Date tonight...third strike or third time's a charm?

UrbanLotus

I'm hoping its the latter! This is my third date this week and the first 2 were awful - I actually ended up walking out on one . All online/first dates, I'm not super excited about this one but he seems ok lol.

What do you do if you aren't interested after meeting someone for the first time? Like monday's date, I knew in the first minute it was a no-go, but I made it 40 minutes and then said we should leave - he misunderstood and thought I meant go somewhere else after, so that was awkward. I wish there was a nice way to bow out in the first 5 min!

pa_jorg

Good luck tonight!


Reminds me of HIMYM: http://how-i-met-your-mother.wikia.com/wiki/Lemon_Law

UrbanLotus

LOL I love that!!!!

TheKitsune6

"OH MY GOD SOMEONE PUT DIARRHEA IN MY PANTS"

*Flee*

If you get that reference good things will happen to you.

AnnaPixie

Well, I dont ever meet someone that I haven't struck up a friendship with by email and phone. So, I figure (and I tell him) that the worst that can happen on a date is that we dont have sexual chemistry but we have enough in common to have a nice evening. together.

I think legging it after 10 mins is just cruel. I had it done to me once, and never want it to happen again.

Alternatively, go for a coffee date during lunch, then, there is an easy way out.

Good luck tonight, hope it's 3rd time lucky! :flowerforyou:

UrbanLotus

"OH MY GOD SOMEONE PUT DIARRHEA IN MY PANTS"

*Flee*

If you get that reference good things will happen to you.

OH noooooooo I doomed .

Anna - i've chatted to all these guys a bit on text/email, but definitely no "friendship" yet you know? I prefer to meet someone quickly to see if there is any point, so I don't waste too much of my time. Nope, no nice evenings here! Yeah you are right that it would be cruel, just wishful thinking! Unfortunately no time at lunch, but these have all been coffee/drink dates so I don't feel so bad peacing out after 1 coffee/drink. Yes lets hope, thanks

TheKitsune6

"OH MY GOD SOMEONE PUT DIARRHEA IN MY PANTS"

*Flee*

If you get that reference good things will happen to you.

OH noooooooo I doomed .

Anna - i've chatted to all these guys a bit on text/email, but definitely no "friendship" yet you know? I prefer to meet someone quickly to see if there is any point, so I don't waste too much of my time. Nope, no nice evenings here! Yeah you are right that it would be cruel, just wishful thinking! Unfortunately no time at lunch, but these have all been coffee/drink dates so I don't feel so bad peacing out after 1 coffee/drink. Yes lets hope, thanks

It's okay, I quoted it wrong anyway. Forgive me, it's been about a decade.

2stepz

Good luck tonight!


Reminds me of HIMYM: http://how-i-met-your-mother.wikia.com/wiki/Lemon_Law

Reminds me of a miniature of Bill Engvall's "here's you're sign" that I carried in High School. I now feel the need to print and carry one of these with me. I wonder how that would go over in real life??

kimad

Good luck!

I give you props for walking out... I personally usually have enough in common with them to atleast enjoy the evening...and I am a fairly social, easy going girl so haven't had a problem. I just leave and be thankful I don't have to see them again but looking back, you know what? I think I enjoyed most my dates, it was more attraction and chemistry that was missing.

UrbanLotus

Good luck!

I give you props for walking out... I personally usually have enough in common with them to at least enjoy the evening...and I am a fairly social, easy going girl so haven't had a problem. I just leave and be thankful I don't have to see them again but looking back, you know what? I think I enjoyed most my dates, it was more attraction and chemistry that was missing.

I'm the same way...very social etc, but that wasn't the problem - its that he was a complete *kitten* and I had had enough. He stood me up once and this was his second chance but he was still 30 minutes late, THEN he was an *kitten* when I agreed to have a drink with him. I'm not THAT easygoing.

kimad

Good luck!

I give you props for walking out... I personally usually have enough in common with them to at least enjoy the evening...and I am a fairly social, easy going girl so haven't had a problem. I just leave and be thankful I don't have to see them again but looking back, you know what? I think I enjoyed most my dates, it was more attraction and chemistry that was missing.

I'm the same way...very social etc, but that wasn't the problem - its that he was a complete *kitten* and I had had enough. He stood me up once and this was his second chance but he was still 30 minutes late, THEN he was an *kitten* when I agreed to have a drink with him. I'm not THAT easygoing.

Did he physically stand you up? or just cancel? If he stood you up, then was 30 mins late, I can't believe you waited for him.. you are too kind. I would have been out of there. He has no class and no business trying to get with you or anyone for that matter!

SO how was the date?

UrbanLotus

Good luck!

I give you props for walking out... I personally usually have enough in common with them to at least enjoy the evening...and I am a fairly social, easy going girl so haven't had a problem. I just leave and be thankful I don't have to see them again but looking back, you know what? I think I enjoyed most my dates, it was more attraction and chemistry that was missing.

I'm the same way...very social etc, but that wasn't the problem - its that he was a complete *kitten* and I had had enough. He stood me up once and this was his second chance but he was still 30 minutes late, THEN he was an *kitten* when I agreed to have a drink with him. I'm not THAT easygoing.

Did he physically stand you up? or just cancel? If he stood you up, then was 30 mins late, I can't believe you waited for him.. you are too kind. I would have been out of there. He has no class and no business trying to get with you or anyone for that matter!

SO how was the date?

Its a long story, but yeah, essentially physically stood me up - I didn't hear from him so I decided not to go, but he didn't call till 2 days later (he was out of the country and getting back the day we were going out - HIS idea). Yeah then I agree to try once more, said he could call me and if I was free we could go out - I wasn't going to commit to plans to him. So he called and I agreed to meet him a few hours later, he was 30 minutes late even though he lived literally a 4 minute walk from the place. I DID actually leave (to be fair, he did respond to my text when I said I was there etc, but kept saying he would be there in 2 min) but he was coming in and I guess saw me leaving, he was calling me and I didn't pick up so he followed me. Begged my forgiveness and sht, I agreed to 1 drink, then he was a complete *kitten*. So yeah, first time in my life, I just left in the middle of it. I am trying to be more open to guys and let things go, but yeah even this was too much.

Tonight's date was not bad! I'd be ok either way - if he wants to go out again I'll go, but if not thats cool too. He was very nice and complimentary though so it was a good evening

kimad

Good luck!

I give you props for walking out... I personally usually have enough in common with them to at least enjoy the evening...and I am a fairly social, easy going girl so haven't had a problem. I just leave and be thankful I don't have to see them again but looking back, you know what? I think I enjoyed most my dates, it was more attraction and chemistry that was missing.

I'm the same way...very social etc, but that wasn't the problem - its that he was a complete *kitten* and I had had enough. He stood me up once and this was his second chance but he was still 30 minutes late, THEN he was an *kitten* when I agreed to have a drink with him. I'm not THAT easygoing.

Did he physically stand you up? or just cancel? If he stood you up, then was 30 mins late, I can't believe you waited for him.. you are too kind. I would have been out of there. He has no class and no business trying to get with you or anyone for that matter!

SO how was the date?

Its a long story, but yeah, essentially physically stood me up - I didn't hear from him so I decided not to go, but he didn't call till 2 days later (he was out of the country and getting back the day we were going out - HIS idea). Yeah then I agree to try once more, said he could call me and if I was free we could go out - I wasn't going to commit to plans to him. So he called and I agreed to meet him a few hours later, he was 30 minutes late even though he lived literally a 4 minute walk from the place. I DID actually leave (to be fair, he did respond to my text when I said I was there etc, but kept saying he would be there in 2 min) but he was coming in and I guess saw me leaving, he was calling me and I didn't pick up so he followed me. Begged my forgiveness and sht, I agreed to 1 drink, then he was a complete *kitten*. So yeah, first time in my life, I just left in the middle of it. I am trying to be more open to guys and let things go, but yeah even this was too much.

Tonight's date was not bad! I'd be ok either way - if he wants to go out again I'll go, but if not thats cool too. He was very nice and complimentary though so it was a good evening

I used to let things go and go with it all... but I found that I let losers have their way, and that isn't cool! You stand me up, you are done! If you have a great excuse to cancel, I may accept that. All becuase I cancelled on a guy once (I wasn't feeling it) but he wanted to see me still, so I went and he was a nice guy... I think I friend zoned him though lol

Glad tonight was fun.. when I feel ok, but uncertain I always go out again! Keep us posted.
I am kind of in limbo with one guy..... I keep overthinking stuff, but then he keeps communicating in a way that I don't feel is right, so who knows?? I think I will keep my options open and see him if not busy, but keep seeing others.

ETA: did you just up and leave? this sounds like a great story!

UrbanLotus

I used to let things go and go with it all... but I found that I let losers have their way, and that isn't cool! You stand me up, you are done! If you have a great excuse to cancel, I may accept that. All becuase I cancelled on a guy once (I wasn't feeling it) but he wanted to see me still, so I went and he was a nice guy... I think I friend zoned him though lol

Glad tonight was fun.. when I feel ok, but uncertain I always go out again! Keep us posted.
I am kind of in limbo with one guy..... I keep overthinking stuff, but then he keeps communicating in a way that I don't feel is right, so who knows?? I think I will keep my options open and see him if not busy, but keep seeing others.

ETA: did you just up and leave? this sounds like a great story!

Yeah I have gone through the whole spectrum - when I was younger I let evvvverything go & was walked all over, then I did a 180 and was a total hardazz, so I'm trying to find a middle ground now lol. He had an ok excuse (out of the country, flight was late, phone turned on a few days after he got back) so I tried to let it go. Bad idea! He said something moronic and I was pissed, so after saying a few things I was like - you know what, I've had enough of this, thank you for the drink, I'm leaving - and walked out before he could say a word lol.

Hmm yeah, be mindful of your gut! Or tell him how you want to communicate, if you're at the point where you can do that? Def keep your options open, thats always a must!

Yes if he asks I will go, there were no dealbreakers or anything so I'd be open to it - not sure I was attracted to him though but we will see!

kimad

I used to let things go and go with it all... but I found that I let losers have their way, and that isn't cool! You stand me up, you are done! If you have a great excuse to cancel, I may accept that. All becuase I cancelled on a guy once (I wasn't feeling it) but he wanted to see me still, so I went and he was a nice guy... I think I friend zoned him though lol

Glad tonight was fun.. when I feel ok, but uncertain I always go out again! Keep us posted.
I am kind of in limbo with one guy..... I keep overthinking stuff, but then he keeps communicating in a way that I don't feel is right, so who knows?? I think I will keep my options open and see him if not busy, but keep seeing others.

ETA: did you just up and leave? this sounds like a great story!

Yeah I have gone through the whole spectrum - when I was younger I let evvvverything go & was walked all over, then I did a 180 and was a total hardazz, so I'm trying to find a middle ground now lol. He had an ok excuse (out of the country, flight was late, phone turned on a few days after he got back) so I tried to let it go. Bad idea! He said something moronic and I was pissed, so after saying a few things I was like - you know what, I've had enough of this, thank you for the drink, I'm leaving - and walked out before he could say a word lol.

Hmm yeah, be mindful of your gut! Or tell him how you want to communicate, if you're at the point where you can do that? Def keep your options open, thats always a must!

Yes if he asks I will go, there were no dealbreakers or anything so I'd be open to it - not sure I was attracted to him though but we will see!

GOod for you!!!

Well we have had 4 dates in 1 month.. he is a very involved parent and into sports, etc. That is ok, we have maintained once a week, but we talk maybe 30 mins a day (texts) sometimes a couple hours, but he rarely ends the convo - he just vanishes. So we could be mid topic and WAM he is gone. He has always been this way, so I wasn't offended overly, but now it kind of bugs me. I don't know?!?! Anyone else experience this.

Sometimes people grow on you - I say give him another chance

christine24t

^ that is my pet peeve. As Ruminations worded it...what did you just drop your phone and run??

But seriously. If you have to stop texting, say something, even just "I gotta go I'll text you later!"

kimad

^ that is my pet peeve. As Ruminations worded it...what did you just drop your phone and run??

But seriously. If you have to stop texting, say something, even just "I gotta go I'll text you later!"

Thank you! I agree!
I mean, I don't think I am in any place to say something, but I almost think his texting ettiquette is terrible..
It has always been this way, the only time I get any heads up is when its like 11pm, I either day good night or he does... otherwise we could litterly be mid convo.

I kinda have decided to see other people too, and just play it casual with him.... then I can feel better about it all

lacroyx

^ that is my pet peeve. As Ruminations worded it...what did you just drop your phone and run??

But seriously. If you have to stop texting, say something, even just "I gotta go I'll text you later!"

Thank you! I agree!
I mean, I don't think I am in any place to say something, but I almost think his texting ettiquette is terrible..
It has always been this way, the only time I get any heads up is when its like 11pm, I either day good night or he does... otherwise we could litterly be mid convo.

I kinda have decided to see other people too, and just play it casual with him.... then I can feel better about it all

I'm guilty of this. I work weird graveyard hours. I'll be awake through out the night and into the early afternoon but I then fade and pass out. I'll receive texts during the afternoon and evening and not be able to answer them until morning especially since I can't have my cel phone at work. Most people I have explained this to understand though. Working graveyard, my brain just doesn't function like day people a lot of the times.

kimad

^ that is my pet peeve. As Ruminations worded it...what did you just drop your phone and run??

But seriously. If you have to stop texting, say something, even just "I gotta go I'll text you later!"

Thank you! I agree!
I mean, I don't think I am in any place to say something, but I almost think his texting ettiquette is terrible..
It has always been this way, the only time I get any heads up is when its like 11pm, I either day good night or he does... otherwise we could litterly be mid convo.

I kinda have decided to see other people too, and just play it casual with him.... then I can feel better about it all

I'm guilty of this. I work weird graveyard hours. I'll be awake through out the night and into the early afternoon but I then fade and pass out. I'll receive texts during the afternoon and evening and not be able to answer them until morning especially since I can't have my cel phone at work. Most people I have explained this to understand though. Working graveyard, my brain just doesn't function like day people a lot of the times.

If you are working and not answering for hours I think that is ok. It's the mid convo stuff. I mean I can ask a related ?? To the convo and then he's gone and when he resurfaces its a fresh start. If I had asked a question it wouldn't get answered.

nolachick

If you are working and not answering for hours I think that is ok. It's the mid convo stuff. I mean I can ask a related ?? To the convo and then he's gone and when he resurfaces its a fresh start. If I had asked a question it wouldn't get answered.

that is so rude! I would totally be turned off by that. maybe when u see each other in person u should bring it up. guys usually dont think its a big deal whereas girls usually get offended, its a pet peeve of mine.

EBFNP

In reference to the above post, I think this guy is the type who wants to control the situation. I am pretty sure he saw the message when you sent it, but rather not answer it he just went silent. Then he probably changes the subject because he doesn't feels you deserve an answer.