Horrible online profiles.
Replies
-
0
-
They must have gotten lost in the mail, you should resend them.0 -
They must have gotten lost in the mail, you should resend them.
I am sure we'd all like a peek
0 -
Chris, are you flashing your junk again?? :huh:
:bigsmile:0 -
Agree with this. People "put up" with a lot if their partner is sexy/hot! At least for a while. After a couple of weeks (depending on the person) personality trumps hot. I'd do sexy/hot but dumb as a stick a few times, then explain to him (using small words and hand signals when necessary) that it's been fun, but it's over. He'll be okay with that because he's sexy/hot and dumb as a stick.
That's actually a great point. Ideally, you get the combo of personality and looks but looks alone will work for a very short time. Unfortunately, personality alone won't. There has to be a sexual attraction. Luckily, we're all sort of infused with our own version of what we think "sexy" is - I know I've completely fallen for girls that get me a lot of raised eyebrows from friends and family. Fu[url]ck em.
Edit: thought about this for a minute and realized "sexy" can be a combination of physical traits, voice, emotional well-being, maturity, passion for life, hobbies, concern for animals, etc. Most of these things can't really come across honestly in an online dating profile, which is one of the reasons I've grown jaded with it.
[/url]
Agree that you have to fancy the person. That can manifest in all sorts of strange and wonderful ways. Your ideal partner will never be perfect (nobody is!), but should be perfect for you!!
A great conversation followed by great sex followed by a great conversation, is pretty perfect to me.! 0 -
Horrible profiles or horrible people?
The profiles probably work quite well - attractive girl who doesn't want to talk to 'liberals', doesn't.
Christian stuff would certainly put me off - and quite reasonably, as would the above definitely (ignoring that I'm in the UK.)0 -
Everyone's looks are going to change at some point, but a personality is forever.
I hear this argument a lot, but I'm not buying it. I know people don't like to admit it, but being with someone who is physically attractive to you is important.
Please don't quote me out of context. At no point in my post did I say looks don't or shouldn't matter. I said my non-negotiables are all things that relate to a man's character and personality. Physical attraction is more than important; it's necessary. But I can't nail that down to one or two or three things and call them "non-negotiable." I can't say "A man must be 6 ft tall, have blonde hair, and blue eyes, or I won't marry him." I can say "He must be attractive." But what does that mean? A different thing to me than to the woman in the next room, certainly.Also, personalities definitely change. I hear all the time stories about married couples who were so in love with their funny romantic partner until they turned into a boring, spiteful, and selfish prick.
That's the point: you hear "stories" about how someone went from being the most awesome person ever to being boring, spiteful, and selfish practically overnight. I think we all know it doesn't work that way. No one's personality changes that much. You're just willing to overlook certain things when your biggest problem is whether you're going to have sex twice a day or only once. When life gets more complicated than that, all the things that didn't really matter to you before start to become a lot more noticeable.0 -
Horrible profiles or horrible people?
The profiles probably work quite well - attractive girl who doesn't want to talk to 'liberals', doesn't.
Christian stuff would certainly put me off - and quite reasonably, as would the above definitely (ignoring that I'm in the UK.)
Why is it "horrible" for someone to say they don't want to date "liberals" or non-Christians? It's no more or less horrible than you suggesting "Christian stuff" puts you off.
It is OKAY to not want to date or marry someone whose political and/or religious views differ from yours. We are not applying for jobs here. Be open-minded about a person's life experiences (we all have a past) or what he/she does for a living (if they are happy, what difference does it really make?). But a person you're going to raise children with, share legal responsibilities with, make important life decisions with, etc., ... you're asking for a lifetime of arguments and struggle if you choose someone who has vastly different VALUES. That's not to say your attitude should be "anyone who doesn't believe what I believe is wrong." It's more like "Life is a lot easier when you share it with someone you don't have to philosophically debate on every single important decision."
I agree with the OP that the way some people go about expressing their desire to date someone with similar views is really, really bad, but the basic premise of preferring someone with similar views isn't. So yes, "horrible profiles," is a more apt description than "horrible people."0 -
Please don't quote me out of context.
Without quoting out of context, Internet forums would be incredibly boring. What would we argue about? Anyway, I said "I hear this argument a lot, but I'm not buying it. I know people don't like to admit it...". I'm taking a small piece of what you said and using it to discuss something I hear from others out in the really real world. All I know about you personally is that you are down with planks, which I can't argue with, so please don't take it as a personal attack, I apologize if it came off that way.That's the point: you hear "stories" about...
I have known people who have drastically changed personalities, for better and for worse. People change over the course of their lives based upon their experiences. A committed monogamous relationship is definitely one of those life-altering experiences and it takes the right kind of person to adapt to that properly while maintaining an attitude that still melds nicely with their partner.
So, if both looks AND personality can change, then someone saying only personality matters is basing this on something potentially temporary. So, why then, are so many people saying that basing it on looks as well is so wrong? (That's a general discussion point, not a finger point)0 -
While we follow a bit of a different 'system' in the UK, if an American republican were to discuss politics with me, they would come to the conclusion I was a 'liberal'. I've been called that enough times as an insult.
Why is it "horrible" for someone to say they don't want to date "liberals" or non-Christians? It's no more or less horrible than you suggesting "Christian stuff" puts you off.
I find I generally prefer to be with similar people too.
Soooo... I was questioning the OP's post and views; not expressing my own!
I do tend to be pretty open minded as it goes - it's rare that I have many close friends that actually share my (or in fact, any, sadly) political views.
I, as above; am not sure about this.I agree with the OP that the way some people go about expressing their desire to date someone with similar views is really, really bad, but the basic premise of preferring someone with similar views isn't. So yes, "horrible profiles," is a more apt description than "horrible people."
Everyone finds different things attractive. For instance, I find my thinking tends to be pretty different to strict Vegans. I still have some as friends, but when you're going through a list of (dating) 'CV's, there's got to be a lot more positive bits to convince me that I might want to message this person versus the next.
Different people find different things important. This is nature and I don't consider it a bad thing - it just is.
Stereotypically, blokes consider a woman's looks important. I tend to prefer women with a 'natural' beauty, rather than a layers of make up and orange fake tan beauty so many like.
I also tend to mind less about the looks the more I get to know and like a girl.
I've never found myself attracted to significantly over weight women, nor have I to men.
While I haven't, I do wonder about adding such to an online dating profile (well, the latter is already part of the system, of course.)
In some 'PUA' related thing (I suspect it was 'the game', as reading that's about the limit of my involvement with such) I can remember someone saying the 'quality' of women contacting them positively improved when they listed, honestly "I'm looking for athletic, young women, no kids looking for a good time" or something. They got some snotty emails from ones that weren't, but, the ones that did match were happy enough with their situation and people straight-talking.0 -
In some 'PUA' related thing (I suspect it was 'the game', as reading that's about the limit of my involvement with such) I can remember someone saying the 'quality' of women contacting them positively improved when they listed, honestly "I'm looking for athletic, young women, no kids looking for a good time" or something . They got some snotty emails from ones that weren't, but, the ones that did match were happy enough with their situation and people straight-talking.
I wrote a little more in a later post about the words chosen in a message versus the actual message being conveyed. The part about what the person is looking for in your bolded example above seems fine to me. However, if the message was actually written as "I think athletic women are hot and I hate kids. If you're fat or have trophies from some past relationship, don't bother me." is what was written, I can imagine that many women who were not put off by the first message would be put off by the second. In that sense, it's a horrible profile.0 -
Ah, but then the question is - would they want this kind of woman (or man in the original example)?I can imagine that many women who were not put off by the first message would be put off by the second. In that sense, it's a horrible profile.
That is precisely why I haven't written anything such - as I don't want to be seen as 'mean', which I don't consider myself to be.
I've seen people incredibly offended by people saying some along the lines of "I only want someone with white skin" - but if someone only finds them attracted to that sort of person, seems a sensible thing to write.
Of course, there the presumed sub-text is "I think people who don't have white skin are a sub-class". But then, I suspect someone who writes that sort of things in their profile probably won't get on too well long term with anyone that dislikes it; so actually it'll work nicely as a pre-selection!0
