Getting better :-/ but really unhappy need help :(

AdrianneAleece20

After years and years of ups and downs I have finally decided enough is enough, no more lies no more bad habits just time to get healthy and it was great at first all the things I wanted, eating breakfast with my boyfriend going out for lunch and then a few weeks later I looked in the mirror and I hate it, it's horrible this isn't attractive, I am the unhappiest I've ever been and I don't know why :-/ I can feel myself starting to slip and tbh I don't want to add guilt and failure to how crappy I already feel :-/ just dunno what to do need help

tashaa1992

Going through recovery isn't easy, as I'm sure you know but even after all the tears and slip ups I'm sure you realise it is worth it, just to be free. Are you just starting out in your recovery journey? Are you seeing a counsellor? I don't know you, I don't know what you look like other than from what I see of you from your picture, but body dismorphia is almost always linked to eating disorders and depression, and I'm not a doctor but my guess is you are suffering from bdd. What you see in the mirror isn't real, it's a mental thing and the only way to recover from it is to get help for it.
Going back to the ed won't make you happy, you know that, it's why you decided to recover isn't it? Keep going, and please please talk to someone, I'm also here if you need anything. Only you can save yourself, remember that, keep fighting xxx