Week 3-make peace with food
mommamuscles
Posts: 584 Member
Well this week builds on what we've already been working on-ditch the diet mentality and honor your hunger.
Last week we talked about giving yourself unconditional permission to eat when you are hungry. Now we are taking that a step further and saying give yourself unconditional permission to eat whatever you want. Yes whatever!!!!
This is definitely the most challenging for me! Even though over the past two years I have made great strides in fueling my body and could never return to a low calorie diet, I still have certain foods that I label as good/bad. I'm working hard to reintroduce those back into my diet, even if it messes up my macros!
Telling yourself that certain foods are "off limits" or "bad" or "fattening" or whatever often leads to last supper eating and a return to "get back on track" ; I.e. start the diet again.
The effects of biological deprivation (under eating) are one thing, but the psychological deprivation is something else. We can be physically feeding our bodies while still telling ourselves that there are foods we shouldn't eat. Then when we eat those foods we tend to feel we've fallen off the wagon and develop a get it while you can attitude towards that food. Or maybe there's a food you tend to overeat so you feel you can't be trusted with it. You won't even allow yourself a bite because you fear with that first bite you are triggering a binge, or you think the more you eat the more you will crave it. This tends to be a self fulfilling prophecy.
When we tell ourselves we can't have something, we tend to desire that thing with greater intensity.
The answer to all this is to stop labeling foods and allow all foods back into your diet. Even sugar or fried food or whatever you feel your "trigger foods are. Reintroduce them in such a way that you are not eating under circumstances that may trigger binge eating. Eat them when you are calm and have time to really focus on the experience of eating. You may even find the food you thought you wanted so badly doesn't even taste good!
Some fears you may have about this process:
1. I won't stop eating
Yes, when you reintroduce forbidden foods into your diet you may eat them with some intensity. You may even overeat them but that doesn't mean you've failed. This is all part of the learning experience of making peace with food.
2. I've tried it before-it doesn't work
This is related to #1 and I truly believe we will stop once we give ourselves permission to eat as much as we want...taking into consideration how we feel when we stuff ourselves. I mean really, who wants to feel like that?
3. Self fulfilling prophecy
I discussed this above. Most of the time these are ideas planted into our heads by years of dieting and then reinforced by our own behavior.
4. Lack of self trust
We have to learn again how to listen to our bodies and after a time, we will probably find that if we listen to our bodies we will choose mostly nutritious foods with a treat here and there. Especially if our parents started restricting our food choices early in life we got the message early on we couldn't be trusted with food.
A few steps:
1. Make a list of foods that appeal to you.
2. Circle the ones that are currently not a part of your regular diet
3. Introduce them one a a time. You may find it safer to do so in a restaurant or other controlled setting.
4. Focus on how the food tastes and makes you feel. If it was a pleasurable experience, give yourself permission to eat as often as you like!
Last week we talked about giving yourself unconditional permission to eat when you are hungry. Now we are taking that a step further and saying give yourself unconditional permission to eat whatever you want. Yes whatever!!!!
This is definitely the most challenging for me! Even though over the past two years I have made great strides in fueling my body and could never return to a low calorie diet, I still have certain foods that I label as good/bad. I'm working hard to reintroduce those back into my diet, even if it messes up my macros!
Telling yourself that certain foods are "off limits" or "bad" or "fattening" or whatever often leads to last supper eating and a return to "get back on track" ; I.e. start the diet again.
The effects of biological deprivation (under eating) are one thing, but the psychological deprivation is something else. We can be physically feeding our bodies while still telling ourselves that there are foods we shouldn't eat. Then when we eat those foods we tend to feel we've fallen off the wagon and develop a get it while you can attitude towards that food. Or maybe there's a food you tend to overeat so you feel you can't be trusted with it. You won't even allow yourself a bite because you fear with that first bite you are triggering a binge, or you think the more you eat the more you will crave it. This tends to be a self fulfilling prophecy.
When we tell ourselves we can't have something, we tend to desire that thing with greater intensity.
The answer to all this is to stop labeling foods and allow all foods back into your diet. Even sugar or fried food or whatever you feel your "trigger foods are. Reintroduce them in such a way that you are not eating under circumstances that may trigger binge eating. Eat them when you are calm and have time to really focus on the experience of eating. You may even find the food you thought you wanted so badly doesn't even taste good!
Some fears you may have about this process:
1. I won't stop eating
Yes, when you reintroduce forbidden foods into your diet you may eat them with some intensity. You may even overeat them but that doesn't mean you've failed. This is all part of the learning experience of making peace with food.
2. I've tried it before-it doesn't work
This is related to #1 and I truly believe we will stop once we give ourselves permission to eat as much as we want...taking into consideration how we feel when we stuff ourselves. I mean really, who wants to feel like that?
3. Self fulfilling prophecy
I discussed this above. Most of the time these are ideas planted into our heads by years of dieting and then reinforced by our own behavior.
4. Lack of self trust
We have to learn again how to listen to our bodies and after a time, we will probably find that if we listen to our bodies we will choose mostly nutritious foods with a treat here and there. Especially if our parents started restricting our food choices early in life we got the message early on we couldn't be trusted with food.
A few steps:
1. Make a list of foods that appeal to you.
2. Circle the ones that are currently not a part of your regular diet
3. Introduce them one a a time. You may find it safer to do so in a restaurant or other controlled setting.
4. Focus on how the food tastes and makes you feel. If it was a pleasurable experience, give yourself permission to eat as often as you like!
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