Im well on my way and...
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kimismissing
Posts: 2
Everyday is different. I struggle some days more than others.
Well, I was released from inpatient May 26th after a month and a half. When I was sent away in April I had a prognosis of less than 2 weeks to live. I thought Id never get better, Id been ED for 5 years and could have dropped dead from heart failure at any moment.
Now, I need some encouragement.
I dont purge anymore.
I dont skip meals.
But...
I obsess. like crazy. my whole day is consumed by how low calorie I can eat. I havent eaten out and ordered what I WANTED in forever. I havent eaten ice cream in MONTHS and...
I just dont want to think about ED anymore. I want to SILENCE "the voice" forever, to the point I never think about it.
Is it possible do you think?
Are any of you to the point where you can eat fear foods or go out and eat or get ice cream with your friends?
I mean Im 19. In college for nursinf. I feel like I have so much more to worry about then what Im putting in my mouth.
Well, I was released from inpatient May 26th after a month and a half. When I was sent away in April I had a prognosis of less than 2 weeks to live. I thought Id never get better, Id been ED for 5 years and could have dropped dead from heart failure at any moment.
Now, I need some encouragement.
I dont purge anymore.
I dont skip meals.
But...
I obsess. like crazy. my whole day is consumed by how low calorie I can eat. I havent eaten out and ordered what I WANTED in forever. I havent eaten ice cream in MONTHS and...
I just dont want to think about ED anymore. I want to SILENCE "the voice" forever, to the point I never think about it.
Is it possible do you think?
Are any of you to the point where you can eat fear foods or go out and eat or get ice cream with your friends?
I mean Im 19. In college for nursinf. I feel like I have so much more to worry about then what Im putting in my mouth.
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Replies
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I am so with you. I feel addicted to tracking EVERYTHING in what I eat which controls my food choices. Im not sure if this voice will ever go away. Like on my birthday I said I will eat whatever I want and wont care. Well, my birthday came, I ate EVERYTHING that I had been missing, and just a couple days after my birthday, the voice came back. Perhaps the best thing that you and I can do is hold each other accountable, or find someone irl to hold us accountable to just live. Its so hard, and I hate it.0
