New To Group...

hollyelee

Hi. I wanted to introduce myself. I'm Holly and I was diagnosed bipolar 2 years ago after going off the deep end and doing all sorts of craaaaaazy things. Currently though I am also suffering from postpartum depression as I had a baby 6 months ago. I'm definitely having a struggle with it all lately. I never know what I"m going to wake up feeling like plus I have to "suck it up" because I have to be a good mommy and most times I feel like I'm failing. I currently take Risperdal 1 mg at night and Wellbutrin 300 mg (which was recently upped due to depression. I really hope my medicines aren't going to make it hard to lose weight. I'd really like to come off the Risperdal at some point.

I gained 40 lbs from my pregnancy and only lost maybe 10 at the most but I've always always always been overweight. I can't remember a time when I wasn't.

I'm just hoping I can find some support and people who kind of understand what it's like to be bipolar. I get so down these days it's hard to see any light at all.

beyondjupiter

Hi Holly!

I added you for a reason.. because I understand what you are going through. While I only have dealt with depression and anxiety personally. Both my partner and best friend were diagnosed bipolar. My former best friend for about 8 years was borderline. I just seem to attract the mentally ill, I guess

Seriously though, I have had PPD twice and completely understand what you are going through. The first time I didn't even know. I had my daughter when I was 20 and had no idea I was depressed. I was just overwhelmed all of the time and felt like I couldn't do it and I was a bad Mommy. In retrospect I was terribly depressed. I seriously never even got dressed. I wore a bra and panties 24 hours a day. I didn't think anything of it then but I definitely know now that was a sign.

I am still breastfeeding my second child who is 2 1/2. I do want to wean him soon, it's just hard. The doctor says my depression is still PPD because when you breastfeed your body still has you in that "Mommy mode". Not sure if that is true or not.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I am here to support you! Message me anytime you'd like

Jen

hollyelee

Thanks Jen! I'm not breastfeeding my son so maybe I'll get over PPD sooner than later. It's just so hard. Especially since my doctor's office ain't called in my Wellbutrin and I've been out for 2 days. >:| Grr. Yesterday was such a difficult day because he was just inconsolable. I couldn't make him happy for the life of me. I felt like such a horrible mom because I was being so impatient with him. And I ended up crying right along with him several times yesterday. I think he's starting to teethe. /sigh

My best friend was borderline, bipolar, ADD, and everything else you could think up. But she wouldn't get help because she thought she knew more than doctors. We are not friends anymore unfortunately So I know what ya mean about attracting the mentally ill.