Most interesting online dating story
TheKitsune6
Posts: 5,798 Member
It goes without saying that online dating can be interesting in many possible ways. Let's go for something a bit fun here - share with us your most ridiculous/awesome/stupid/scary/any extreme thing story here!
One of my strangest ones:
It started off when I logged in to find a message where the guy didn't even make a pretense at getting to know me. All he offered was that he was interested and then went on to invite me to go over to his house for pizza and a movie. Obviously I went "STRANGER DANGER" and messaged him saying that I didn't feel comfortable meeting a stranger at his house.
His response perplexed me. He said that he wished he could take me out somewhere fancy or to the movies or something else equally awesome but that he couldn't. Filled with curiosity at this dramatic statement I had to ask him why none of these things could happen, what could make him resort to pizza and a movie? I thought maybe he was unemployed or had a phobia of public places. His answer was both shocking and cliche.
Turns out he's under house arrest because he was going over 155 miles per hour and didn't pull over when the cops tried to stop him. He said he didn't get a DUI or anything and he didn't do anything wrong it was just a mistake. Apparently in his world, going more than twice the speed limit is not doing anything wrong...
I then told him that even if he wasn't under house arrest I wouldn't go over to a strangers house, then I followed up with
"I have no interest in dating a guy that's currently under house arrest. I am curious why you would possibly run from the cops if you had nothing to run from - because that's what it sounds like you are saying which to me... seems deceptive. I don't think you're a bad guy, I think you did a stupid thing and now you're paying for it. Unfortunately that means that for now you miss out on dating me."
I did NOT expect this response either!
"And that's fine with me, because apparently you're extremely judgemental. you have no clue why i'm on house arrest and yet you think i'm being deceptive. no thanks. i'll find someone who isnt going to judge me before meeting me.
PS. i'm on house arrest because i ran from the cops in order to save the life of my ex-fiance. the judge didnt want to sentence me but his hands were tied. I got in trouble for doing the right thing, so sue me.
PSS. under no other circumstance would i ever ask you to meet me at my house, nor would i want you knowing where i live, however this is the only way i can meet new people."
He then rambled on about how the state doesn't have the right to take away his ability to date after which I promptly blocked him.
It's still my favorite story!
One of my strangest ones:
It started off when I logged in to find a message where the guy didn't even make a pretense at getting to know me. All he offered was that he was interested and then went on to invite me to go over to his house for pizza and a movie. Obviously I went "STRANGER DANGER" and messaged him saying that I didn't feel comfortable meeting a stranger at his house.
His response perplexed me. He said that he wished he could take me out somewhere fancy or to the movies or something else equally awesome but that he couldn't. Filled with curiosity at this dramatic statement I had to ask him why none of these things could happen, what could make him resort to pizza and a movie? I thought maybe he was unemployed or had a phobia of public places. His answer was both shocking and cliche.
Turns out he's under house arrest because he was going over 155 miles per hour and didn't pull over when the cops tried to stop him. He said he didn't get a DUI or anything and he didn't do anything wrong it was just a mistake. Apparently in his world, going more than twice the speed limit is not doing anything wrong...
I then told him that even if he wasn't under house arrest I wouldn't go over to a strangers house, then I followed up with
"I have no interest in dating a guy that's currently under house arrest. I am curious why you would possibly run from the cops if you had nothing to run from - because that's what it sounds like you are saying which to me... seems deceptive. I don't think you're a bad guy, I think you did a stupid thing and now you're paying for it. Unfortunately that means that for now you miss out on dating me."
I did NOT expect this response either!
"And that's fine with me, because apparently you're extremely judgemental. you have no clue why i'm on house arrest and yet you think i'm being deceptive. no thanks. i'll find someone who isnt going to judge me before meeting me.
PS. i'm on house arrest because i ran from the cops in order to save the life of my ex-fiance. the judge didnt want to sentence me but his hands were tied. I got in trouble for doing the right thing, so sue me.
PSS. under no other circumstance would i ever ask you to meet me at my house, nor would i want you knowing where i live, however this is the only way i can meet new people."
He then rambled on about how the state doesn't have the right to take away his ability to date after which I promptly blocked him.
It's still my favorite story!
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Replies
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WOW. I've heard some SAD state of affairs, but this one takes the cake.
I think the only thing that could beat his is a guy in jail asking for a "conjugal visit".
I'm glad you have the smarts to see through this guys BS.0 -
Wait. That was you?
--P0 -
Wait. That was you?
--P
WHOOPS! I was afraid this would happen! Hahaha0 -
This made me LOL so hard.. I seriously think you missed out on what could of been an amazing night.0
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What the... I don't even... wow. B|
I think my most interesting was a guy I agreed to meet at a coffee shop a couple years ago. Within an hour of meeting this dude, I had learned about his best friend tricking him into getting butt-raped by an old man in the back of a van, his ex-wife who used to scream "*kitten*" at him, and his new spiritual experience as a Jew. He then proceeded to invite me back to his home, which was in the middle of nowhere.
The best part was... he was awed and offended when I said "no." :]0 -
OK, this will sound so unusual that it's unbelievable, but it really was one of my first experiences with online dating a few years ago.
In those days I weighed over 250 lbs so I felt like I needed to use those sites meant for BBWs to feel comfortable. I couldn't even tell you what it was though. I saw a guy's picture, thought he was cute, but didn't say anything (typical of me). He wrote me a note, and we started chatting. We kept chatting for a couple of nights and then hit the weekend.
Sunday after church I got online and read a message from him asking me if we could chat more on the phone. I called and had the most BIZARRE conversation of my entire life.
His profile said he had kids, so I asked him how many. He said he has two but considers himself to have 4. I ask what he means. He tells me that his 2 kids are from his first marriage, but his second wife had a child that died during childbirth. I said that I can't even imagine how hard that was. He said that he was grateful because it qualified them to participate in a study to help his wife carry their next child to term. The second child was carried to full term but died after birth. I was trying to figure out what to say to such a tragic story, when he adds that the child died because of his wife's drug problem. He also adds that they lived in Utah at the time and that there was a law where she could be charged with murder so she was because the drugs caused the baby's death.
He goes on to tell me how bad things got between them while waiting for the trial, how she blamed him for not helping her, and then sends me a pic of him where she actually stabbed him, adding to her prison term. He tells me he moved to NC to get away from all that and start over. He shares how he got married again in NC but it hadn't worked either (I learned a lesson and asked no follow up questions). He also tells me that the ex's sentence is about over and she's getting out soon so he's hopeful that they will be cordial and doesn't still blame him.
He wraps up the chat saying he's glad I haven't run screaming yet and is hopeful that I'd like to continue to get to know him. I never had the heart to answer him back and didn't return his calls after that.
**I have no idea how accurate any of his statement on laws, etc.. are**0 -
OK, this will sound so unusual that it's unbelievable, but it really was one of my first experiences with online dating a few years ago.
In those days I weighed over 250 lbs so I felt like I needed to use those sites meant for BBWs to feel comfortable. I couldn't even tell you what it was though. I saw a guy's picture, thought he was cute, but didn't say anything (typical of me). He wrote me a note, and we started chatting. We kept chatting for a couple of nights and then hit the weekend.
Sunday after church I got online and read a message from him asking me if we could chat more on the phone. I called and had the most BIZARRE conversation of my entire life.
His profile said he had kids, so I asked him how many. He said he has two but considers himself to have 4. I ask what he means. He tells me that his 2 kids are from his first marriage, but his second wife had a child that died during childbirth. I said that I can't even imagine how hard that was. He said that he was grateful because it qualified them to participate in a study to help his wife carry their next child to term. The second child was carried to full term but died after birth. I was trying to figure out what to say to such a tragic story, when he adds that the child died because of his wife's drug problem. He also adds that they lived in Utah at the time and that there was a law where she could be charged with murder so she was because the drugs caused the baby's death.
He goes on to tell me how bad things got between them while waiting for the trial, how she blamed him for not helping her, and then sends me a pic of him where she actually stabbed him, adding to her prison term. He tells me he moved to NC to get away from all that and start over. He shares how he got married again in NC but it hadn't worked either (I learned a lesson and asked no follow up questions). He also tells me that the ex's sentence is about over and she's getting out soon so he's hopeful that they will be cordial and doesn't still blame him.
He wraps up the chat saying he's glad I haven't run screaming yet and is hopeful that I'd like to continue to get to know him. I never had the heart to answer him back and didn't return his calls after that.
**I have no idea how accurate any of his statement on laws, etc.. are**
O___O;; You didn't run screaming because you were too busy being frozen in shock!
That's heavy stuff man... He sounds like a catch.0 -
OK, this will sound so unusual that it's unbelievable, but it really was one of my first experiences with online dating a few years ago.
In those days I weighed over 250 lbs so I felt like I needed to use those sites meant for BBWs to feel comfortable. I couldn't even tell you what it was though. I saw a guy's picture, thought he was cute, but didn't say anything (typical of me). He wrote me a note, and we started chatting. We kept chatting for a couple of nights and then hit the weekend.
Sunday after church I got online and read a message from him asking me if we could chat more on the phone. I called and had the most BIZARRE conversation of my entire life.
His profile said he had kids, so I asked him how many. He said he has two but considers himself to have 4. I ask what he means. He tells me that his 2 kids are from his first marriage, but his second wife had a child that died during childbirth. I said that I can't even imagine how hard that was. He said that he was grateful because it qualified them to participate in a study to help his wife carry their next child to term. The second child was carried to full term but died after birth. I was trying to figure out what to say to such a tragic story, when he adds that the child died because of his wife's drug problem. He also adds that they lived in Utah at the time and that there was a law where she could be charged with murder so she was because the drugs caused the baby's death.
He goes on to tell me how bad things got between them while waiting for the trial, how she blamed him for not helping her, and then sends me a pic of him where she actually stabbed him, adding to her prison term. He tells me he moved to NC to get away from all that and start over. He shares how he got married again in NC but it hadn't worked either (I learned a lesson and asked no follow up questions). He also tells me that the ex's sentence is about over and she's getting out soon so he's hopeful that they will be cordial and doesn't still blame him.
He wraps up the chat saying he's glad I haven't run screaming yet and is hopeful that I'd like to continue to get to know him. I never had the heart to answer him back and didn't return his calls after that.
**I have no idea how accurate any of his statement on laws, etc.. are**
O___O;; You didn't run screaming because you were too busy being frozen in shock!
That's heavy stuff man... He sounds like a catch.
What gets me is that this guy has been married 3 times.0 -
What gets me is that this guy has been married 3 times.
I know, right?! I was stunned. If I'd been married three time, and had one of them stab me, I'd probably NOT be looking for number 4, haha!0 -
What gets me is that this guy has been married 3 times.
I know, right?! I was stunned. If I'd been married three time, and had one of them stab me, I'd probably NOT be looking for number 4, haha!
I guess.... but look at his options O_o;; I'll stay single0 -
I used to be a skip tracer by profession, and vetted every man I dated. After going on one date with a guy that turned out to be a registered sex offender (of course I found this out after our date, and not by him) I decided I'd rather be single than internet date. There's some scary *kitten* out there. :huh:0
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After reading these stories all I can do is think, What the hell am I doing wrong that I barely ever get a response to any messages I send.0
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After reading these stories all I can do is think, What the hell am I doing wrong that I barely ever get a response to any messages I send.
To be fair, I only responded to be him to say "no" and "What the hell??" respectively.0 -
Yowzas! All my online stories pale in comparison to the two big ones here! :laugh:0
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Yowzas! All my online stories pale in comparison to the two big ones here! :laugh:
Funny is as funny does! As long as it gets a chuckle! The point isn't to compare but to laugh!0 -
I just made a profile online and now I'm scared. Already the responses I've gotten are crazy. Ugggggh. I don't know if I can do this.0
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I just made a profile online and now I'm scared. Already the responses I've gotten are crazy. Ugggggh. I don't know if I can do this.
It helps to shaaaaaaaare!0 -
I just made a profile online and now I'm scared. Already the responses I've gotten are crazy. Ugggggh. I don't know if I can do this.
It helps to shaaaaaaaare!
Yes, Kit is right! But just remember that the wacky ones are waiting for newbies to sign up... if you can outlast them you'll probably see some of the more normal guys surface!0 -
After reading these stories all I can do is think, What the hell am I doing wrong that I barely ever get a response to any messages I send.
You could always title your profile "Living in a van down by the river".....Some chicks just really dig that. LMAO!0 -
Ok. .when this happened, I was tired of Match.com and had decided to quit, but I see this profile come up in my daily matches and it piques my interest a little. Still, I didn't really care that much so it was this completely random, stream of consciousness mess of an email jumbled with random thoughts about spilled drinks and me getting slapped in the face once etc. . It was funny, I have to admit, but not exactly your typical "I like your profile, let's meet for dinner" kind of thing. .
Anyway, she responds right away with something almost as crazy and now I know this girl is fun, so we go back and forth for the rest of the day and by afternoon we've exchanged numbers and we're texting and then talking and by midnight we're "Broken up" (her words. . lol). .
Anyway, we made up the next day and arranged a date.
The date was awesome, we went to this nice outdoor restaurant / bar and had dinner and some drinks, and we were really hitting it off, and actually making out. . Then she goes to the bathroom. She comes back and gets right up in my face and says "How could you possibly believe in God?" She proceeds to go off on how stupid I am for believing. . It was crazy! I'm just sort of sitting there grinning. I don't preach, and I NEVER once tried to bring this girl around (We'd briefly discussed religion on the phone a few days before). .But she's a devout atheist. . She HATES that I do believe and it's beyond her capacity to imagine why?! Smart people are NOT supposed to believe in God! So all of a sudden, our date is all screwed up and she says "That's it, I'm calling a cab". Well. . I don't feel right about that, so I convince her to let me take her to her car. . Then in the car, she continues to go off on me. I'm more perplexed and flabbergasted than anything. . I keep asking her why, as an atheist, does she care that much!?
Finally, we get back to my Apartment where her car is. . I'm walking her down the hall to her car when she basically grabs me and throws me up against the wall and starts kissing me!. . She then says: "Tell me there is no God and I'll *kitten* you!" . .
Of course I'm NOT going to renounce God. .under any circumstances. .. and now I'm thinking this girl is literally Satan! lol. . . but seriously, that's pretty direct! Still. . this was my first shot after my divorce so I still wanted to sleep with her. .I just wasn't willing to go to that length to get it. . Anyway, she finally says "Take me inside". . Well. . look. . I really didn't expect things to go this far. . so I had a babysitter inside with my son (my ex-wife! LOL). . So going inside wasn't an option. I say "My Son is in there". . She get's pissed and stomps off to her car. .I follow her. She gets in, opens the passenger door and says "Get in". . By now I've got my senses back and I'm like "uh. . nope". . So she drives off in a pissed off rage. .
So that was our first date.0 -
Ok. .when this happened, I was tired of Match.com and had decided to quit, but I see this profile come up in my daily matches and it piques my interest a little. Still, I didn't really care that much so it was this completely random, stream of consciousness mess of an email jumbled with random thoughts about spilled drinks and me getting slapped in the face once etc. . It was funny, I have to admit, but not exactly your typical "I like your profile, let's meet for dinner" kind of thing. .
Anyway, she responds right away with something almost as crazy and now I know this girl is fun, so we go back and forth for the rest of the day and by afternoon we've exchanged numbers and we're texting and then talking and by midnight we're "Broken up" (her words. . lol). .
Anyway, we made up the next day and arranged a date.
The date was awesome, we went to this nice outdoor restaurant / bar and had dinner and some drinks, and we were really hitting it off, and actually making out. . Then she goes to the bathroom. She comes back and gets right up in my face and says "How could you possibly believe in God?" She proceeds to go off on how stupid I am for believing. . It was crazy! I'm just sort of sitting there grinning. I don't preach, and I NEVER once tried to bring this girl around (We'd briefly discussed religion on the phone a few days before). .But she's a devout atheist. . She HATES that I do believe and it's beyond her capacity to imagine why?! Smart people are NOT supposed to believe in God! So all of a sudden, our date is all screwed up and she says "That's it, I'm calling a cab". Well. . I don't feel right about that, so I convince her to let me take her to her car. . Then in the car, she continues to go off on me. I'm more perplexed and flabbergasted than anything. . I keep asking her why, as an atheist, does she care that much!?
Finally, we get back to my Apartment where her car is. . I'm walking her down the hall to her car when she basically grabs me and throws me up against the wall and starts kissing me!. . She then says: "Tell me there is no God and I'll *kitten* you!" . .
Of course I'm NOT going to renounce God. .under any circumstances. .. and now I'm thinking this girl is literally Satan! lol. . . but seriously, that's pretty direct! Still. . this was my first shot after my divorce so I still wanted to sleep with her. .I just wasn't willing to go to that length to get it. . Anyway, she finally says "Take me inside". . Well. . look. . I really didn't expect things to go this far. . so I had a babysitter inside with my son (my ex-wife! LOL). . So going inside wasn't an option. I say "My Son is in there". . She get's pissed and stomps off to her car. .I follow her. She gets in, opens the passenger door and says "Get in". . By now I've got my senses back and I'm like "uh. . nope". . So she drives off in a pissed off rage. .
So that was our first date.
How was the second date?0 -
Even BETTER!0
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How was the second date?
Exactly what I was thinking, Kit?! It was clear there had to be a second date, haha...
She must have been REALLY hot or you really had gone a long time without ! :laugh:0 -
Ok. .when this happened, I was tired of Match.com and had decided to quit, but I see this profile come up in my daily matches and it piques my interest a little. Still, I didn't really care that much so it was this completely random, stream of consciousness mess of an email jumbled with random thoughts about spilled drinks and me getting slapped in the face once etc. . It was funny, I have to admit, but not exactly your typical "I like your profile, let's meet for dinner" kind of thing. .
Anyway, she responds right away with something almost as crazy and now I know this girl is fun, so we go back and forth for the rest of the day and by afternoon we've exchanged numbers and we're texting and then talking and by midnight we're "Broken up" (her words. . lol). .
Anyway, we made up the next day and arranged a date.
The date was awesome, we went to this nice outdoor restaurant / bar and had dinner and some drinks, and we were really hitting it off, and actually making out. . Then she goes to the bathroom. She comes back and gets right up in my face and says "How could you possibly believe in God?" She proceeds to go off on how stupid I am for believing. . It was crazy! I'm just sort of sitting there grinning. I don't preach, and I NEVER once tried to bring this girl around (We'd briefly discussed religion on the phone a few days before). .But she's a devout atheist. . She HATES that I do believe and it's beyond her capacity to imagine why?! Smart people are NOT supposed to believe in God! So all of a sudden, our date is all screwed up and she says "That's it, I'm calling a cab". Well. . I don't feel right about that, so I convince her to let me take her to her car. . Then in the car, she continues to go off on me. I'm more perplexed and flabbergasted than anything. . I keep asking her why, as an atheist, does she care that much!?
Finally, we get back to my Apartment where her car is. . I'm walking her down the hall to her car when she basically grabs me and throws me up against the wall and starts kissing me!. . She then says: "Tell me there is no God and I'll *kitten* you!" . .
Of course I'm NOT going to renounce God. .under any circumstances. .. and now I'm thinking this girl is literally Satan! lol. . . but seriously, that's pretty direct! Still. . this was my first shot after my divorce so I still wanted to sleep with her. .I just wasn't willing to go to that length to get it. . Anyway, she finally says "Take me inside". . Well. . look. . I really didn't expect things to go this far. . so I had a babysitter inside with my son (my ex-wife! LOL). . So going inside wasn't an option. I say "My Son is in there". . She get's pissed and stomps off to her car. .I follow her. She gets in, opens the passenger door and says "Get in". . By now I've got my senses back and I'm like "uh. . nope". . So she drives off in a pissed off rage. .
So that was our first date.
LOL, did you mean to post this here or on the Crazy Hot thread?
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Here's my worst one so far: After my divorce, I was tring to meet some new people and get back into dating so I signed up on POF. I read this guy's p[rofile and he sounded ok plus he was cute so I sent him a message. He sent a reply suggesting we meet right away. I should have been concerned but I hadn't dated in years so I said fine. At least I was smart enough to insist we meet at a Starbucks. When he showed up, he took one look at me and said "Yeah, you're good. There's a hotel close by, let's go" I then told him there was no way I was going to a hotel with him. At that point he started screaming at me in the middle of Starbucks about how all women play games, I led him on, etc. The manager had to come out and forcibly escort him out of the building. Of course, everyone in the place was staring at me so I just held up my hands and said "online dating. This is why we meet in Starbucks, right?!" Several people laughed. I got a tea and sat down for a bit just in case he might be waiting in the parking lot. It was pretty scary.0
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How was the second date?
Exactly what I was thinking, Kit?! It was clear there had to be a second date, haha...
She must have been REALLY hot or you really had gone a long time without ! :laugh:
Both!. . LOL. .0 -
Here's my worst one so far: After my divorce, I was tring to meet some new people and get back into dating so I signed up on POF. I read this guy's p[rofile and he sounded ok plus he was cute so I sent him a message. He sent a reply suggesting we meet right away. I should have been concerned but I hadn't dated in years so I said fine. At least I was smart enough to insist we meet at a Starbucks. When he showed up, he took one look at me and said "Yeah, you're good. There's a hotel close by, let's go" I then told him there was no way I was going to a hotel with him. At that point he started screaming at me in the middle of Starbucks about how all women play games, I led him on, etc. The manager had to come out and forcibly escort him out of the building. Of course, everyone in the place was staring at me so I just held up my hands and said "online dating. This is why we meet in Starbucks, right?!" Several people laughed. I got a tea and sat down for a bit just in case he might be waiting in the parking lot. It was pretty scary.
That's insane! I think if you do online dating you need to pay (i.e. avoid POF). . even a few bucks a month keeps the rif-raf out. . lol.0 -
Here's my worst one so far: After my divorce, I was tring to meet some new people and get back into dating so I signed up on POF. I read this guy's p[rofile and he sounded ok plus he was cute so I sent him a message. He sent a reply suggesting we meet right away. I should have been concerned but I hadn't dated in years so I said fine. At least I was smart enough to insist we meet at a Starbucks. When he showed up, he took one look at me and said "Yeah, you're good. There's a hotel close by, let's go" I then told him there was no way I was going to a hotel with him. At that point he started screaming at me in the middle of Starbucks about how all women play games, I led him on, etc. The manager had to come out and forcibly escort him out of the building. Of course, everyone in the place was staring at me so I just held up my hands and said "online dating. This is why we meet in Starbucks, right?!" Several people laughed. I got a tea and sat down for a bit just in case he might be waiting in the parking lot. It was pretty scary.
Wow, that's mortifying! :noway:0 -
Of course, everyone in the place was staring at me so I just held up my hands and said "online dating. This is why we meet in Starbucks, right?!" Several people laughed. I got a tea and sat down for a bit just in case he might be waiting in the parking lot. It was pretty scary.
You handled that like such a champ I would have come and sat with you to chat (and escorted you to your car because I totally get being freaked out that he might be waiting).0 -
Hilarious! :laugh:"online dating. This is why we meet in Starbucks, right?!"
This guy probably tried to pressure you, glad you resisted his little manipulation.0
