I hate Facebook

farmers_daughter

Sometimes I wonder why it takes soo little to knock me off my "happy" pedestal.

Of all people I shouldn't be whining because I've done so well lately. So there's a guy that I've been keeping my eye on and today I check facebook and it says he's now in a relationship. :grumble: Lord I hate Facebook

So I waited too long I assume. The people who were pushing me towards him I can only assume didn't know he was seeing anyone.

So....now I have that feeling of "Now What". That guys gone. Like when I read it, I wanted to literally kick myself, and I'm pretty sure I said "You fn dumb@ss....it's your own damn fault".

I can't really even say that I'm aware he liked me. He knew I was interested in him because people told him I was. So in a way I think I'm glad that he's "gone". Because if he would have been interested he would have at least said something. Right? HA HAHAHAH..... Sorry fellas I have little faith that a guy will ever approach me. That's why I do the approaching normally. But he would have said Hi, or invited me to his races without me asking....etc. Maybe? Never been approached so I don't know how it's done.

So I'm bummed, really bummed, almost pissed. I'll get over it. I've learned that time heals alot of hurts...but this one makes me wanna puke for some reason...it's like I've lost something but I really haven't. That I'm not wanted. That feeling at the bottom of your stomach that screams YOU'RE ALONE!!! :devil: Thank god he no longer screams "Your fat, ugly, and your mother dresses you funny" :happy: (See I still have some humor)

So how do you rid yourself of the "alone" feeling. I know I'll have things to do but sometimes no matter how many "things" you have to pre-occupy your time with, those thoughts/feelings creep up on you. (Well me anyway)

Sorry to be a bummer, I'll come around but what are your thoughts?

disneywm76

How do I rid myself of the alone feeling? I do things that make ME happy and quit caring about the rest of the world. I lavish my kids with extra attention becasue it makes me happy. I try not to think about it. But sometimes, I just have myself a little pity party and move on. Every now and then, something will happen and that feeling will hit me like a ton of bricks. When it does, I just embrace it, suffer through it, and then get back to living my life like I was before. I know that probably doesn't help you much, but that's what I do. :flowerforyou:

JanieJack

That stinks. Especially since others were encouraging you (whether or not they knew he was seeing someone, that still stinks).

If I were in your shoes, I'd take some time to grieve... my typical fall back is a sappy movie, box of tissues, and raw green beans (lol even though I'd rather mope with a bag of chips, derailing my health goals will make me feel even WORSE the next day).

When I get to feeling lonely, I reach out to others and usually find someone to spend my time with. Sometimes this has the added benefit of forcing me to try something new. Also prayer and study. Good books or movies. Doing something that makes me feel pretty (within budget).

Hope that helps. {{{hugs}}}

farmers_daughter

If I were in your shoes, I'd take some time to grieve... my typical fall back is a sappy movie, box of tissues, and raw green beans (lol even though I'd rather mope with a bag of chips, derailing my health goals will make me feel even WORSE the next day).

That's awesome....I'm glad someone else eats them like that.

Yeah, I've found that acknowledging the feeling rather than trying to hide/ignore it helps. It's funny I suppose this is natures way of making me get rid of some tears..... Can't have rotten tear water floating in my head. LOL.

shammxo

I'm sorry That's a terrible feeling.
Call up some friends, do some stuff for yourself. Maybe try and find some more humor in it. He probably isn't worth it, and if a guy IS worth it, it'll just work. You'll both put in the effort, and it won't be a power struggle.
If it makes you feel any better, I had to delete my facebook because my depression had gotten so bad and seeing how much fun everyone else was having made it even worse. (Ended up being one of the best decisions I've made!)

Carl01

I know this probably won`t help but I just won`t allow myself to feel that way anymore.
The person that did all the time is so distasteful to me that I can`t let myself slip back.

Having said that though there are preventative things one can do,for instance this is the week of our county fair which like the holidays is a "together" thing.
Walking around does make a person feel alone in a sea of people so I will just go this weekend for the tractor pulls and to look around a little.

DMZ_1

I do not list a relationship status on Facebook, regardless of my relationship status.

Nothing happened with this guy for you, so it is no biggie. I'm sure other people are interested in you. You'll find someone.

Mellie289

Aw, sorry sweetie.

I agree that if he was interested in you, he would have done something if he knew you were. That's the green light to go ahead without the fear of rejection. He probably already had his eye caught by someone else. It happens to all of us.

I remember a guy I really liked years ago telling me about awesome this girl Annabelle was - it was like knife through my heart... or a kick in the stomach. I certainly couldn't breathe for a few seconds. My strategy for dealing with such things has been to wallow in the misery for the night with much alcohol and to get it over with. Definitely not a strategy I recommend for everyone, but it works for me despite a second day of feeling sorry for myself because of the hang over.

Treat yourself kindly and try to come to peace with the idea that he wasn't the one for you. I find it hard to believe that you will go on much longer without being approached by a guy looking at your pictures. You're adorable! Sometimes, it's hard to be patient. As for not feeling alone.... that's why I spend so much time on the internet with friends. I LOVE Facebook because of that.

{{{{Hugs}}}

farmers_daughter

I know this probably won`t help but I just won`t allow myself to feel that way anymore.
The person that did all the time is so distasteful to me that I can`t let myself slip back.

Having said that though there are preventative things one can do,for instance this is the week of our county fair which like the holidays is a "together" thing.
Walking around does make a person feel alone in a sea of people so I will just go this weekend for the tractor pulls and to look around a little.

Tractor pulls! I wanna go!
Some of it is my outlook too which I think for the most part is ok, I just have to try harder, I avoided the fair this year since there really werent' any good attractions like in the past, and it makes me 1) feel old, and 2) miss having someone to go with.
I just have to try harder.

farmers_daughter

I do not list a relationship status on Facebook, regardless of my relationship status.

Nothing happened with this guy for you, so it is no biggie. I'm sure other people are interested in you. You'll find someone.

I don't post mine either, I think it says single because it has to say something... I think.... but in a way it's good that he did say it, because I'd rather hear it that way then after I go to the races Saturday to see him. Or be told by one of the 'friends' that "Oh....you didn't know????" I hate that.

porcelain_doll

I know this feeling. I haven't had it in a while, but I used to have it often in college. I had crushes on many, but it always turned out that they had girlfriends. I can remember one guy in particular that I had my eye on for the longest time, but was too scared to say much to him (big surprise there). It wasn't long after that when a friend told me he was dating someone, and within a year they were married. I wondered "what if" for a long time before I finally accepted that it was just fate taking its course.

Daisy_Cutter

I do not list a relationship status on Facebook, regardless of my relationship status.

Nothing happened with this guy for you, so it is no biggie. I'm sure other people are interested in you. You'll find someone.

^^^THIS! Never have...never will. Okay, maybe if I'm married.

christine24t

So....now I have that feeling of "Now What". That guys gone. Like when I read it, I wanted to literally kick myself, and I'm pretty sure I said "You fn dumb@ss....it's your own damn fault".

Hey, at least it's better finding out that way than not finding out at all. I had heard rumors this guy I liked was dating this other girl so I went on FB to look around, couldn't find anything notable. A month later I found out they were dating through word-of-mouth. I wished I found out earlier so I didn't look like a dumba$$ for flirting with him.

AnnaPixie

I would just tell myself that this guy wasn't right for me. :flowerforyou:

I believe in fate. I believe that everything happens for a reason and nothing happens before it's time!

If you can't be philosophical about it then pamper yourself and busy yourself with fun stuff. You really can't go crying buckets over a guy you dont know. He is probably an unreliable ****head! :bigsmile:

JanieJack

I do not list a relationship status on Facebook, regardless of my relationship status.

^^^THIS! Never have...never will. Okay, maybe if I'm married.

This is one area where me and a good friend differ strongly... his gf of 2 years (and he's talking about making this permanent) still is not listed as his gf on facebook. She seems to be fine with that. I, personally, wouldn't be...

ESPECIALLY in a relationship with someone like him: handsome, gregarious, a big flirt, wealthy, and has a ton of fb photos others have uploaded of him and other women grinding, partying, etc from previous years. If I were dating a man like that, I wouldn't want him to change who he is and how he relates to people, but I would want him to take advantages of as many avenues (such as relationship status on places like facebook) to delicately let others know he's in a relationship. Especially after 2 years.

I've known other women whose husbands/boyfriends were very gregarious and women often got the wrong perception. Fb status change won't stop him from straying or stop certain women from chasing, but it will stop your average woman who thinks his gentlemanly behavior is actually flirting.

TBH, when guys have told me they didn't want to tag me on fb (either as dating or in "relationship status") it's because I wasn't "the one." Most men who are totally into me can't wait to show me off. Most men in general, when they've met an amazing beautiful woman, can't wait to show her off.

ajball90

The same thing happened to me, except that it was my ex boyfriend. I have been trying so hard to get over him for sometime now, but every few weeks he would contact me, and the process would have to start all over again, so I'm looking at it as an opportunity to finally get over him. But it still sucks. And I ALWAYS have the "I'm going to be alone forever" thoughts. Just be confident in yourself and people will see that, and approach you. If you aren't confident in yourself, change that first (which is what I'm currently trying to do). Everytime I'm feeling like this, I just think of the quote "You can't expect someone to love you, if you don't love yourself" and that makes me feel a little bit better and a little more motivated.

christine24t

Read this and you won't feel so bad!!

http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2012/08/5-of-the-most-traumatically-aw.html