Elders
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PapaverSomniferum
Posts: 2,677 Member
Last night, we gathered to send off an elder of our community, who crossed over 6 months ago. She'd chosen the day for us, designed the ritual for us, held our hands because we needed it.
She was very wise.
The chosen HP for the ceremony, a woman older than myself whom I look up to, said to me that she wasn't prepared to be losing so many elders. We've lost a handful of older, established, well-known members of the pagan/Wiccan community this year. Now, in front of me, is someone I look up to and respect as a teacher telling me that she isn't ready to step up and become an elder yet. She doesn't know enough. Her elders are leaving sooner than she expected. She didn't prepare.
I realized, here I am turning 30 this year, and I haven't learned NEARLY ENOUGH either.
I grew up in the pagan community. I'm second generation Wiccan, 4th generation kitchen witch. The old country traditions my great grandmother passed on go back who knows how long. I've been part of countless rituals. I can call quarters without thought. I know my way around the seasons and the moons and the circles.
But i've never "trained" in a structured coven. I've never studied under an ordained HP. I've never led group rituals. I could not teach a younger witch if required. Will I be unprepared when it's my turn? Will I move into crone-hood the same way I moved into motherhood? Reluctantly? The Gods and Goddesses dragging me through life's rites with me kicking and screaming "I'm not ready!"?
I realize now it's time to step up. I need to stop worrying so much about the mundane aspects of my life (exercise, financial security, secular recreation) and start putting more energy back into the spiritual aspect of my life, which I've taken for granted forever.
I guess I'm really only posting this for encouragement. I'm scared of being a grown up, spiritually speaking. I've never been good at being an adult in ANY context.
Does anyone even frequent this group anymore?
She was very wise.
The chosen HP for the ceremony, a woman older than myself whom I look up to, said to me that she wasn't prepared to be losing so many elders. We've lost a handful of older, established, well-known members of the pagan/Wiccan community this year. Now, in front of me, is someone I look up to and respect as a teacher telling me that she isn't ready to step up and become an elder yet. She doesn't know enough. Her elders are leaving sooner than she expected. She didn't prepare.
I realized, here I am turning 30 this year, and I haven't learned NEARLY ENOUGH either.
I grew up in the pagan community. I'm second generation Wiccan, 4th generation kitchen witch. The old country traditions my great grandmother passed on go back who knows how long. I've been part of countless rituals. I can call quarters without thought. I know my way around the seasons and the moons and the circles.
But i've never "trained" in a structured coven. I've never studied under an ordained HP. I've never led group rituals. I could not teach a younger witch if required. Will I be unprepared when it's my turn? Will I move into crone-hood the same way I moved into motherhood? Reluctantly? The Gods and Goddesses dragging me through life's rites with me kicking and screaming "I'm not ready!"?
I realize now it's time to step up. I need to stop worrying so much about the mundane aspects of my life (exercise, financial security, secular recreation) and start putting more energy back into the spiritual aspect of my life, which I've taken for granted forever.
I guess I'm really only posting this for encouragement. I'm scared of being a grown up, spiritually speaking. I've never been good at being an adult in ANY context.
Does anyone even frequent this group anymore?
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Replies
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I still stop in when I see a new post.
While not Officially anything, I do believe in our mother earth and respect for her as understood by the American Indians. Specifically, the Sequoyah Cherokee.
The only advice I can offer is do not be scared as we are all children. Some just know more and it is our privilege to learn all we can.
Peace be with you.0 -
Your so lucky to have so many of like faith around you. I've been a solitary and my only contact is thru the net. Let the Goddess lead you and you will be awesome. No one can ever learn too much or not enough. As the time is right the lessons will be learned.
Bright Blessings to you and yours0
