I need advise!

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reneelee
reneelee Posts: 877 Member
I have got to get this off my chest. Four years ago I was going to buy my grandfathers truck, he wanted my husband to have it, because Bill and I were the ones that helped them out on a regular basis and showed him respect. My grandmother said I could start taking over the payments, because grandpa is in VA nursing home and not getting out.
Two weeks later my Uncle flies in town and wants to put a bid on the truck. He calls me right before he was to go to the airport and tells me he is concerned about grandmas finances and has put a bid on the truck, he wants to now if I still want the truck. I say yes I do, knowing full well that I don’t want anything to do with the truck, since grandma would rather give it to her favorite person in the world. I said yes so he would have to leave the truck fly home and come back for it at a later date. Probably a ****ty move on my part, but I have to say it felt good. Also FYI Grandma has no financial concerns.
Christmas since 1990 has be held at my house and I did the majority of the cooking, because I love homemade food and I love to serve others. But after the truck incident in 2007 I have had lonely Christmas I have become cut off from the family, because no one got the truck and my Uncle could not face me, my uncle is an alcoholic and if anyone knows an alcoholic you know they do no wrong and never apologize.
So they started having grandma come have Christmas at their house.
This year my Uncle and Aunt are coming to have Christmas here.
So my question is do I go over to my grammas house for a visit?
I will not have them in my home. I feel like I have been punished, because I stud up for our selves and we where cut off from the family for the past 6 years was my punishment.
This makes me not want to be around them, because I’m the type of person that you would not be able to black mail, because I would end the threat by simply telling on myself. I don’t take scare tactic or threats. I don’t allow others to control me.

Replies

  • icimani
    icimani Posts: 1,454 Member
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    Families! Ya gotta love 'em. ....or do you?

    I think the question is - what will make you feel better? I get that you don't want to feel controlled, but this is your decision. Would you feel better seing your Grandma?
  • reneelee
    reneelee Posts: 877 Member
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    Thank you! I have given it moer thought and if I decide to see my Uncle and cousin it will be at a restaurant. I live by my grandma and spend time with her once every two weeks. Before this fallig out happend I used to see her three times a week. So I'm choosing to limit the time I spend with her.