Motivating a friend who doesnt want it... HELP!

serenitygranted11

I've asked this to my other MFP friends but how do you motivate a friend who doesnt really care (but knows they need to) lose weight?

My best friend is around the same height at me 4'9" and weights maybe close to 300lbs! If I'm 4'9 and I now weight 175 and i'm having troubles (just climbing a flight of stairs) I know life must be hard for her! She always complaining of headaches and knee pains... I really think she may have some type issues such as high bp or diabetes but she wont go to doctor (money issues) but like I told her your heatlh is more important you can always go to a ER and have them bill you!

I've tried to get her to go on simple walks with me and she wont... i brag about the 14lbs I've lost in a month and she's happy but she still doesnt want to do anything! i've tried to get her to at least change her eating habits but he says her "man" wont eat healthly (he has diabetes) so they really should be living a healthier lifestyle! She loves to cook but she always posting pics of what she's cooking and its always super cheesy, greasy and great for the tastebuds but bad for the heart!

Im just really scared if she doesnt lose weight she is going to die!

Strawberryswing33

Hi, I know how you feel, as my partner is morbidly obese and refuses to lose weight. He has a hard time going up and down stairs and has even experienced sleep apnea. I've tried to fix healthier meals, get him to go to the gym but to no avail. He keeps eating lots of food in one sitting and not the healthiest options either.

I've learned that you just can't stress yourself out about it. I know you worry, but the bottom line is, you can't make anyone do what they don't want to do. They have lose the weight for themselves. They have to WANT to do it for themselves. The best thing you can do right now is to continue being an example. Let her see how active you are and ultimately when she sees that you are getting down in size and feeling good, she may want to do it too.

I understand your worry though, there are tons of things that can come about due to extreme weight: diabetes (like her man has), high blood pressure and heart disease, increased risk of stroke and cancer, but she has to decide this for herself. I used to be the same way. I was super athletic before gaining all my weight during pregnancy and was in a state of denial until I realized that I wasn't able to do the same things I was before. That made me change everything. My friends tried to tell me, but I wouldn't listen until I was ready to hear it for myself. Be patient. She will come around eventually.

DivaTKG

Hey Diva.....

I have a friend in a similar situation as yours so I understand. The only difference is her health risk are not as severe as yours. However with that being said, a lot of times.....they have lost motivation because they have seen how far along you have come. What I have noticed is not to throw my weight loss in their face, however continue to encourage them to tag along on your current journey.

She wants help, but really don't know how to say it. Start small....with the grocery shopping. Show her how to incorporate fresh produce in her daily diet opposed to processed foods. SHOW her how to plan her meals out by visiting her home on a Sunday and making her meals for the week with her. My favorite quote is NO GOAL IS EVER SUCCESSFUL WITHOUT A PLAN.

It is apparent that living a healthier lifestyle is not only a goal for her, but for you as well. So make her feel that way opposed to "showing off" your success (not saying you are). But again, make her a part of your journey as of today. Set goals, get a calendar chart, have lunchtime accountability checks where you take photos of your lunches and send them to one another. Take a low cardio fitness class together.

What you must remember is that you must start small....once she gets encouraged, you will notice it because she will be the aggressor in the challenge opposed to you. But don't lose faith or hope in your friend. Make her a part of your journey and continue to be her accountability part. GOOD LUCK DIVA!!!