Soooooo........
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jenbit
Posts: 4,289 Member
Mr. Nice Guy and I had the TALK last night . Thats right talk is in big letters lol.
The conversation basically broke down to we are dating (no **** lol) . However even thoguh he said he is not dating anyone else right now we are not exclusive and if I wanted to date others it would be ok... (ITS a trap ) He did say if he was going on a date with someone else he would tell me first. :huh: Then he said hes still gonna call me his girl.
BTW Running on tons of coffee today so I'm feeling pretty weeeeee at this point :drinker:
The conversation basically broke down to we are dating (no **** lol) . However even thoguh he said he is not dating anyone else right now we are not exclusive and if I wanted to date others it would be ok... (ITS a trap ) He did say if he was going on a date with someone else he would tell me first. :huh: Then he said hes still gonna call me his girl.
BTW Running on tons of coffee today so I'm feeling pretty weeeeee at this point :drinker:
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What are your thoughts on that? Did you want to be just dating still or be more exclusive? For me, personally, I would not be happy about this situation.
Edited: I said committed, but I meant exclusive.0 -
Sorry Jen??? I dont get this :huh: Talk about leave your options open!!
You are definitely running high to consider this a 'talk'!! :laugh: Or am I losing the sarcasm in the TALK??0 -
How long have you been dating?? How often do you see him?0
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What are you thoughts on that? Did you want to be just dating still or be more committed? For me, personally, I would not be happy about this situation.
Actually considering I wasnt sure what the hell he thought we were doing I'm ok with just dating right now. We've really only been going out for a little under a month and honestly I dont want to rush into the BF/GF label thing...I was completely honest with him and told him that I've never actually dated anyone before I've always just been in relationships so dating for a little bit is fine with me.0 -
Sorry Jen??? I dont get this :huh: Talk about leave your options open!!
You are definitely running high to consider this a 'talk'!! :laugh: Or am I losing the sarcasm in the TALK??
No Anne this is kinda where I wanted it to go.. We are really just now getting to know each other. He initiated the conversation and brought up that we are dating. I brought up wether we were exclusive or not lol. I just didnt want him to take it for granted that we would be exclusive without a talk. I'm not sure he was trying to leave his options open lol but he knows he left mine open.0 -
Like you, I haven't really done dating before this year, just relationships, so it makes me uncomfortable to know the other person is still keeping their options open one month in. I would think by that time, I'm investing quite a bit of emotion into him, and if I know he is still actively looking around (open to going out on dates with other women like this), that might be a big problem for me. Maybe I'm a little old fashioned about this sort of thing, but it would really knock me for a loop if someone didn't want to date me exclusively at this point. I wouldn't need the girlfriend label, but just to know that he's not still actively shopping around.0
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I'm curious how this would even come up? It's not really THE talk... it's more like him saying that you're not at the point of the "talk".He initiated the conversation and brought up that we are dating. I brought up wether we were exclusive or not lol. I just didnt want him to take it for granted that we would be exclusive without a talk. I'm not sure he was trying to leave his options open lol but he knows he left mine open.0 -
I'm curious how this would even come up? It's not really THE talk... it's more like him saying that you're not at the point of the "talk".He initiated the conversation and brought up that we are dating. I brought up wether we were exclusive or not lol. I just didnt want him to take it for granted that we would be exclusive without a talk. I'm not sure he was trying to leave his options open lol but he knows he left mine open.
I think I'm writing this wrong so it loses something.
He asked me where I saw us and I said "dating"
He then said but not at the point of BF/GF right and I agreed .
He then said that he really likes me but doesnt want to rush it.
I asked him if we were exclusive or not and His responce was that He wasnt dating anyone else and didn't plan on dating anyone else BUt if he did go on a date with someone else (the example he used was an old friend) He would tell me before it happened.
I told him the reason I wanted to know was because other males who had expressed interest in me wanted to know what was going on and I wouldnt have know what to tell them proir to this conversation. He then told me that he is still introducing me/calling me his girl lol..
I honestly thought it went well I'm not ready to be BF/GF yet. I always jump in without thinking about it and it usually ends badly. This time taking it slow is ok with me.0 -
That sounds different than how it played out in my head from reading the OP. It sounds like you two are on the same page at least.
What does that mean for you? Will you go out with one of the other men who have expressed interest in you now? How would you really feel if he told you he was going out on a date with an old friend. I think I would be gutted if I was told something like that after a month of dating someone. Different strokes for different folks, I guess.0 -
That sounds different than how it played out in my head from reading the OP. It sounds like you two are on the same page at least.
Thats why I rewrote it I felt like I was giving him a bad rap lol.... I'm wondering where all our male MFPers are with there opinions0 -
He wants to keep hanging out or humping or where ever he's at with you... but keep searching for better (in his opinion). At least that's how I read it.0
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I'm curious how this would even come up? It's not really THE talk... it's more like him saying that you're not at the point of the "talk".He initiated the conversation and brought up that we are dating. I brought up wether we were exclusive or not lol. I just didnt want him to take it for granted that we would be exclusive without a talk. I'm not sure he was trying to leave his options open lol but he knows he left mine open.
I think I'm writing this wrong so it loses something.
He asked me where I saw us and I said "dating"
He then said but not at the point of BF/GF right and I agreed .
He then said that he really likes me but doesnt want to rush it.
I asked him if we were exclusive or not and His responce was that He wasnt dating anyone else and didn't plan on dating anyone else BUt if he did go on a date with someone else (the example he used was an old friend) He would tell me before it happened.
I told him the reason I wanted to know was because other males who had expressed interest in me wanted to know what was going on and I wouldnt have know what to tell them proir to this conversation. He then told me that he is still introducing me/calling me his girl lol..
I honestly thought it went well I'm not ready to be BF/GF yet. I always jump in without thinking about it and it usually ends badly. This time taking it slow is ok with me.
I dont really understand the American way. Here, if you like someone you have a relationship with them. There is no middle ground. There is no talk. There is just a case of it working out or not, to be determined within the throws of that relationship.
But you sound happy enough, so I guess he is too :flowerforyou:0 -
I dont really understand the American way. Here, if you like someone you have a relationship with them. There is no middle ground. There is no talk. There is just a case of it working out or not, to be determined within the throws of that relationship.
But you sound happy enough, so I guess he is too :flowerforyou:
Um, not sure this is the American way or not. It sounds to me like he's just not that into you. But he's got no other alternatives at the moment, so whatever.
But maybe that's where you are in the relationship, as well?
In any case, if it works for you, great.
--P0 -
Have you read "act like a lady, think like a man"? Me either, but I've read a small section of it which was talking about sport fishing and some other kind of fishing. Basically he said if the guy tells you its ok to see other people, he's just sport fishing. If he doesn't like the idea of you seeing other people, he thinks you're a keeper.0
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Apperantly everyone took this differently than I did lol. I took this as a good thing now I'm confused :huh:0
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What you described sounds like an open relationship to me.0
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Apperantly everyone took this differently than I did lol. I took this as a good thing now I'm confused :huh:
Like porcelain_dol said it's an open relationship, if that is what you want then it's a good thing, if not then you better have the "talk" again.
I guess I only see two reasons for an open relationship, you're swingers, or you're looking for something better.0 -
I also took it as a good thing. But I understand you. I always understand you. I think that's why I'm normally an outcast in this group. I'm going to post a topic soon so we shall see.
It's been a month. One month. 4 weeks. Well maybe 5 since August was a long month. I think it's a good progression.0 -
Apperantly everyone took this differently than I did lol. I took this as a good thing now I'm confused :huh:
Like porcelain_dol said it's an open relationship, if that is what you want then it's a good thing, if not then you better have the "talk" again.
I guess I only see two reasons for an open relationship, you're swingers, or you're looking for something better.
Or you're looking for something better through swinging. To each their own.0 -
I think he was fishing to see if you were wanting to date exclusively or not. When he said that he would tell you if he had another date, like with an old friend, did he actually mean date or just meet for dinner and catch up? I would be more worried if he said he wanted to date new people then go out with an old friend. There are too many holes here to really say what he was meaning. A lot could be taken by his body language in this conversation that we cannot determine.0
