Naked Confidence!
RMuske
Posts: 271 Member
Ok, so I am fairly thin and kind of in shape but I still have what I consider to be "trouble areas that require toning." I look good in my clothes but less and less good NOT in my clothes.
How do you keep your confidence and not focus on your flaws? Especially if you are going to by intimate with someone?
And Please no hate responses. I know I am thin and I am not talking about weight loss. Everyone is entitled to be a self conscious about certain parts of their body, even thin people.
Any ab/booty work out suggestions while we are at it?
How do you keep your confidence and not focus on your flaws? Especially if you are going to by intimate with someone?
And Please no hate responses. I know I am thin and I am not talking about weight loss. Everyone is entitled to be a self conscious about certain parts of their body, even thin people.
Any ab/booty work out suggestions while we are at it?
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Replies
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If you are in a room naked with me and you think I am noticing flaws then you are crazy.
Now not trying to be rude but to put it in as practical and exact way as I possibly can,for you to be thinking such nonsense is self defeating and silly.
If you are naked with me I want to be doing fun things with you,accept that as fact and stop with the rest.
Don`t tell me you can`t because you can,you are making a choice to try to find something to fret about...you can just as easily choose not to.0 -
Just the normal stuff. And squats apparently.Any ab/booty work out suggestions while we are at it?
I've got the same issue, I think. I don't care too much these days, I just am how I am, and I'm trying to improve - so at least whatever people think about the current me won't affect me deeply: "At least I'm trying to improve, woman!"I look good in my clothes but less and less good NOT in my clothes.
How do you keep your confidence and not focus on your flaws? Especially if you are going to by intimate with someone?
Anyway, to reply to your question, the thing is when I'm getting naked I guess it's a bit too late for the girl to say "Erm actually, get dressed and get the fvck off! You've got some belly fat pal."
And to be honest, by the time I get naked, I would assume the girl can forgive some fairly minor flaws here and there, since nobody is perfect and she should know about it since she's not perfect either for sure.
So I'd say the same thing for you: sure you're not perfect, but if you're getting naked, I guess the person should at least have enough attraction to not just ditch you because you're not perfect, especially if you're working on it (obviously not talking about one night stands here, where how you look doesn't matter - you're just in it for It)0 -
I hate how I look naked.
BUT I've started to like it more since I started lifting heavy. Deadlifts/squats completely changed the shape of my bottom. Give 'em a try, I promise you will LOVE what they do for your body.0 -
i guess if you keep resisting the thought of you looking bad when your naked or try to change it by telling yourself your confident then those bad thoughts about yourself will stay there.
its better to accept yourself for who you are, at that point in time, you are what you are, and you can't be in the past or the future, you can only be there.
lol it sounds weird i know, but i find that once you accept it without judging yourself for thinking it, it usually disappears for me
hope that helps!0 -
Hell I'm not confident in how I look with clothes on. If I am naked with someone they've already seen me dressed and decided I looked good enough to get undressed with. If you are really worried about it, just make sure whatever you are doing while naked is so damn good the person you are with keeps his eyes closed or rolling in the back of his head or bugged out to the point of blindness.0
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I'm pretty much the same way. I have lot enough that clothes are now looking decent on me, but still having extra weight. But my main flaws / insecurities all focus around stuff I can't change usually resulting from past medical problems so I don't worry much about it.0
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My friend (who is a good 100+ lbs overweight) has great sex. She said she takes her dang clothes off and if he wants it, he will like it.
She said she has YET to have a man walk out :laugh:
If I ever get there, I will let you know
I guess I will have to DO it first though, right????:laugh:0 -
I often think that thin people have more body image issues than fatter people!!
Working out will help, but really you need to learn to love yourself and realise that NOBODY is perfect!
Good Luck :flowerforyou:0 -
Naked time: Try just hanging out naked by yourself more often so it feels more natural and less like a production. If you don't feel comfy naked on your own then likely that will translate in front of someone else as lack of confidence...that's silly because you're a rock star.
Trouble spots: If a guy is standing naked in front of you do you look at his arms and say, hmmm...that one is a little flabby on the left...nope! Everyone has challenges/flaws so just accept them/love them as challenges as you continue to work on your fitness goals.
Both of the above is all in your head so you end up being your own worst enemy. Flip the script on yourself: be naked solo more (not picking yourself apart in front of a mirror naked, just be naked) and love your flaws as challenges.
:flowerforyou:0 -
I often think that thin people have more body image issues than fatter people!!
Working out will help, but really you need to learn to love yourself and realise that NOBODY is perfect!
Good Luck :flowerforyou:
I think I had more body issues at 20 and 105 pounds . I am not sure there is a person out there that doesn't.0 -
I think pics will help me craft a better answer to your original post.
--P0 -
I hate how I look naked.
BUT I've started to like it more since I started lifting heavy. Deadlifts/squats completely changed the shape of my bottom. Give 'em a try, I promise you will LOVE what they do for your body.
This.
Lifting changes your body composition. Toning, is such a fluff word, you cant shape muscele. Its genetic.
If you want to look good naked and abs and *kitten* are you problems issues.. Do heavy (relative to your strength) compound lifts.
Im on my way to nice abs.. Havent done one sit up or crunch ever.0 -
Im on my way to nice abs.. Havent done one sit up or crunch ever.
They didn't make you do those in grade school as part of physical education?0 -
Im on my way to nice abs.. Havent done one sit up or crunch ever.
They didn't make you do those in grade school as part of physical education?
haha.. Yeah probably but I went I meant. Since from me starting to actually exercise and lift etc I havent done one since!0 -
Damn, I was secretly hoping this was a picture thread. Moving on.
And for the OP, I agree with the above posts that if you are naked with a guy, he is definitely not picking things he doesn't like. If by some chance he does say something, find someone else...not worth it.0 -
Keep the lights off. That's what I do!
But just incase it's daylight then you might want to do the exercises other people suggested.0 -
I completely understand you. I am honestly very nervous at the thought of anyone ever seeing me naked. I am not very confident with clothes on - and I do not look very good naked. I don't really have any advice but just know you are not the only one who feels the same.0
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You seriously just have to be confident ladies. Theres not going to be some magical miracle moment or a line of words that will make you feel better about your body. It will come with time, but you will need to start at it.
Its not like you are walking down the street naked for the general public to see, you are with a man or woman that has already decided that they like you enough to be in the situation with you, in all honestly, get on with having fun and stop being so paranoid because of your muffin top or stretch marks... Cause honestly.... we dont mind!!!0 -
I've been waiting all day to respond to this. I've been out.... actually stuck in the desert but, yeah... that's another post!
Ok -- so some of you have an idea of my ex-husband... VERY abusive in every way. I came out of my marriage thinking I was trash. He made be BELIEVE I was ugly, no man would ever want me... I was sub-par at best.
Fast forward 4 years (yes, this MONTH it will be four glorious years rid of him - PARTY) - it's taken awhile but guess what? I'm 30lbs heavier now but I'm developing a wonderful self image and self-confidence. When I started on MFP again at the beginning of this year, a friend of mine told me to take some before pics. It completely wigged me out and put me in a melt-down. I hated the way I looked I hadn't taken a photo of myself in a long time... let alone something like a "before" pic. Anyway, a day or two later I did. I looked at it and tried to find the positive things. I've since taken many more... and yes, some completely nude... but always as a mental exercise to find something wonderful about my body. I can honestly say that even though I'm a bit heavy right now, I'm fine with the way I look naked. I'm confident that if I'm with a guy (and yes, I have been with one... LOL) he will think I'm beautiful and sexy. I don't need the lights off or to hide.
I guess what I'm trying to say is this... it might help to just take a few pics of yourself without clothes on. Find something beautiful about the photo. Just look at it as if it were someone else. Don't do this when you're in a negative mood, but rather a peaceful mood. I know for me I think, damn... nice hips, my breasts are nice and I do notice the thicker mid-section but in comparison to the good things I think as an overall package I'm quite hot. This carries over into everyday life and I have pretty killer confidence now. If someone doesn't like me it's okay. It's not about me... it's about them. I'm good with me, and who I am - physically and personality.
Just try it... I dare you!
:flowerforyou:0 -
It all boils down to lowering your overall body fat percentage but adding more LBM. In your case, you need to gain muscle first (note you'll also gain some fat along with it but theres a way to minimize it) then proceed to fat loss. To be honest I really go into work it out to lose more fat & add muscle before I get totally confident naked.0
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If you are in a room naked with me and you think I am noticing flaws then you are crazy.
This man speaks the truth.
Re exercises:
core: plank, t-pushups, hanging leg raises, ab wheel rollouts (any big compound exercises)
glutes: squats, deadlifts, barbell hip thrusts, heavy kb swings0 -
If I get to the point that I'm nekkid with a man, I ROCK it. And, any man who would fixate (or even notice) stretch marks, pudgy areas, etc needs to get his attention span checked and therefore doesn't need to see me nekkid!0
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just jump in the pool. You get used to the water.
In other words, the more time you spend naked around someone the more confident you are when doing so. But you gotta just jump in. Embrace your fearlessness. Cause you know, its sexier anyway.
Also guys have specialized eyeballs that dont see what we are hung up on the most. All they can see is NAKED!!!!!!0 -
I am really insecure with my body right now too but usually when you get naked with a guy he is ready to jump on you (or you jump on him) than looking for fat or flab on your body....We are ALWAYS our own worst critics...I have had guys point out scars or flaws to me on them and if they hadn't pointed it out I would have never noticed...We just have to remember that they are not noticing everything that we notice about ourselves....
Wow, I really need to take my own advice next tiime (if ever) that I get naked with a man!!!
ETA: Sometimes what I have done was just pretend to feel confident about my body and it made me actually really feel more confident with myself...Try it, it might work for you!!
Also, I really like what someone above said about walking around the house naked and get comfortable with your body and being naked...Once you are comfortable by yourself then you will eventually be more confident in front of a man...0 -
Funny thing, I am not thin and I have no problem being naked. Do I look awesome naked? No probably not but I feel sexy. I have all the fun after baby things like stretchmarks, c-section scar and flap but that doesn't stop me. It is kind of weird but I am much more comfortable with my body naked than I am in clothes. It is probably the boobs. lol0
