around people who are different from us. They do not waver because it's Aunt Judy's birthday or my kid's best friend gets baptized. It doesn't mean that we will speak ill of people who make different choices, but we do insist that we do what we value. How much you explain WHY you value what you do will depend on a child's age or maturity, but every single family has things that are specific to only them and THAT's really what you're defending.

You can say things like we don't eat that , our family doesn't eat those things, etc. Dr Sears calls healthy foods "grow foods" which makes it a little easier for your kid to say in public without offending anyone. I do know of some people who use the words "allergic" or "lactose intolerant" pretty freely. In this day and age of so many people having health related dietary restrictions I can't imagine coming up with much issue.

I know every parent wants their child to fit in and feel as if they belong, but food doesn't have to be part of that belonging. If she is made aware of what things are good and right in YOUR family, the pizza or ice cream issue won't come up often. And if she never has it, why would she want it? Tell her it tastes gross...lol! I'm not sure at what point you'll be ok with her making her own decisions about her health, I have 3 adult children and I still don't trust them any more than I trust my 5 or 3 y/os. ! LOL!!

Aside from Dr. Sears, Furhman's "Disease Proof Your Child" is pretty practical. and I think on Happy Herbivore's Herby Parents FB page you might find more practical advice. Good luck!

vegan42

I think aldousmom's advice is very good. Here's our family's way of handling it. For our younger children we have a "birthday cake rule" which is that they refuse all non-vegan foods at gatherings except birthday cake at parties. Since most parents make one cake to feed everyone, it's unlikely they will buy more animal products to feed my kids. We felt that this one concession to fitting in would help our youngest children view veganism less as a burden and be more likely to choose it for themselves when they get older. After eight years old, we ask that they politely refuse the cake. And by the time they are teenagers, the choice of being vegan is theirs to make(although I only cook vegan at home). We talk often about why we make the choices we do, and even our 5 yr. old can explain very well to others why she chooses not to eat animal products. That's Why We Don't Eat Animals by Ruby Roth is a really good book for explaining these choices to children. I should add that for gatherings where non-vegan food will be served, I always bring my kids' favorite dishes. I make sure what we're serving is way better than the other junk. And it feels great when the other children at the potluck/playdate/gathering ask if they can eat our food instead.

Meganalva

vegan42- what are your kids favorite vegan dishes? I'm new to the vegan world, been at it about a month or so. I'm introducing the new foods to my nearly 6 year old and 3 year old and it isn't easy. My 3 year old is very open with it....the almost 6 year old isn't so much. He notices that the foods taste different than the foods we had before. We switched to almond milk and he complained for about a week but now he doesn't say anything anymore. He doesn't really like vegetables either so it makes it difficult. I let them eat whatever still....they go to daycare & school and it's really hard to limit what they eat so far because I know the daycare provider won't cook a special meal for them when she's already cooking for the other kids, ya know? Ugh, it's so difficult! If only I could stay home with them

evita6983

Thank you for responding! I know it's different for every family but it sounds like communication is a huge key to it all which we are big on as it is. I will definitely be picking up some books when the time is right. Good luck to you all in your vegan and exercise journeys!