Gluten-Free Kids Stealing Non Gluten-Free Food

TheGlen

Hello,

My wife, kids and I try to follow the primal blueprint as much as possible. We are all on a strict "no wheat/gluten" diet, and although my wife and I still eat some dairy, our kids don't have any (this was suggested by the doctor/allergist for both my daughter, who has severe asthma, and our son who has adhd/tourettes).

Over the last few months, we have seen a steady increase in the symptoms that had subsided when we moved to the primal blueprint (ticks, behaviour, etc), but we were at a loss to explain them. We had been assuming it was to do with his age, or possibly an increase in weight not being accounted for with his medication.

It has just came to our attention that our 11 y/o son has been stealing dairy from the fridge (milk/cheese) and eating the "healthy snacks" his school provides for the children in the afternoons (cereal, crackers, granola bars, cheese, etc). As well, he has been stealing cookies and crackers when staying at his Dad's house every other weekend (they adhere to his diet when he is there, but have several items in their house that contain wheat/gluten for when he is not there). We only just realized this was going on, as he started to take more and more each week.

He's 11 years old, it's not like we can put the food out of his reach. There is no way we can watch him 24 hours a day to make sure he isn't eating food he knows is bad for him, and honestly, at 11 years old we shouldn't have to. We've talked to him, but are finding it hard to trust him now (this has been going on for months).

Is anyone else dealing with this type of challenge? Does anyone have any suggestions other than, "talk to him and make him understand why he shouldn't eat this food"?


Thanks, Glen

AlsDonkBoxSquat

I make and buy gluten free equivalents for all food for my son. He's 3, he doesn't understand he can't have what the other kids have so I the school schedule and everyday he gets sent to school with all the exact same things that he would be eating if he didn't have these issues. It's important to me that he doesn't identify with being different because the last thing kids want is to be different. Ask the school to work with you on delivery to make sure that's even the same. (They even have diary free veggie cheese, but you could look into seeing if goat cheese is okay and it's only the cow cheese he has issues with). Even if you can have it, remove anything from your house he can't have and ask his dad to do the same when he's visiting. He's 10, and this is a complex issue, and all kids care about is "I don't want to be different, and I want THaT." Or trying to accept why everyone else can do something and they can't. Everyone's going o have to live it, and you're going to have to start getting creative.

monicalosesweight

I'd look for stuff that's similar in taste and start providing it so he has access even at dad's. Dad needs to have snacks that he can eat and which will draw his attention away from the wheat. In other words, find alternatives.

I know they make some great snacks like Rice Works which are delicious and he won't feel like he's losing out if he can have those as snacks. I bet the other kids will want them too.

As for cheese, that's tougher because he's taking it out of your fridge. It might be easier to go cold turkey and have everyone on a dairy free diet. That way, he gets used to it. Also, he'll feel like he's not alone in this adventure. I'd look at other cheese options and see if any of them appeal.

I've recently read about Camel milk. I'm not sure if it's any good but this is a link to a farm that sells the powder version of the milk. It may be at least an entertaining option for him.

Monica

http://www.cameldairy.com/

TheGlen

I make and buy gluten free equivalents for all food for my son. He's 3, he doesn't understand he can't have what the other kids have so I the school schedule and everyday he gets sent to school with all the exact same things that he would be eating if he didn't have these issues. It's important to me that he doesn't identify with being different because the last thing kids want is to be different. Ask the school to work with you on delivery to make sure that's even the same. (They even have diary free veggie cheese, but you could look into seeing if goat cheese is okay and it's only the cow cheese he has issues with). Even if you can have it, remove anything from your house he can't have and ask his dad to do the same when he's visiting. He's 10, and this is a complex issue, and all kids care about is "I don't want to be different, and I want THaT." Or trying to accept why everyone else can do something and they can't. Everyone's going o have to live it, and you're going to have to start getting creative.

Thanks for your response. I understand about not wanting to make him feel different; unfortunately though, he is different (even eating healthy food will make him "different" in most classrooms). If you looked at his lunch though, it wouldn't immediately stand out as being different from the other kids. We often send him with organic fruits/vegetables, salad with some sort of meat or soup (so I don't think there is a fear of feeling "different"). I think he just wanted something he can't have, so he took it.

I haven't yet, but I'm going to ask that the school stop offering our son food. We spend time and money providing him with healthy food/snacks, and I almost feel like they are undermining our efforts by offering him high sugar and gluten laden foods.

Unfortunately it's the casein we are avoiding, so it's all milk/dairy that we need to avoid for him (even goat's cheese).

As far as removing everything from our house (and his Dad's) that he can't eat is something I would consider, but to be honest I don't know that it would make a difference...and I really feel we shouldn't have to do this for someone who is almost 12. For a toddler or very young child, maybe, but someone who is 12 should be able to resist just taking food when they aren't supposed to. I guess the problem is twofold; he shouldn't be eating food full of gluten or dairy, and he shouldn't be just taking food without asking. Even if he was only stealing gluten/dairy free foods, it would still be a problem in my mind, that he is sneaking off and taking stuff out of the cupboard/fridge/pantry without asking or anyone knowing. As an example, if we have gluten free chips in the pantry, he shouldn't feel that he can just go in there and take them if he wants (even if they don't have gluten in them).

Thanks for your suggestions; I'll make sure to bring them up at our next family discussion to see what everyone else thinks.

TheGlen

I'd look for stuff that's similar in taste and start providing it so he has access even at dad's. Dad needs to have snacks that he can eat and which will draw his attention away from the wheat. In other words, find alternatives.

I know they make some great snacks like Rice Works which are delicious and he won't feel like he's losing out if he can have those as snacks. I bet the other kids will want them too.

As for cheese, that's tougher because he's taking it out of your fridge. It might be easier to go cold turkey and have everyone on a dairy free diet. That way, he gets used to it. Also, he'll feel like he's not alone in this adventure. I'd look at other cheese options and see if any of them appeal.

I've recently read about Camel milk. I'm not sure if it's any good but this is a link to a farm that sells the powder version of the milk. It may be at least an entertaining option for him.

Monica

http://www.cameldairy.com/

It's not like our kids don't have snacks/treats. They always have an assortment of fruits/vegetables. As well, we usually get them carob treats or coconut type cookies around the holidays. Rice (and soy) is something our whole family avoids, as it's a food we don't consider to be healthy/nutritious (according to the primal blueprint...although I don't want to hijack my own post by opening up that can of worms).

I'd never heard of drinking camel milk, but I see that some people say it has less casein in it. I also see it's $101 for "21, 8 oz cups of milk", so I don't see it happening anytime soon (lol).

Thanks for your comments.

momof8munchkins

I am having the same issue.. I have celiac disease. 6 out of 8 kids are displaying the same symtoms.We have to eat gluten , grain ,dairy, soy and legume free.. most of them accept our special diet very well because their physcal symptoms are very severe when they veer off .. but 2 of our children are resisting.. they are 8 and 12.. At home there is very little for them to get into since everyone but my husband eat this way. We homeschool so school is not a problem..Church and potlucks is where we have issues.. the 8 year old wIll get cookies,donuts or pretzels..then spend two days throwing up and laying around holding her stomach because she is in such pain.. You would think this alone would be enough to deter her but it isn't. The 12 year doesn't have the stomach issues..but if affects her mood and attitude in a very bad way.. we've had to take extra steps to keep them from getting the food they shouldn't We have talked to their teachers at church .. basically we have told them "DON"T LET THEM HAVE ANYTHING!" and we provide their snacks.. at dinners we make these two children stick close to us, Keeping a kid safe at an ex's house has to be hard if his dad is not on board.. but if he is..maybe he can lock up the unsafe food when his son is there. Public school is a whole other arena..obviously he takes his lunch but getting him to not get treats from his class mates..that is a tough one.. especially when you are dealing adhd..maybe you set up a reward system for when he resists the 'bad' food.. like extra time on the computer or tv or a certain amount of money earned and at the end of a period of time he can buy a new toy or game.. I know bribery is not always wise but when you are dealing special needs kids you have to whatever you have to do to keep them safe and healthy. If all else fails I would get a class list and call the parents and just explain how important it is that their child not share there food with him and hope they can explain to the kids themselves. good luck

momof8munchkins

my husband still eats a regular diet he has no phsyical symptoms and doesn't feel the need to give it up.. Though it would really make all of our lives easier if he would at least stop bringing unsafe food into the house period ..but that is another discussion,
So we bought a min-fridge for our bedroom and a small cabinet for his food.. there he keeps his nutty bars and cheese that he can't seem to live without. it helps keep the kids out of it. it,s harder for them to get to..But if you and your wife are willing it would be much simplier all the way around if the whole family ate the same way..and there was no food in the house that the kids cannot eat.

mooglysmom

Well, he *should* be able to exert some self-control, but gluten is so addictive. Once you eat that little bit, you want more. And more. And so on. His Dad might have to lock up the stuff he shouldn't have, maybe? And there's tons of dairy free milk choices (like Almond and coconut milk, which you can make yourself too). My 7 year old knows better than to eat something that hasn't been approved - he's possibly Celiac and severely allergic to dairy. It's been drilled into his head time and time again. He also has Autism and ADHD, but I have read that as he gets older its harder to keep control on that. Good luck, hope you figure something out.

monicalosesweight

I know that I have a wheat allergy and being a kid and trying to keep yourself from eating something isn't always possible. Trust me, it took becoming an adult to learn that kind of self- restraint. If he's taking it without asking, it's because he doesn't want to be gluten free and will most likely try again. I would try locking up hubbies foods in a locked pantry.

The other part of this is that maybe your son is experiencing a growth spurt (or doing some sort of physical activity) or may need more food? Have you calculated the calories he's eating? I know you wouldn't intentionally not feed him enough but I thought that growth spurts sometimes cause hunger as boys sorta develop faster. You could count the calories and ask the doctor if he's eating enough - if not - than maybe increase his calories so he's not so hungry. I know my nephew went through a period where we'd practically fight with him to eat and suddenly he had a growth spurt and it feels like I've seen his plate triple in size because he's eating a huge quantity. It seems to vary ever few months...massive hunger....less hunger....tons of hunger. Weird. I think boys develop at spurts so that's the only thing I can think of that might cause him to eat more.

Please don't be offended....I was just thinking about my nephew and his sudden 2 to 3 inch growth spurt and his rush on the dinner plate which is why it came to mind.

TheGlen

Well, he *should* be able to exert some self-control, but gluten is so addictive. Once you eat that little bit, you want more. And more. And so on. His Dad might have to lock up the stuff he shouldn't have, maybe? And there's tons of dairy free milk choices (like Almond and coconut milk, which you can make yourself too). My 7 year old knows better than to eat something that hasn't been approved - he's possibly Celiac and severely allergic to dairy. It's been drilled into his head time and time again. He also has Autism and ADHD, but I have read that as he gets older its harder to keep control on that. Good luck, hope you figure something out.

Now that they know he has been taking food (at his Dad's), they are going to move as much as they can out of his reach (although it's not like there are many places he can't get to if he really tries). We have dairy free alternatives for the kids, both almond and coconut milk, but my wife still likes her milk for when she treats herself a latte once in awhile.

I think I've come to terms with the fact that it will nearly impossible to stop him from eating the food if he wants to; we can't watch him all the time (and away from home). During one of our recent conversations, our son said he "didn't really believe" that the special diet was necessary, or that it helped him with his issues. I think we might focus our efforts on convincing him it's important to eat this way and making him feel like it will make a difference.

With that in mind, does anyone know any good books for early teenagers (something similar to wheat belly, but for kids or something)?

TheGlen

I know that I have a wheat allergy and being a kid and trying to keep yourself from eating something isn't always possible. Trust me, it took becoming an adult to learn that kind of self- restraint. If he's taking it without asking, it's because he doesn't want to be gluten free and will most likely try again. I would try locking up hubbies foods in a locked pantry.

The other part of this is that maybe your son is experiencing a growth spurt (or doing some sort of physical activity) or may need more food? Have you calculated the calories he's eating? I know you wouldn't intentionally not feed him enough but I thought that growth spurts sometimes cause hunger as boys sorta develop faster. You could count the calories and ask the doctor if he's eating enough - if not - than maybe increase his calories so he's not so hungry. I know my nephew went through a period where we'd practically fight with him to eat and suddenly he had a growth spurt and it feels like I've seen his plate triple in size because he's eating a huge quantity. It seems to vary ever few months...massive hunger....less hunger....tons of hunger. Weird. I think boys develop at spurts so that's the only thing I can think of that might cause him to eat more.

Please don't be offended....I was just thinking about my nephew and his sudden 2 to 3 inch growth spurt and his rush on the dinner plate which is why it came to mind.

We can lock up the food, but as I said, he's capable of getting it somewhere else if he really wants it (or in most cases getting into where ever we lock it up).

As for being hungry, I don't think that's the issue (although I can understand why you might think/wonder that). We always make sure he has plenty of food readily available to him (fruit, veggies, nuts...and we never say no to snacks). We let the kids eat as much as they can/want, and with both of them being thin, we've never been concerned about them over eating.

pdworkman

Yup. We had to have a completely gluten-free household (he would even sneak into the basement with a can opener to open a can of cream of mushroom soup and eat it cold). And he would sneak food at other people's houses. It took at least two years before he realized that it wasn't worth it, that it made him sicker and made him behave in ways that were unacceptable. Now it's been about four years, and there are still occasions when he will sneak a bit of gluten - but not dairy - at his friend's houses. It doesn't help that his dad goes out and sneaks gluten when he's stressed!

little_miss_panda

There was a programme on Channel 4 called the Food Hospital last week which had an item on a teen with ADHD who went on a special diet and his symptoms improved, there was also a celiac kid on there. It's on Channel 4 on demand, or 4OD. They feature lots of children on there so it might be worth watching some of the episodes with your son to show him he isn't alone in needing a special diet. And I do agree that if you go dairy free as a household, perhaps just temporarily to show support, that might help, as he is currently seeing you guys eat foods he is "deprived" of.

jus_in_bello

Have you thought about letting him eat how he wants to for a month and feel the difference?

Also, if it is so important to you why don't you keep a house that is "safe" for him and get ride of the dairy all together.

From what you said about what you pack them for lunches, unless lunch has changes *A LOT* since I was in school he absolutely is eating differently than his peers. Is there a reason for them being grainfree, that is a huge change to make for a child and may hinder his body's ability to digest grain as an adult if he doesn't want to adhere to a life style decision you and your wife made for him. Maybe try simply being gluten free for him with GF bread and treats (I was entirely egg and dairy free in addition to my gluten free-ness and used only honey and agave nectar in baking for a year).

Mamacass13

I make and buy gluten free equivalents for all food for my son. He's 3, he doesn't understand he can't have what the other kids have so I the school schedule and everyday he gets sent to school with all the exact same things that he would be eating if he didn't have these issues. It's important to me that he doesn't identify with being different because the last thing kids want is to be different. Ask the school to work with you on delivery to make sure that's even the same. (They even have diary free veggie cheese, but you could look into seeing if goat cheese is okay and it's only the cow cheese he has issues with). Even if you can have it, remove anything from your house he can't have and ask his dad to do the same when he's visiting. He's 10, and this is a complex issue, and all kids care about is "I don't want to be different, and I want THaT." Or trying to accept why everyone else can do something and they can't. Everyone's going o have to live it, and you're going to have to start getting creative.

Thanks for your response. I understand about not wanting to make him feel different; unfortunately though, he is different (even eating healthy food will make him "different" in most classrooms). If you looked at his lunch though, it wouldn't immediately stand out as being different from the other kids. We often send him with organic fruits/vegetables, salad with some sort of meat or soup (so I don't think there is a fear of feeling "different"). I think he just wanted something he can't have, so he took it.

I haven't yet, but I'm going to ask that the school stop offering our son food. We spend time and money providing him with healthy food/snacks, and I almost feel like they are undermining our efforts by offering him high sugar and gluten laden foods.

Unfortunately it's the casein we are avoiding, so it's all milk/dairy that we need to avoid for him (even goat's cheese).

As far as removing everything from our house (and his Dad's) that he can't eat is something I would consider, but to be honest I don't know that it would make a difference...and I really feel we shouldn't have to do this for someone who is almost 12. For a toddler or very young child, maybe, but someone who is 12 should be able to resist just taking food when they aren't supposed to. I guess the problem is twofold; he shouldn't be eating food full of gluten or dairy, and he shouldn't be just taking food without asking. Even if he was only stealing gluten/dairy free foods, it would still be a problem in my mind, that he is sneaking off and taking stuff out of the cupboard/fridge/pantry without asking or anyone knowing. As an example, if we have gluten free chips in the pantry, he shouldn't feel that he can just go in there and take them if he wants (even if they don't have gluten in them).

Thanks for your suggestions; I'll make sure to bring them up at our next family discussion to see what everyone else thinks.

Being 12 would make this the hardest adventure ever....he's not an adult and does not understand (truly) why food is the enemy. He's probably going thru a really really tough time with this. I know how hard it is for me, I can't imagine being his age and having to go deal with this. First things first, I would get it all out of the house.