Met the old-fashioned way
kimi131
Posts: 1,058 Member
Met a guy about three years ago. Started becoming friends about a year ago and became better and better friends, and now it's safe to say that we're dating. It was slow-going at first. I think we were both trying to gauge if the other one felt the same way without jeopardizing the friendship.
We've been on a few dates, but only one "real" one. Because he knows my family well, we attend church together, and I've gotten to know his, most of our dates have involved one of our families or, as in the case of our first date, church members who didn't realize it was a first date and asked us to sit with them :laugh: . (Our second date, was in fact, his family Christmas). Our one "real" date was dinner and a movie and then hanging out on my couch until 3 am. I must say, really a great date - so easy and natural, more like hanging out with a boyfriend of several months than a date.
Now we send the sweetest text messages to each other (almost sickeningly sweet). Phone calls are easy and fun. Before our "real" date, there were times when it felt like we were already a couple. Like we got to skip a few of the steps because we already knew each other so well. It feels like that even more now. I kinda wonder if we already are and I just don't know it :laugh: .
It's been a longggggg time since I've dated someone that I didn't meet online and, I must admit, it's kind of refreshing. (Not knocking online dating, I've done more than enough of it, just seems like this way is more natural).
I do worry though that we're moving too fast. It was so slow getting to this point, but now that we're here, things have really moved quickly. I worry about it burning out. I had one of those relationships (but met him online) and it was magic while it lasted, but it was gone as immediately as it started. I really don't want that to happen this time around.
Do I have anything to worry about, or is it normal for this kind of relationship to just progress faster since there is an established history? I know every relationship is different, but I'm curious if anybody else has experience with this kind of situation.
We've been on a few dates, but only one "real" one. Because he knows my family well, we attend church together, and I've gotten to know his, most of our dates have involved one of our families or, as in the case of our first date, church members who didn't realize it was a first date and asked us to sit with them :laugh: . (Our second date, was in fact, his family Christmas). Our one "real" date was dinner and a movie and then hanging out on my couch until 3 am. I must say, really a great date - so easy and natural, more like hanging out with a boyfriend of several months than a date.
Now we send the sweetest text messages to each other (almost sickeningly sweet). Phone calls are easy and fun. Before our "real" date, there were times when it felt like we were already a couple. Like we got to skip a few of the steps because we already knew each other so well. It feels like that even more now. I kinda wonder if we already are and I just don't know it :laugh: .
It's been a longggggg time since I've dated someone that I didn't meet online and, I must admit, it's kind of refreshing. (Not knocking online dating, I've done more than enough of it, just seems like this way is more natural).
I do worry though that we're moving too fast. It was so slow getting to this point, but now that we're here, things have really moved quickly. I worry about it burning out. I had one of those relationships (but met him online) and it was magic while it lasted, but it was gone as immediately as it started. I really don't want that to happen this time around.
Do I have anything to worry about, or is it normal for this kind of relationship to just progress faster since there is an established history? I know every relationship is different, but I'm curious if anybody else has experience with this kind of situation.
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Replies
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I don't speak from experience but as an outsider looking in, considering the history of friendship, I wouldn't think anything of you two moving faster than an average relationship. It's much different when you know the man first.0
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You've known him for 3 years, so I don't think you're going too fast. If anything it seems like you're moving too slow.0
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I think you are reading to much into it. Just enjoy each other - putting labels on stuff and wondering if it's too fast or too slow makes a relationship hard. Relationships should be fun.0
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Nope, not too fast.
I'd be concerned about a transition from the friend zone to romance. A very difficult transition to make. This is why my female friends who are single are women that I am not physically attracted to.0 -
Nope, not too fast.
I'd be concerned about a transition from the friend zone to romance. A very difficult transition to make. This is why my female friends who are single are women that I am not physically attracted to.
It's a downright miracle neither one of you had permanently friend-zoned each other yet.0 -
Enjoy the ride, enjoy each moment. I am happy for you : )0
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Do what feels natural. If you two both want to spend lots of time together - then do it. If you two both want to slow down - then do it. Do what works for YOUR relationship and what makes the two of you happy together, not by some guide or "rules" of what should be.0
