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soooo....... an update

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4themoney
4themoney Posts: 797 Member
in Social Groups
last weekend, had those two great dates.
then he kinda fell off the grid. i attempted one time to contact him and his response was a couple words....
then i didn't hear from him for like 3 days. so, i assumed that meant disinterest. i did NOT contact him past asking him about his grandma.

THEN on day 4, he sends a quick text, i responded. asked him a question and i did NOT hear back.
like 6 hrs later he sends another short text. i responded. he texts again, i respond. i make a comment about my kids all being asleep and BAM, phone rings.

it's him. i answered and was cheerful and pleasant :-)
we ended up talking for over 2.5 hrs!
it was a great conversation!

next day, he sends a quick text in the afternoon. then another before practice started. then a couple more while he was working on getting his kids in bed. then he called, again!! we ended up talking for almost 2 hrs!!!

yesterday, he texted once or twice and was basically expressing an interest in seeing me. we both have our kids this weekend though, so it wasn't like he could ask me on a date and have me accept. but, we ended up working something out, and i was able to see him for a little while last night after my kids went to bed.

he even stopped and bought me a diet coke :-) ( i was dying for one and couldn't go out and get one for myself, LOL!!)

so, as of last night he seemed interested. i know i am!!! one day at a time, and we'll see where this ends up going :-)

thanks!
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Replies

  • jenbit
    jenbit Posts: 4,289 Member
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    Well since he seems interested maybe he was telling the truth about his grandma
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
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    I always knew this guy hadn't poofed!! I dunno, you gotta have more faith 4themoney. Men think in boxes. If he's distracted with things like work/sickness/money/etc. you're not going to be uppermost in his mind.....but that phone call made it all right with you, or so he thought :flowerforyou:
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    yeah, he was. we talked about it. i mean, he had been so honest and forth coming about so many other things! like i said, the good, the bad, and the UGLY!!!

    he told me when he called that he knew his schedule sucked ( and really it's fine because it's no worse than my own schedule!!!) and that he was thinking about me, and he didn't want me to think he wasn't interested.....
    Well since he seems interested maybe he was telling the truth about his grandma

    anna, i wish i had your confidence. :-) i guess i worry because i am not the girl that " puts out" easily. ya know? and since i don't have a ton of flexibility in my life i figure that i am not the best choice.

    not to mention, my mother is ALWAYS telling me that NO guy is going to be interested in me. she tells me that pretty much every time i talk to her. i try not to listen to her, but it's always sitting there, in my head......
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
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    anna, i wish i had your confidence. :-) i guess i worry because i am not the girl that " puts out" easily. ya know? and since i don't have a ton of flexibility in my life i figure that i am not the best choice.

    I understand. And I'm not the most confident either. We all have doubts about our catch-ability! Not helped by all the comments on here when you have men saying that you need to be under 30, childless, tall, big boobs, blah blah blah!! :grumble: It's enough to knock anyone's self esteem!

    But, I do know that if someone 'poof's then you just dont hear from them....... I'm not saying that this guy will be around for ever, all I'm saying is that he didnt poof on that day.......lol
    not to mention, my mother is ALWAYS telling me that NO guy is going to be interested in me. she tells me that pretty much every time i talk to her. i try not to listen to her, but it's always sitting there, in my head......

    Jeez!! People never cease to amaze me!! Why the hell do we have to say horrible things to each other?? Is it just a case of making herself feel better?? Or is she just a negative/bitter lady??

    Isn't there enough *kitten* in the world to contend with without someone putting the knife in and then twisting it!! :explode: I'm not saying we should delude anyone, but holy God, can't we just be nice?
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    eh, my mom has always been like that she is who she is. like i said, i TRY not to let it actually sink in and get to me. but, sometimes it's there, in the back. and it doesn't help when most guys seem to come off as only interested in sex.

    i know, i need to make sure i give people the benefit of the doubt ;-)
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
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    my mother is ALWAYS telling me that NO guy is going to be interested in me. she tells me that pretty much every time i talk to her. i try not to listen to her, but it's always sitting there, in my head......

    Ugh! I hate to hear this!! My heart hurts for you. When I called off my engagement (to my now ex), my mom told me that no one else would ever like me and better marry him so I wouldn't be old and alone. I figured "mother knows best" and went ahead and married him.

    But you know what? She was wrong!! I'm no longer married, but I'm certainly not alone. And the worst part is, because he offended her for all those years we were married, she has forgotten how much she used to love him and now denies ever pushing me into marrying him.

    Moral of the story: Don't listen to your mom. She's wrong. I don't know WHY she would say something like that to her own daughter, but that's HER mental/emotional/whatever issue. Don't make it YOUR issue too.
  • Katefab26
    Katefab26 Posts: 865
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    Yay!!! Sounds like a good new prospect!

    And, I have no idea why parents say stuff like that. When I was in high school my dad told me guys were never going to like me because guys don't like fat girls. The wonders that did to my self-confidence... :frown:
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    well, he blew me off again today......
    no phone call or explanation of any kind this time.
  • TheKitsune6
    TheKitsune6 Posts: 5,798 Member
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    well, he blew me off again today......
    no phone call or explanation of any kind this time.

    Did you have plans?
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    we did. for tonight. just like last sunday.
    well, he blew me off again today......
    no phone call or explanation of any kind this time.

    Did you have plans?
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
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    No more.
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    no more?

    care to elaborate? :-)
    No more.
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    I think DM is saying no more chances.

    I agree. Next!
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    ohhh, yeah. totally agree with that!! :-)

    there is no next. i'm done trying to do this.

    i told carl last night, that if this didn't pan out i was quitting.

    being alone is better than dealing with other people's cr@p. :-)
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
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    I think DM is saying no more chances.

    I agree. Next!

    That is what I was saying. No more chances. Seems like that is what you are going to do.
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    yeah.

    i went on match, and he's on there, LOL! has been for a little while now. so, apparently something went down that turned him off.

    i guess i don't understand the whole " standing someone up" "blowing someone off" thing. why not just call and cancel???

    then again, i guess if you decide not to ever see someone again you don't really care what they think of you, right???
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
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    They can't keep doing you wrong if you don't keep letting them.
  • 4themoney
    4themoney Posts: 797 Member
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    what am i doing wrong?


    They can't keep doing you wrong if you don't keep letting them.
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    yeah.

    i went on match, and he's on there, LOL! has been for a little while now. so, apparently something went down that turned him off.

    i guess i don't understand the whole " standing someone up" "blowing someone off" thing. why not just call and cancel???

    then again, i guess if you decide not to ever see someone again you don't really care what they think of you, right???

    Yes, I'm a poofer myself and once I've lost interest, I could care less what they think of me. If they were super sweet I might feel guilty for half a second but that's just part of the dating game, and it goes both ways.
  • MikeM53082
    MikeM53082 Posts: 1,199 Member
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    yeah.

    i went on match, and he's on there, LOL! has been for a little while now. so, apparently something went down that turned him off.

    i guess i don't understand the whole " standing someone up" "blowing someone off" thing. why not just call and cancel???

    then again, i guess if you decide not to ever see someone again you don't really care what they think of you, right???

    It all goes back to the one thread about poofing or "pulling a Houdini".

    I think poofing is OK if you've just been on 1 or 2 dates. It's still the beginning stages and neither of you owe each other a reason on why you want to stop dating each other.

    We've all been there.. I've had great first dates and all of a sudden, she poofs on me. I'm disappointed at first, then just put it all in perspective. It was a first date and she doesn't owe me anything. She said what she needed to say by poofing.. and I got her message loud and clear.

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