NOTHING in common
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Moe4572
Posts: 1,430 Member
For the last couple days, have been exchanging short emails with a guy on POF.....just basics, where he lives, what he does, does he have kids, etc.
So, last night I asked about his pics because from one to another they seem very different - same person, just a differentl "look". He told me which one was most recent....and that his main pic was from last year or whatever. So then he said..." i am glad you saw something you like" I said "I like many things--the beach, rollercoasters, boating, baking, kids.....should I go on?" His response was "I hate all those things" So I responded with "I don't believe you
" because he had talked about his daughter and seemed to adore her, so it seemed he couldn't hate kids...........He says " I don't lie. I am not a sun lover, I get seasick, I would rather bumper cars, can't bake a lick" and I said "but you don't hate kids" and he said "those other than my own I do"
At this point, I am thinking we have little in common.......so I just say "headed to bed-have a great night"........He says "goodnight" and gives me his Cell number--WHY?????
Am I wrong to think that with all that at opposite ends, not worth pursuing?
So, last night I asked about his pics because from one to another they seem very different - same person, just a differentl "look". He told me which one was most recent....and that his main pic was from last year or whatever. So then he said..." i am glad you saw something you like" I said "I like many things--the beach, rollercoasters, boating, baking, kids.....should I go on?" His response was "I hate all those things" So I responded with "I don't believe you
" because he had talked about his daughter and seemed to adore her, so it seemed he couldn't hate kids...........He says " I don't lie. I am not a sun lover, I get seasick, I would rather bumper cars, can't bake a lick" and I said "but you don't hate kids" and he said "those other than my own I do"At this point, I am thinking we have little in common.......so I just say "headed to bed-have a great night"........He says "goodnight" and gives me his Cell number--WHY?????
Am I wrong to think that with all that at opposite ends, not worth pursuing?
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*Enter buzzer sound here*
NEXT......0 -
*Enter buzzer sound here*
NEXT......
If you have bad feelings about him not liking your stuff Next him before it goes futher0 -
I can never help but to call people like that out.
"You hate everything I love. Or you just like to year it down. Either way, why do you think I would call you after that display?"0 -
I can tell you what he likes. The fact you two have parts that complement each other. That's why he messaged you :P0
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Onto the next!0
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For the last couple days, have been exchanging short emails with a guy on POF.....just basics, where he lives, what he does, does he have kids, etc.
So, last night I asked about his pics because from one to another they seem very different - same person, just a differentl "look". He told me which one was most recent....and that his main pic was from last year or whatever. So then he said..." i am glad you saw something you like" I said "I like many things--the beach, rollercoasters, boating, baking, kids.....should I go on?" His response was "I hate all those things" So I responded with "I don't believe you" because he had talked about his daughter and seemed to adore her, so it seemed he couldn't hate kids...........He says " I don't lie. I am not a sun lover, I get seasick, I would rather bumper cars, can't bake a lick" and I said "but you don't hate kids" and he said "those other than my own I do"
At this point, I am thinking we have little in common.......so I just say "headed to bed-have a great night"........He says "goodnight" and gives me his Cell number--WHY?????
Am I wrong to think that with all that at opposite ends, not worth pursuing?
Are those all "deal breakers?" Do you spend alot of time at the beach/on rollercoasters/boating/baking? I could see him hating kids could be a dealbreaker, especially if you have kids.0 -
I can tell you what he likes. The fact you two have parts that complement each other. That's why he messaged you :P
I liked your cat in the pants picture better.0 -
Are those all "deal breakers?" Do you spend alot of time at the beach/on rollercoasters/boating/baking? I could see him hating kids could be a dealbreaker, especially if you have kids.
Honestly, the part that bothered me is the part where he responded with "I hate all those things". She's expressing things that she loves to do and enjoys and he slams it, then when she laughs it off, he slams it more. The deal breaker for me would be his negativity. I know there are people that do this sort of thing, they try to feel superior by hating all things others like (hipsters, I'm looking at you) for the sake of being cynical.
If I was telling a guy things that I love as a part of my life and he said "I hate all of those things" without even going into the things HE likes, I would say "Okay, well I hope the next lady you speak with is a better match. Have a good night!" because NOBODY GOT TIME FO' THAT!
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Are those all "deal breakers?" Do you spend alot of time at the beach/on rollercoasters/boating/baking? I could see him hating kids could be a dealbreaker, especially if you have kids.
Honestly, the part that bothered me is the part where he responded with "I hate all those things". She's expressing things that she loves to do and enjoys and he slams it, then when she laughs it off, he slams it more. The deal breaker for me would be his negativity. I know there are people that do this sort of thing, they try to feel superior by hating all things others like (hipsters, I'm looking at you) for the sake of being cynical.
If I was telling a guy things that I love as a part of my life and he said "I hate all of those things" without even going into the things HE likes, I would say "Okay, well I hope the next lady you speak with is a better match. Have a good night!" because NOBODY GOT TIME FO' THAT!
True. If he was serious then he needs to go find a personality. It's kinda hard to tell via internet... because even if i really did hate something I could still see myself saying something like that and laughing about it...Something like "Awesome, you just named all the things that I hate" but if I did it online then you wouldnt' be able to tell that there was some humor there.0 -
I can tell you what he likes. The fact you two have parts that complement each other. That's why he messaged you :P
This. If he were interested in a relationship at all, he would've found a way to be honest about having different interests without blatantly slamming yours. This guy is hoping that you're dumb, desperate, or that you simply have no self-respect.0 -
I can tell you what he likes. The fact you two have parts that complement each other. That's why he messaged you :P
This. If he were interested in a relationship at all, he would've found a way to be honest about having different interests without blatantly slamming yours. This guy is hoping that you're dumb, desperate, or that you simply have no self-respect.
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He just sounds like a miserable human being with a negative outlook.0
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Are those all "deal breakers?" Do you spend alot of time at the beach/on rollercoasters/boating/baking? I could see him hating kids could be a dealbreaker, especially if you have kids.
Honestly, the part that bothered me is the part where he responded with "I hate all those things". She's expressing things that she loves to do and enjoys and he slams it, then when she laughs it off, he slams it more. The deal breaker for me would be his negativity. I know there are people that do this sort of thing, they try to feel superior by hating all things others like (hipsters, I'm looking at you) for the sake of being cynical.
If I was telling a guy things that I love as a part of my life and he said "I hate all of those things" without even going into the things HE likes, I would say "Okay, well I hope the next lady you speak with is a better match. Have a good night!" because NOBODY GOT TIME FO' THAT!
I can agree to the negative part.. See I read an article recently about how common interests aren't core values and it was very informative. Does it really matter if he likes country music and you don't? no not really, but the fact that you listed your likes and instead of him listing his - or saying 'hey I've never done that but I'd try' he slammed then and that is negative... so yeah, I wouldn't invest anytime in time I don't think....0 -
They aren't dealbreakers per se....if it was one of those things, but the fact that he hates them all.....or even that he said he did with backup that seemed to prove it.....yeah, no connection I am thinking. But I just thought it was odd that after that exchange he gives me his number? Odd.....0
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They aren't dealbreakers per se....if it was one of those things, but the fact that he hates them all.....or even that he said he did with backup that seemed to prove it.....yeah, no connection I am thinking. But I just thought it was odd that after that exchange he gives me his number? Odd.....
It's also possible that he was being funny, and that was his humor and you missed it?
Not sure!!!0 -
They aren't dealbreakers per se....if it was one of those things, but the fact that he hates them all.....or even that he said he did with backup that seemed to prove it.....yeah, no connection I am thinking. But I just thought it was odd that after that exchange he gives me his number? Odd.....
It's also possible that he was being funny, and that was his humor and you missed it?
Not sure!!!
I agree he could be trying to be funny. Personally I'd wait a bit before scaring her off with my terrible humor. I wouldn't have done this so soon, but again, that's me.0 -
They aren't dealbreakers per se....if it was one of those things, but the fact that he hates them all.....or even that he said he did with backup that seemed to prove it.....yeah, no connection I am thinking. But I just thought it was odd that after that exchange he gives me his number? Odd.....
It's also possible that he was being funny, and that was his humor and you missed it?
Not sure!!!
I agree he could be trying to be funny. Personally I'd wait a bit before scaring her off with my terrible humor. I wouldn't have done this so soon, but again, that's me.
It's pretty easy to get a joking tone across. There's a difference between "I hate all of those things" and "Oh shucks, I hate all of those things LOL". Or simple "Jk, jk"0 -
But I did think he was being funny which is why I said I didn't believe him...............and he provided backup....guess it still could be trying to be funny.....but really was not--and I have not heard from him again..........so maybe he got it?0
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I dont think he thinks anything of it. He's just being honest. Not all relationships are built on common interests. Perhaps you could have said "what do you like then?"
I dunno, it's up to you if you want to find out if he's a miserable git or if you have anything else in common.0 -
Have you asked him if there are other things in this world that he loves? It might be a lot of stuff you still enjoy. There are a zillion hobbies.
I find more helpful to have a similar mindset about how you like to live life more than what activities fall in that range.
both active but he gets seasick and doesnt like the sun? what about camping?0
