First date ideas/free or little cost suggestions.
Jarnard
Posts: 497 Member
What are some first date ideas that cost no or little money? I've suggested hiking to some but I think hiking can be a little weird at first. I've suggested going on social jogs by the beach or somewhere scenic and slightly crowded.
Any ideas?
Jarnard
Any ideas?
Jarnard
0
Replies
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- bring her as a guest to your gym and play a sport, then take her out for a coffee after
- rather than going hiking, go on a walk in a public place, like a popular lake, and then go for smoothies or ice cream after.
- a local sporting event, like a high school football game or hockey game. tickets are usually only 5 bucks each.
- if you volunteer anywhere, bring her with you. a great place to volunteer is Feed My Starving Children. It's fun and you're helping a good cause.
I think, honestly, you might have to drop a little money on dates just to make an impression, but that doesn't mean you have to take her out for a fifty dollar meal.0 -
These are all great ideas! I like the sporting event and volunteering. That could be fun! You're right.. for first date impressions, you will have to drop a few bucks.
Jarnard0 -
I think it depends on the size of your city. The smaller it is, the less likely there are to be free/ low cost options, imo.
Another few I've done:
1- Movies, Shakespeare, or Symphony in the park. Free but you can bring or buy snacks. Movies aren't always a great first date, but these are easier since it's open air and you can still talk/ interact a little.
2- I've been to several free/ cheap exhibits/ museum openings.
3- A few of my friends planned activities with their pets, even as simple as a walk or time at a dog park.
4- If you know they like wine, tastings are fun and normally under $15 per person.
My friends and I use Charlotte on the Cheap to find ideas for free/ cheap activities! Maybe there are such websites near you!0 -
What are some first date ideas that cost no or little money? I've suggested hiking to some but I think hiking can be a little weird at first. I've suggested going on social jogs by the beach or somewhere scenic and slightly crowded.
Any ideas?
Jarnard
Why not just invite her to your place on the first date? Have her pick up a cheap bottle of wine on her way over. Free for you, minimal costs on her end. Done and done.0 -
What are some first date ideas that cost no or little money? I've suggested hiking to some but I think hiking can be a little weird at first. I've suggested going on social jogs by the beach or somewhere scenic and slightly crowded.
Any ideas?
Jarnard
Why not just invite her to your place on the first date? Have her pick up a cheap bottle of wine on her way over. Free for you, minimal costs on her end. Done and done.
Seriously unless I knew a man well...I would never venture to his place on a first date.
If I knew him that well that's fine..I'd also know that he was broke and take it pretty easy on my expectations of a first date.0 -
My favourite free (or inexpensive) date ideas include picnics in the park, outings to a local farmer's market, bike rides around town, and going to a museum. I also really enjoy local festivals, like October-fest, or fall harvest festivals because they usually have good (and often free) music which can be fun.
If you live near (or in) a big city, you might also want to look into something called UrbanQuests (http://www.urbanquest.com/). It's a company that sells urban scavenger hunts. The quests themselves cost around 20$, but if you have a friend who would also like doing it, you can print them off as many times as you'd like and re-do them (thus splitting the cost). As an added bonus (though you can only do it once), you can set the quest as such that upon successfully completing it, you are directed to your "prize", which can be either lunch or dinner reservations at a local pub or restaurant. A free alternative to this would be to make your own scavenger hunt around town.0 -
What are some first date ideas that cost no or little money? I've suggested hiking to some but I think hiking can be a little weird at first. I've suggested going on social jogs by the beach or somewhere scenic and slightly crowded.
Any ideas?
Jarnard
Why not just invite her to your place on the first date? Have her pick up a cheap bottle of wine on her way over. Free for you, minimal costs on her end. Done and done.
LOL Mike!!!! Nice style!0 -
Well Jarnard, you are lucky that you are in San Diego, where the weather is sunny everyday and there's usually a moderate temperature of 65-75. Why not suggest a walk along Mission or Pacific Beaches on a weekend afternoon/early evening up until sunset and a drink at one of the ocean side bars? That's an easy $15 or less date to take up 60-90 minutes.0
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Why not just invite her to your place on the first date? Have her pick up a cheap bottle of wine on her way over. Free for you, minimal costs on her end. Done and done.
LOL Mike!!!! Nice style!
Well, I suppose Jarnard didn't say he was looking to make sure there was a second date?! :laugh: I'd be suspicious of any girl willing to do this without at first meeting in public, haha...
Not to be crude, but are you the same guy, Mike, who says, "just let me put it in a little..." HAHAHAHA...hope it works for you... POT STIRRER!0 -
Not to be crude, but are you the same guy, Mike, who says, "just let me put it in a little..." HAHAHAHA...hope it works for you... POT STIRRER!
Yup, that'd be me. "Come on girl.. just an inch for just a second" :laugh:0 -
What are some first date ideas that cost no or little money? I've suggested hiking to some but I think hiking can be a little weird at first. I've suggested going on social jogs by the beach or somewhere scenic and slightly crowded.
Any ideas?
Jarnard
Why not just invite her to your place on the first date? Have her pick up a cheap bottle of wine on her way over. Free for you, minimal costs on her end. Done and done.
I wouldn't go to a guy's house until I knew him well. Smart later on, but a no-no for the first dates.0 -
Be care about doing the "free dates", like going to the park and stuff like that. Some women can be very judgemental and might write you off as being a complete cheapskate and run for the hills.
Your best bet is saving your money and be selective on who you decide to take out on a date. When you do have the opportunity to take out a girl you truly like, then take her somewhere nice, like a nice wine bar.0 -
Be care about doing the "free dates", like going to the park and stuff like that. Some women can be very judgemental and might write you off as being a complete cheapskate and run for the hills.
Your best bet is saving your money and be selective on who you decide to take out on a date. When you do have the opportunity to take out a girl you truly like, then take her somewhere nice, like a nice wine bar.
That's why I suggested free stuff, coupled by a small token, like a 3 dollar cup of coffee, or a 4 dollar scoop of fro-yo. It's appreciative of the date but it's not a fifty dollar meal!0 -
I will probably get jumped on for this but why is is considered okay for a lady to look for a monetary expenditure as a qualifier for acceptance?
It seems to boil down to "spend money on me and I will consider liking you".
While I am very happy to do that with a lady I like,if it becomes a test (as I have said here before) without appreciation then I probably don`t want you as a lady.
Just go into it folks with an open mind to get to know the person and whether it is a guy with looking for sex or a woman assigning emotional value to money spent you need to let it go.0 -
I will probably get jumped on for this but why is is considered okay for a lady to look for a monetary expenditure as a qualifier for acceptance?
It seems to boil down to "spend money on me and I will consider liking you".
While I am very happy to do that with a lady I like,if it becomes a test (as I have said here before) without appreciation then I probably don`t want you as a lady.
Just go into it folks with an open mind to get to know the person and whether it is a guy with looking for sex or a woman assigning emotional value to money spent you need to let it go.
To me, there are a couple of reasons.
1) It is generally said that it is easier for a woman to find a date than a man, just because a lot of men want sex. I have said this before, but if a woman went to the middle of a crowded room and said, "I want someone to have sex with/date" quite a few men would most likely jump. But the same is not true if a man were to do the same thing, most likely no one would respond. So that goes to show that the woman generally holds the sexual power. She decides when she does and does not want to have sex.
2) Because women are perceived to have more dating choices, whether that is true or not (not true in my life, but true in other womens' lives) men have to distinguish themselves from the crowd. They do this by planning a good date and woo-ing the woman, because the woman holds the power in the relationship., even if it isn't obvious. It is her choice when to have sex with them. It sucks. But it is all biology in my opinion.
This is just off the top of my head.
ETA - Quick googling this shows the following.
"See sometimes it's not about money, it's just about feeling valued and some women attach how frequently (if at all) a man will be seen in public with her as a way to measure how much he values the relationship."
"The first two months provide guys the opportunity to prove they’re solvent, capable and understand the social conventions of dating -- and all are three important qualities ladies will be looking for in a date."0 -
I will probably get jumped on for this but why is is considered okay for a lady to look for a monetary expenditure as a qualifier for acceptance?
It seems to boil down to "spend money on me and I will consider liking you".
While I am very happy to do that with a lady I like,if it becomes a test (as I have said here before) without appreciation then I probably don`t want you as a lady.
Just go into it folks with an open mind to get to know the person and whether it is a guy with looking for sex or a woman assigning emotional value to money spent you need to let it go.
**Throws Carl a flame!!! :noway:
It's nothing to do with spending money ON her for acceptance :grumble: Many women in here have said many times that they have no issue with simple, cheap dates!!
On the practical side, money does become an issue, but that is more to do with lifestyle and compatibility down the line! So, if I have a good salary and I like going out for drinks and meals and love weekends away etc, I'm going to want to be with a guy that wants and can afford that type of lifestyle too. A guy on the dole (welfare) isnt going to be able to do that.
Still, that has nothing to do with the act of a guy paying. TBH, as I've said a million times on here, I always offer to pay my way. But some guys can be insulted by that offer. So, the 'tradition' of a guy paying is more a 'gentlemanly' act rather than a 'monetary' one.
Although, I do recognise there are gold digging women in the world, so I'm not speaking for those :flowerforyou:0 -
Yes, Anna, I agree, it's not about acceptance.
Also just saw this. Not saying I agree but it's different.
"I cannot stand men who complain about women. I mean, sure, you can’t live with them, and you can’t live without them, amiright? But let me tell you, successful businessmen never complain about how hard it is to make money, they just do. Mountaineers don’t complain about the summit. Chuck Yeager didn’t complain about how high he had to fly. Likewise, it just isn’t manly to complain about women the way Augustus Gloop complains about not enough chocolate. This world is nothing without women. It would be an absolute flavorless, pointless void. Men don’t complain. We bravely endure, pursue, and woo."
Bolded by me.0 -
What are some first date ideas that cost no or little money? I've suggested hiking to some but I think hiking can be a little weird at first. I've suggested going on social jogs by the beach or somewhere scenic and slightly crowded.
Any ideas?
Jarnard
Why not just invite her to your place on the first date? Have her pick up a cheap bottle of wine on her way over. Free for you, minimal costs on her end. Done and done.
That's a great idea. If he's dating a hooker, someone with incredibly low self esteem or a woman only wanting a one night stand. Geeze.0 -
I will probably get jumped on for this but why is is considered okay for a lady to look for a monetary expenditure as a qualifier for acceptance?
It seems to boil down to "spend money on me and I will consider liking you".
While I am very happy to do that with a lady I like,if it becomes a test (as I have said here before) without appreciation then I probably don`t want you as a lady.
Just go into it folks with an open mind to get to know the person and whether it is a guy with looking for sex or a woman assigning emotional value to money spent you need to let it go.
To me, there are a couple of reasons.
1) It is generally said that it is easier for a woman to find a date than a man, just because a lot of men want sex. I have said this before, but if a woman went to the middle of a crowded room and said, "I want someone to have sex with/date" quite a few men would most likely jump. But the same is not true if a man were to do the same thing, most likely no one would respond. So that goes to show that the woman generally holds the sexual power. She decides when she does and does not want to have sex.
2) Because women are perceived to have more dating choices, whether that is true or not (not true in my life, but true in other womens' lives) men have to distinguish themselves from the crowd. They do this by planning a good date and woo-ing the woman, because the woman holds the power in the relationship., even if it isn't obvious. It is her choice when to have sex with them. It sucks. But it is all biology in my opinion.
This is just off the top of my head.
ETA - Quick googling this shows the following.
"See sometimes it's not about money, it's just about feeling valued and some women attach how frequently (if at all) a man will be seen in public with her as a way to measure how much he values the relationship."
"The first two months provide guys the opportunity to prove they’re solvent, capable and understand the social conventions of dating -- and all are three important qualities ladies will be looking for in a date."
I am not quite sure how to respond as neither 1 or 2 casts a very positive light on ladies.
It will forever be a mystery to me the seeming number of qualifiers people,male or female,set up as barriers to finding happiness for themselves..0 -
I don't think it casts a negative light at all. It's not like this power is blatantly obvious it is just there. A woman can most likely find sex easily, even if she and her partner are not too good looking. But I don't think the same is true for men. Even though I've not had much dating experience, I can name you off several men that I could've gone home with and had sex with if i wanted. They might not have wanted to date me or been seen in public with me, but they would've had sex with me. I think the same is true for my girlfriends. But my guy friends probably wouldn't say the same. One of my girlfriends has had one boyfriend, and hardly goes on real dates, but she has had sex with over 15 guys.
Women generally also choose the sexual timeline in the relationship, whether it is on the first date or their wedding night. You never hear a guy say "yeah I want to wait for sex until the fifth date but she wants to do it now." But you hear that kinda stuff from women.0 -
I'd just try to find events going on... Maybe go to the zoo. I don't think that costs too much.
I don't know what kind of stuff that your area has, but you could look for fall stuff. Like Harvest Festivals, apple picking, hay rides, haunted houses. These things all tend to be relatively cheap and super fun! Just find something fun to do, and engage her in it. If it's fun, it will be memorable, if it's memorable then better dates will follow.0 -
I will probably get jumped on for this but why is is considered okay for a lady to look for a monetary expenditure as a qualifier for acceptance?
It seems to boil down to "spend money on me and I will consider liking you".
While I am very happy to do that with a lady I like,if it becomes a test (as I have said here before) without appreciation then I probably don`t want you as a lady.
Just go into it folks with an open mind to get to know the person and whether it is a guy with looking for sex or a woman assigning emotional value to money spent you need to let it go.
I really hate to do this, but I have to agree with the ladies on here.
From the beginning of time that man has been around, it's been the men's job to 'woo' the woman. Thousands of years ago, men use to fight to the death to get a woman's attention, now all we need to do is buy her a few drinks. Much easier by today's standards.
I have to agree though, women who are constantly courted by men have a build up sense of self entitlement where they think every man, who stands a chance with them, needs to buy them stuff. I've encountered these women in my life and have gladly put them in their place.0 -
I will probably get jumped on for this but why is is considered okay for a lady to look for a monetary expenditure as a qualifier for acceptance?
It seems to boil down to "spend money on me and I will consider liking you".
While I am very happy to do that with a lady I like,if it becomes a test (as I have said here before) without appreciation then I probably don`t want you as a lady.
Just go into it folks with an open mind to get to know the person and whether it is a guy with looking for sex or a woman assigning emotional value to money spent you need to let it go.
**Throws Carl a flame!!! :noway:
It's nothing to do with spending money ON her for acceptance :grumble: Many women in here have said many times that they have no issue with simple, cheap dates!!
Yes, this.
Some of my favorite dates (and a few awful ones) were a walk around town or by the local river, park, etc. with a simple cup of coffee. And a few where my dog tagged along even! How much money a guy spends has no impact on how I feel about him...if anything I will be rather uncomfortable if he spends a lot (call me the opposite of a gold digger I guess :laugh:).
Free might be hard to maintain just because it will be harder to find activities that don't cost anything, but it can be done if you keep your eyes open for local events and festivals. Or check our local university listings too. But if nothing else, going for coffee is still acceptable, as is ice cream, bowling, or museum visits, etc...
Janard, This is a great topic!0 -
These are great suggestions and ideas for dates.
Of course I'm not going to ask the woman over to my house on the first date, unless she's an escort, haha.
I do live in a big city, therefore, there are a lot of options, however, a bigger city can mean expensive dining.
I like the zoo and outdoor idea, however, that only attracts a certain type of woman.
I have came across women who were more materialistic and wanted to do things on a higher scale. I don't mind that but that's not me. I can't financially handle that lifestyle, therefore, I tend to go for more down to Earth and simple women.
Coffee dates are fun too..however, that gets old and typical.. I would like to switch it up. I do like the idea that DM was mentioning, hitting up the boardwalk at the beach and perhaps grabbing a drink afterwards.
In conclusion, I think I have to do my research before offering to take a women out because some dates I end up spending over $50 - $75 on average.
There has been dates under $20 which is cool but some have been very pricey for it not to go anywhere..
I'm not trying to be "cheap" but I'm not trying to spend a great amount of money on dates, considering the chances of it being a second date.
If money is an issue for me, then perhaps I should not date until my finances are right, but on my opinion, it's pretty decent where I am able to go out and date a little.
Thanks again for the advice!
Perhaps I'll post my first date on here. Wish me luck on Okcupid. HAHA.
Jarnard0 -
My favourite free (or inexpensive) date ideas include picnics in the park, outings to a local farmer's market, bike rides around town, and going to a museum. I also really enjoy local festivals, like October-fest, or fall harvest festivals because they usually have good (and often free) music which can be fun.
If you live near (or in) a big city, you might also want to look into something called UrbanQuests (http://www.urbanquest.com/). It's a company that sells urban scavenger hunts. The quests themselves cost around 20$, but if you have a friend who would also like doing it, you can print them off as many times as you'd like and re-do them (thus splitting the cost). As an added bonus (though you can only do it once), you can set the quest as such that upon successfully completing it, you are directed to your "prize", which can be either lunch or dinner reservations at a local pub or restaurant. A free alternative to this would be to make your own scavenger hunt around town.
Oktober fest is right around the corner.. That's a good idea. I could take a date there and perhaps grab a drink or two there. Scavenger hunt could be a cool group date idea.
Thanks!
Jarnard0 -
Check groupon.
They usually have deals for act ivies you can use. When you use the coupon just don't be obvious about using it. Also some of the coupons you can redeem online so the date would never even know.0 -
If that's not you, then don't pursue them to begin with because what will you really have in common anyway?I have came across women who were more materialistic and wanted to do things on a higher scale. I don't mind that but that's not me. I can't financially handle that lifestyle, therefore, I tend to go for more down to Earth and simple women.
I definitely don't see a discussion of this topic as anyone being cheap, it's just realistic. That said, I would not hold off on dating until your finances are set (unless you are in huge amounts of debt maybe). The right woman will just want to spend time with you and what you spend won't matter. :flowerforyou:I'm not trying to be "cheap" but I'm not trying to spend a great amount of money on dates, considering the chances of it being a second date.
If money is an issue for me, then perhaps I should not date until my finances are right, but on my opinion, it's pretty decent where I am able to go out and date a little.0
