Weeding The Garden
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Inshape13
Posts: 680 Member
This weekend proved to be a challenge for me and I had to take a long look to see why it was. There are many things that I can be happy with in my life and I have been actively working on silencing my inner critic that thrives on my being perfect or at least pushes me to be.
While looking deep within I came to see that I do really want happiness, but the happiness that I am going after is other people being happy....and me sacrificing myself to make that happen. Sometimes it comes about by not wanting to rock the boat or be criticized by others(frequently) and sometimes it comes from wanting to help other people and being walked on and never having help come in this direction. No matter what the reason I must see it for what it is, me putting myself last while putting others first. When this happens I sit back quietly while the stress builds and then builds and then it blows up into a full blown binge session because I feel like there is no other way to cope. I am slowly sacrificing myself to try to accomodate others and that is not where I want to be anymore.
I decided to take the first step this weekend and put me first for once. That meant not catering to what others wanted to do and not doing things so that others would not feel bad because in the end I can't make them happy, but I can definitely make me unhappy and I am making the choice not to do that any longer. It is not worth it and it is causing me too much stress. Seeing what I can change and who I really am, not what others see in me, went well this weekend and I am going to continue this journey.
This week take a look at your motives behind what you do and weed your garden of friends and aquaintances. Really examine what the positive friends give to your life and if people are takers or critics then look at what they are costing you. You are worth every bit of your happiness and inner peace and we all deserve feeling strong and loved. Best wishes and make this week great!
While looking deep within I came to see that I do really want happiness, but the happiness that I am going after is other people being happy....and me sacrificing myself to make that happen. Sometimes it comes about by not wanting to rock the boat or be criticized by others(frequently) and sometimes it comes from wanting to help other people and being walked on and never having help come in this direction. No matter what the reason I must see it for what it is, me putting myself last while putting others first. When this happens I sit back quietly while the stress builds and then builds and then it blows up into a full blown binge session because I feel like there is no other way to cope. I am slowly sacrificing myself to try to accomodate others and that is not where I want to be anymore.
I decided to take the first step this weekend and put me first for once. That meant not catering to what others wanted to do and not doing things so that others would not feel bad because in the end I can't make them happy, but I can definitely make me unhappy and I am making the choice not to do that any longer. It is not worth it and it is causing me too much stress. Seeing what I can change and who I really am, not what others see in me, went well this weekend and I am going to continue this journey.
This week take a look at your motives behind what you do and weed your garden of friends and aquaintances. Really examine what the positive friends give to your life and if people are takers or critics then look at what they are costing you. You are worth every bit of your happiness and inner peace and we all deserve feeling strong and loved. Best wishes and make this week great!
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