Single Peeps!

Join

Going out with a guy who's on a swingers site....

2»

Replies

  • Temporalia
    Temporalia Posts: 1,151 Member
    And like him, I would probably tell a date at the end of the first date so I wasn't judge without him meeting me and also, to not waste his time if he's not interested into the lifestyle.
    Event then, it seems like a long shot to me (as in: poor ROI, waste of my time, etc.).
    I'd rather hang around places where I'm more likely to meet other "rapists".

    I'm not in a dating phase right now, so it's pretty easy for me, I hang around others in the lifestyle. If I meet outside of it, I don't tell. But back when I was dating, if I found someone really interesting, I would wait after first date.
  • Temporalia
    Temporalia Posts: 1,151 Member
    UPDATE: So, I asked him if he ever googled his email address. He said no, but then he did. I'm like are you bi? He's like NO, I LOVE WOMEN. Well, the site he is a member of is for swingers/cuckold (sp?). He wants to be with only one woman, but watch while she has sex with others guys! He said he was going to tell me he was a freak at the end of our first date! WTH? See ya!!!

    Speaking as someone with outside the "norm" fetishes, there is a way to be polite about not being interested in the same things as someone else. It doesn't make him a bad person, he isn't hurting anyone, it just means the two of you aren't a match. I'm sure there are aspects about you that might make someone else have a similar disgusted reaction - how would that make you feel?

    I have to agree with previous poster. I am a full on swinger, i'm not ashamed to admit it, it's my choice. If I weren't and met someone who's into it, I would just leave it at that. There's no space in this society to judge people with different lifestyles. It's a choice and it's not like i'm going to force anyone into that if they are not interested. And like him, I would probably tell a date at the end of the first date so I wasn't judge without him meeting me and also, to not waste his time if he's not interested into the lifestyle.

    We're not freaks or bad people, or raping people (like I heard on the radio SMH) just have different needs and a different lifestyle.

    If I had a dollar for every time someone equated alternative lifestyles to rape I wouldn't have to work ever again. unimpressed.gif

    I know :grumble: People think it's ok to judge without knowing what it is. We don't actually walk around naked just getting it on, it's much more complex than that.

    Hahaha, I love when people think nudists and swingers are the same thing :laugh:

    I've actually heard of a nudist/ swinger camping around here, that must be so confusing to people :laugh:
  • MissingMinnesota
    MissingMinnesota Posts: 7,486 Member
    And like him, I would probably tell a date at the end of the first date so I wasn't judge without him meeting me and also, to not waste his time if he's not interested into the lifestyle.
    Event then, it seems like a long shot to me (as in: poor ROI, waste of my time, etc.).
    I'd rather hang around places where I'm more likely to meet other "rapists".

    Hey Flim long time no see. The swingers topic pique your interest?
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    The one thing you should do before dating a swinger is find out how hot his friends are. Get it, get it?

    :laugh: :laugh:

    LMBO
  • TheKitsune6
    TheKitsune6 Posts: 5,798 Member
    UPDATE: So, I asked him if he ever googled his email address. He said no, but then he did. I'm like are you bi? He's like NO, I LOVE WOMEN. Well, the site he is a member of is for swingers/cuckold (sp?). He wants to be with only one woman, but watch while she has sex with others guys! He said he was going to tell me he was a freak at the end of our first date! WTH? See ya!!!

    Speaking as someone with outside the "norm" fetishes, there is a way to be polite about not being interested in the same things as someone else. It doesn't make him a bad person, he isn't hurting anyone, it just means the two of you aren't a match. I'm sure there are aspects about you that might make someone else have a similar disgusted reaction - how would that make you feel?

    I have to agree with previous poster. I am a full on swinger, i'm not ashamed to admit it, it's my choice. If I weren't and met someone who's into it, I would just leave it at that. There's no space in this society to judge people with different lifestyles. It's a choice and it's not like i'm going to force anyone into that if they are not interested. And like him, I would probably tell a date at the end of the first date so I wasn't judge without him meeting me and also, to not waste his time if he's not interested into the lifestyle.

    We're not freaks or bad people, or raping people (like I heard on the radio SMH) just have different needs and a different lifestyle.

    If I had a dollar for every time someone equated alternative lifestyles to rape I wouldn't have to work ever again. unimpressed.gif

    I know :grumble: People think it's ok to judge without knowing what it is. We don't actually walk around naked just getting it on, it's much more complex than that.

    Hahaha, I love when people think nudists and swingers are the same thing :laugh:

    I've actually heard of a nudist/ swinger camping around here, that must be so confusing to people :laugh:

    Also the perception that people on the fringe have no standards and will have sex with anyone. Also we're all sex addicts and our entire life revolves around getting our next lay even if we have to trick our partners into it.
  • MelodyinGa
    MelodyinGa Posts: 202 Member
    I'm not judging his lifestyle. We departed on friendly terms. I was just a bit shocked because he was talking about how important commitment in a relationship was.
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
    Hoping for more pics and stories now that this thread has taken a promising turn...

    --P
  • jenbit
    jenbit Posts: 4,252 Member
    I'm not judging his lifestyle. We departed on friendly terms. I was just a bit shocked because he was talking about how important commitment in a relationship was.

    you did judge his lifestyle quite verbally in this thread .. you just didn't judge it to his face



    Personally I've been intergued by the swingers lifestyle and wouldn't dismiss a man because of it
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    UPDATE: So, I asked him if he ever googled his email address. He said no, but then he did. I'm like are you bi? He's like NO, I LOVE WOMEN. Well, the site he is a member of is for swingers/cuckold (sp?). He wants to be with only one woman, but watch while she has sex with others guys! He said he was going to tell me he was a freak at the end of our first date! WTH? See ya!!!

    Speaking as someone with outside the "norm" fetishes, there is a way to be polite about not being interested in the same things as someone else. It doesn't make him a bad person, he isn't hurting anyone, it just means the two of you aren't a match. I'm sure there are aspects about you that might make someone else have a similar disgusted reaction - how would that make you feel?

    I have to agree with previous poster. I am a full on swinger, i'm not ashamed to admit it, it's my choice. If I weren't and met someone who's into it, I would just leave it at that. There's no space in this society to judge people with different lifestyles. It's a choice and it's not like i'm going to force anyone into that if they are not interested. And like him, I would probably tell a date at the end of the first date so I wasn't judge without him meeting me and also, to not waste his time if he's not interested into the lifestyle.

    We're not freaks or bad people, or raping people (like I heard on the radio SMH) just have different needs and a different lifestyle.

    If I had a dollar for every time someone equated alternative lifestyles to rape I wouldn't have to work ever again. unimpressed.gif

    I know :grumble: People think it's ok to judge without knowing what it is. We don't actually walk around naked just getting it on, it's much more complex than that.

    Hahaha, I love when people think nudists and swingers are the same thing :laugh:

    I've actually heard of a nudist/ swinger camping around here, that must be so confusing to people :laugh:

    Also the perception that people on the fringe have no standards and will have sex with anyone. Also we're all sex addicts and our entire life revolves around getting our next lay even if we have to trick our partners into it.

    care to elaborate or provide said clarifications of what this lifestyle is about? i'm not judging just curious.
  • TheKitsune6
    TheKitsune6 Posts: 5,798 Member
    care to elaborate or provide said clarifications of what this lifestyle is about? i'm not judging just curious.

    Do you mean us personally, or the lifestyle(s) as a whole? Honestly, everyone is just people going about everyday lives. Some of us just like to get spanked and some of us like to get a little strange and some of us are perfectly fine with once a month missionary. To each their own.

    I have no problem answering questions to satiate curiosity :) You can PM me if you want more details, per se. Or we can start a whole new topic and educate XD
  • flimflamfloz
    flimflamfloz Posts: 1,980 Member
    Hey Flim long time no see. The swingers topic pique your interest?
    Hello miss!
    Yes, like a phoenix of perversion, I reappear when the naughtiness level reach a certain threshold.
  • Temporalia
    Temporalia Posts: 1,151 Member
    I'm not judging his lifestyle. We departed on friendly terms. I was just a bit shocked because he was talking about how important commitment in a relationship was.

    There is commitment in a relationship between two swingers, they always come first to each other. Sex is detached from love in a way. Making love is what you do between partners, sex is what you do with other partners. You can be committed 100% mentally without being commited a 100% physically. What I mean is that it's a common agreement/ commitment between the partners, they make the rules and limits on what they want and they respect that. There's different level of swinging anyway.
  • Temporalia
    Temporalia Posts: 1,151 Member
    care to elaborate or provide said clarifications of what this lifestyle is about? i'm not judging just curious.

    Do you mean us personally, or the lifestyle(s) as a whole? Honestly, everyone is just people going about everyday lives. Some of us just like to get spanked and some of us like to get a little strange and some of us are perfectly fine with once a month missionary. To each their own.

    I have no problem answering questions to satiate curiosity :) You can PM me if you want more details, per se. Or we can start a whole new topic and educate XD

    :laugh: Starting a whole topic wouldn't be so bad, maybe people could understand it better
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    I'm not judging his lifestyle. We departed on friendly terms. I was just a bit shocked because he was talking about how important commitment in a relationship was.

    There is commitment in a relationship between two swingers, they always come first to each other. Sex is detached from love in a way. Making love is what you do between partners, sex is what you do with other partners. You can be committed 100% mentally without being commited a 100% physically. What I mean is that it's a common agreement/ commitment between the partners, they make the rules and limits on what they want and they respect that. There's different level of swinging anyway.

    ahhh I've heard something like this before on LA shrinks. they have been together forever, but not monogamous, just monogam-ish. i'm way too jealous to handle that lol.

Categories