Self Sabotage!!
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lissa0040
Posts: 362 Member
Ok! I can't be the only one who struggles with this issue. If it isn't the food pushers of the world working against me or the special occasions throwing me off -- it is usually me SABOTAGING myself. Ugh. The lack of preparation and making bad choices for no apparent reason... it. is. exhausting. I am SO tired of beating myself up especially after a nice streak of doing well and working hard. I am trying to figure out what the heck my problem is that I seem to wipe out whenever I am on a roll. I don't do it on purpose and I logically think I am ready to change. But low and behold.. some way somehow I am putting food in my mouth that isn't authorized. Come on!! When is that switch in my head going to bleeping flip already? You've heard the stories.. the 300lb woman who woke up one day vowing she will not live another day in this body!! Um I can promise you there are times when I feel that strongly about it. Then there's other days when I am constantly reminding myself what my goals are and sometimes making the bad choice any way. I have not fallen off as of yet. I am still staying under and logging and working out but my choices aren't the greatest. I WILL lose 50lbs by the end of this year. I WILL keep losing week after week.Ever since I said those words I have been in a battle inside my own head .... man I have issues.
. Sigh. All I can do is take one day at a time. Not beat myself up when I am not perfect. Learn how to handle stress in a more productive way. Work as hard as I can and learn to be proud of my accomplishments. I will get the hang of this one day.I truly do believe that I deserve to be better, be happy, be healthy. And I do believe in myself and I know I can do this. (see I had to hit you with a little sunshine before this ended)
Rant Over.
. Sigh. All I can do is take one day at a time. Not beat myself up when I am not perfect. Learn how to handle stress in a more productive way. Work as hard as I can and learn to be proud of my accomplishments. I will get the hang of this one day.I truly do believe that I deserve to be better, be happy, be healthy. And I do believe in myself and I know I can do this. (see I had to hit you with a little sunshine before this ended)
Rant Over.
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Replies
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YES, I have been struggling so much with self sabatoge the last month. As of yesterday I just WON the biggest loser challenge at my gym, losing 24 pounds in the three month challenge, but the last month of it I've been struggling over five pounds!! I just can't seem to NOT eat things I shouldn't. I mean, I know I shouldn't, but then I do. I could be so much farther along if I just would eat what I should. My exercise is good (I could buck up on it a bit too, but it is pretty consistent) but my eating is all over the place. I am lazy, and I love food! I just sometimes want to eat what I want to eat. Sometimes I think I'm scared to be thin and healthy! I lost a considerable amount of weight once before (over 70 pounds) and after I did, my husband left me for another woman and tried to take my kids away in court. Some people have suggested that as silly as it seems, my resistance might be psychological in nature. ie: my last husband left me after losing all that weight... what if this husband leaves me too. My rational mind knows its ridiculous, but the subconcious is a tricky tricky thing. I don't know truthfully why it is I keep sabatoging myself, but I keep struggling through it, like you, trying to renew my mind and change the core of how I see food and fitness. It's a daily battle, but I intend to win it, one way or the other.0
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Oh my gosh, you are doing great---look at what you have lost! I am frustrated too----I seem to be stuck after 15 pound! I even cut my calories down to 1500 and not subtracting out exercise. It makes me want to eat----which is the circle that we all live with.
Keep on going ladies, one bad decision does not have to lead to more----accept it and move on. I am looking at your stats and being inspired!!!!:bigsmile:0 -
Hey Melissa, you have nailed it! I am my own worse enemy. Food is my go to choice whenever things get stressful. I am making better choices everyday and then BAM! A wrench is thrown into the plan and I run to what I know best...food and not the healthy good for my body food, no the junk food. I find this is especially true when I am upset or angry. I try to remind myself that the only person who is suffering is me. I have made a real conscious effort these past 2 weeks to be more mindful about how I am feeling when I eat. It is not easy but it has helped me to walk away from making more bad choices.
I am going on vacation tomorrow and I am nervous about staying on track. My friend that I am going with is really supportive, so that will help. I am bringing my iPad so I can keep tracking.
We all need to hang in there and keep talking through the rough spots.0 -
Oh my gosh, you are doing great---look at what you have lost! I am frustrated too----I seem to be stuck after 15 pound! I even cut my calories down to 1500 and not subtracting out exercise. It makes me want to eat----which is the circle that we all live with.
Keep on going ladies, one bad decision does not have to lead to more----accept it and move on. I am looking at your stats and being inspired!!!!:bigsmile:
Aw thanks! I know I do pat myself on the back for my achievements. Although I know making one bad choice isn't that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things my bad decisions usually spread to either wrecking the whole day or the entire week. It is really hard to control it when you let it go off track. Just gotta keep at it!0 -
I know the feeling. I am my own worst enemy too. I think a lot of it is psychological. I don't know about you, but I have turned to food for comfort for so long, I don't really know how to cope with things without it. I started seeing a therapist who is working with me specifically on better choices to break this food addiction. I also know that while I am usually over on my calories, I am still eating less than I did, and making better choices. Like instead of scarfing down the king size milky way, I indulge and eat a half of a regular one. I know I shouldn't eat it at all, but I am just not at the "cutting it all out" stage yet.
You are doing a great job, BTW. You help inspire me daily. I look at my friends' diaries, and think to myself that if you guys can do this, then I can do this too. Don't let those occasional slip-ups stop you. Just know that it happened, acknowledge it, and move on. If you dwell on it, you will just keep doing it and justifying to yourself.
Best wishes. We are here for you!0
