Why?
Options

UsedToBeHusky
Posts: 15,227 Member
I never used to have a problem attracting men. Even when I was heavier, men would still hit on me. But it seems like lately, particularly since I've lost weight, men don't seem to be attracted to me anymore. They might look, but inevitably, have no interest whatsoever. What happened?
I'm actually a much happier and more positive person than I have ever been. I am more independent than I have ever been. I have a lot more to offer than I ever have. But for some reason, I never spark anyone's interest anymore. Am I missing something?
I'm actually a much happier and more positive person than I have ever been. I am more independent than I have ever been. I have a lot more to offer than I ever have. But for some reason, I never spark anyone's interest anymore. Am I missing something?
0
Replies
-
Were you hit on a lot before? Because if not THAT much, might just be a bad pass right now (it happens).
Have you changed your activities? Where you go out or how often you go out?0 -
Come to think of it, I used to get WAY more attention in bars than I do now. Oddly enough, I'd wear more "clothes" (long sleeves and jeans) versus cute tops and shorts now. Maybe because I cut my hair?
Let's call it a bad pass. What's the chances of us being surrounded by chubby chasers?!? :laugh:0 -
Maybe they feel more intimidated now? This is just a stab in the dark.0
-
i think theres an intimidation factor, some guys like the hottest girl in the place others like the best attainable. That doesnt mean you're too hot to get hit on but perhaps hot enough to make a guy doubt himself, of course this is easily changed by inviting gestures a smile, eye contact and as impossible as it seems, actually approaching a guy first.0
-
Maybe they feel more intimidated now? This is just a stab in the dark.
we're >><< here...just dont stab me lol0 -
Yeah possibly intimidation or just a termporary drought. Just be yourself...0
-
Maybe they feel more intimidated now? This is just a stab in the dark.
we're >><< here...just dont stab me lol
:laugh: I'll avoid that general area then, for safety's sake0 -
Not on a conscious level, but I sometimes wonder if the seasons play a part in this. For example, a summer romance might seem nice to one person, but for another they are simply too busy with vacation, plans with friends, etc. so dating takes a back burner. And in the winter people hibernate a little. I just think we get into patterns and the seasons and weather sometimes play a role in what we do and who we contact.
On a smaller scale, and I mentioned this to a friend before, that if we get several days of rain in a row, my messages from online dating blow up. I assume it's due to being stuck indoors and the boredom factor...0 -
Remember that datings like a roller coaster with ups and downs.... Personally I think your probably just going through a bit of a dry spell. Happens to the best of us. Keep going out and having fun and your sparkly personality will bring the next wave of men lol0
-
i think theres an intimidation factor, some guys like the hottest girl in the place others like the best attainable. That doesnt mean you're too hot to get hit on but perhaps hot enough to make a guy doubt himself, of course this is easily changed by inviting gestures a smile, eye contact and as impossible as it seems, actually approaching a guy first.
Oh, I am flirtatious and inviting. That is my nature. Always been that way. I just don't understand why my "charms" seem to have diminished. LOL!0 -
Maybe it is just that you are hanging around a different type of person now. Not that I know your situation but I know I changed the type of friends and activites I do now compared to what I did when I was heavier. I am usually found out playing sports or at the gym now then at the bar.0
-
Maybe it is just that you are hanging around a different type of person now. Not that I know your situation but I know I changed the type of friends and activites I do now compared to what I did when I was heavier. I am usually found out playing sports or at the gym now then at the bar.
That is a pretty strong possibility too. I've made some pretty major life changes in the last ten years.0 -
Men are like buses, none for an hour, then 3 come along! :bigsmile:0
-
Men are like buses, none for an hour, then 3 come along! :bigsmile:
So Anna, are you going to pay to ride?0 -
i think theres an intimidation factor, some guys like the hottest girl in the place others like the best attainable. That doesnt mean you're too hot to get hit on but perhaps hot enough to make a guy doubt himself, of course this is easily changed by inviting gestures a smile, eye contact and as impossible as it seems, actually approaching a guy first.
ugh this! men are so dumb.
same here. i have lost weight, gotten a better job so i'm way more independent now. i've been told i'm intimidating. its kinda frustrating.0 -
Men are like buses, none for an hour, then 3 come along! :bigsmile:
I'd go with this.... woman are pretty much the same. I hit streaks where I'm the greatest thing ever and then the next month I must have repellant on or something.0 -
Maybe it is just that you are hanging around a different type of person now. Not that I know your situation but I know I changed the type of friends and activites I do now compared to what I did when I was heavier. I am usually found out playing sports or at the gym now then at the bar.
I can definitely vouch for this. I haven't lost a whole lot of weight, but over the years as I got in better shape my friends have gotten younger and fitter. And guess what? No one I hang out with ever hits on me anymore. It stinks sometimes, but I have decent results online so I don't let it make me feel bad. It's just that I have to look at my friends now and realize any guys in our group are going for younger girls. I'd rather have friends to do all my fit stuff with than be back hanging out wiht the people who teased and taunted me for trying to eat right.0 -
Men are like buses, none for an hour, then 3 come along! :bigsmile:
So Anna, are you going to pay to ride?
pay? No!! :huh:
Ride? Depends on No3!!! This is a month of buses!!! :laugh:0 -
I kinda see men like the weather - hot spells, cold spells. Your charms have no where diminished, its the men around you have not caught on to what a wonderful sparkly woman you are!! Your wit and charms will soon be charming them all over again and you will have many lingering for your attention0
-
I think a lot of its is perspective and how you come across to others through your own thoughts. Not that long ago, I would complain constantly about guys not liking me and not getting dates. Then I reread The Secret and it inspired me to look at dating from a different perspective. I looked at getting asked out as a possibility, instead of out of reach. I started going to activities that would make ME happy, instead of just going to meet guys. So I started attending an acting/improv class and lo and behold a couple months in, I meet this guy who automatically comes up to ME and starts flirting. Two months later, we went out on a date.
So in short, try changing your thinking, your perspective, and your surroundings. Oh and be patient.0 -
Men are like buses, none for an hour, then 3 come along! :bigsmile:
LOL
I so agree with this! I might go through a drought, and then all of the sudden, I'm flooded with men. Why can't they just come along one at a time???0 -
Men are like buses, none for an hour, then 3 come along! :bigsmile:
LOL
I so agree with this! I might go through a drought, and then all of the sudden, I'm flooded with men. Why can't they just come along one at a time???
we want the wanted.0 -
we want the wanted.
LOL Makes sense! But how do you seem to sense that? When it rains, it pours.0
This discussion has been closed.