glad to here it.

I quit drinking officially back in October 2011 and I think it is a wonderful thing that you are realizing maybe you want to slow down or stop.

Before I quit drinking was pretty much how I dealt with everything in my life- good, bad or indifferent. For example...Bored at night have a beer, one turned into 6 and hiding the evidence from my roommate. See that guy you like out at a bar or maybe even an ex with a new girl- time to nervous drink to get your feelings under control. The opposite usually happened with me though and I would end up embarrasing myself. Family event where people start asking about what your doing for work when you can't hold a steady job, drink some alcohol and be the funny girl to avoid the uncomfortable topics. Unfortunately, this went on for way too long for me. I would literally sleep away whole days with the hangovers and before I stopped I was getting black out drunk every night. What started out as going out with friends to take the edge off a hard day turned into an unconscious effort on my part to get blind drunk. So that's where I am coming from. Big family who all drink, mother used to drink a lot when I was younger and I swore I would never be like her. Funny how things happen...

I know that it is really hard in the beginning. I was never the kind of drinker who needed to have a drink, but when I did I was going to get drunk. i don't get people who can have one beer and feel satisfied. It's not that I love the taste so much, it's the buzz. It is so tied into every aspect of life. The longer you go without though the more normal and natural it becomes. It's not like you are giving up a vital nutrient or something. You can live without it. At first all I did was eat when I quit, replaced one bad habit with another but I didn't know how to cope. That's why I'm here now, lol! I would much rather be a chubby than drinking again, hands down any day. I get such a thrill now being up early and not hungover. I can't explain how it feels like a completely new world to me now. You look at things from a different perspective. As far as friends who still drink, that is fine with me- I just don't drink. It's like if they had an allergy to something, I'm not going to stop eating it just because they can't. People get used to it if they are your real friends. At first I found it difficult, but you really have to give yourself time to relearn how to socialize and be a person without it. Everyday it gets easier. I definitely stayed home a lot early on because social interactions were just plain overwhelming to me. Even now sometimes they are,but I have a good foundation to stand on with almost 11 months sober.

I don't know how you feel about AA, but I went to some meetings when I first started and I was so horrified to be there the first time I broke down in tears in the parking lot before going in. I couldn't believe I was going to be with a "bunch of drunks"- pot calling kettle black, but at the time I was a little out of control. It was the best thing in the world I could have done for myself though. It was eye opening to see that it wasn't a "bunch of drunks" but doctors, teachers, lawyers, and everyday people like myself. It gave me hope that things could get better and I was relatively normal! It's completely worth looking into in my opinion. Sorry this post is so longwinded and I hope it makes some sense. I just saw the group and was reading so figured I would share my story and offer a little hope that it can be done and it is worth it!! Please anyone reading this feel free to message me anytime! Stay strong if you really want to stop you absolutely can:happy:

I belong to AA. Relapsed over the weekend. I'm now on day 4.

Welcome back!