Swearing.. yea or nay?

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  • dbrightwell1270
    dbrightwell1270 Posts: 1,732 Member
    I like the article, very funny.
    Personally I find TOO MUCH cursing from male or female to be unattractive and shows lack of intelligence..

    I used to think this way. I work with a group that is full of PhDs, CPAs, PEs, and the like. Everyone is a subject matter expert who often has to testify as an expert witness in Administrative hearings and everyone of us can carry ourselves in a professional manner. However, almost every meeting and every lunch gathering turns into an f-bomb laden argument. The only ones who aren't cussing up a storm are usually the less knowledgeable, less educated employees who can't stand up to the scrutiny.

    As far as outside of work, I usually think it provides a poor presentation of oneself. To some degree, it's a case that the fundamental rule of effective communication is to know your audience.
  • Sarah_Wins
    Sarah_Wins Posts: 955 Member
    Fu(k yeah, I swear EVERYWHERE.
  • Sarah_Wins
    Sarah_Wins Posts: 955 Member
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  • I work in the classroom with a bunch of 8th graders. I am not a frequent swearer anyway, but I have been known to let one slip here and there. I accidentally let one slip in class the other day, and my students laughed. They know I'm human. It's okay.

    Personally, if someone swears a lot or every other word, I wonder about his/her vocabulary. I agree that sometimes nothing will quite fit in a situation other than a particular curse word. However, if one is dropping F bombs in every sentence, I wonder about his/her intellect. I prefer to be around those who can be more creative and more precise in their wording.

    P.S. I didn't read your article. And I am not trying to offend anyone. These are just my personal thoughts and opinions. Just like *kitten*, we all have them, right. lol (Yes, I do realize what I did.)
  • castadiva
    castadiva Posts: 2,018 Member
    Personally, if someone swears a lot or every other word, I wonder about his/her vocabulary. I agree that sometimes nothing will quite fit in a situation other than a particular curse word. However, if one is dropping F bombs in every sentence, I wonder about his/her intellect. I prefer to be around those who can be more creative and more precise in their wording.

    This. And this, too:
    I'm more likely to swear when angry/upset/passionate/drunk!

    In general, I try to avoid swearing - or at least anything other than very mild expletives. I don't always succeed in private (and a few spicier words may creep in when I'm really angry or upset) but would never swear at my day-job, in public or on a date, beyond something very, very mild, and depending on the atmosphere and situation - it seems highly inappropriate to me to do so, and discourteous to others who might overhear. I might occasionally swear in rehearsals, but the atmosphere in a rehearsal room is usually fairly intimate and quite relaxed in regards to most standard etiquette (and almost always adults-only).

    I dislike the indiscriminate use of ugly and imprecise language that has seemingly become a part of our 'culture', and I have to admit I probably do wince more when I hear women lacing their speech with unnecessary and meaningless profanity than when I hear the same from men, though both make me cringe. I don't however see being ladylike and being liberated as mutually exclusive, which shapes my views on this, as well as other issues.

    Until the last few, very difficult, years, I had never heard my mother - a very, very liberated lady - swear, beyond the mildest of expletives, and my father only rarely, so my tolerance is low and had to be built up when I went to music college! As an occasional emphasis, and used in consideration of appropriate time and place, I have learned to let foul language roll off my shoulders. From a potential date, though, a stream of foul language, or an every-other-word situation would be a turn-off the balancing of which would take a LOT of positives.
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    I don't swear, ever. Haven't in 20 years. I understand that most people today swear (even some church folks) because "they're just words." But for some reason, even the "tamer" curse words annoy me.

    I don't have a problem with friends/forum/etc cursing, but I don't want hard language in my home so I would have trouble settling down with someone who can't control their language. If a guy tells me he can't stop cursing around me, I note that more often than not his language cleans up amazingly around his mom. So it's not a "can't" but a "won't."

    I can't expect anyone to live a lifetime restraining themselves, so I quickly free up cusses to find a woman more tolerant. BB and I are now to the point where we're spending almost every day together. I know that he cusses when I'm not around because he tells me stories of convos with his friends but will qualify with "but in stronger language" but he does not cuss around me. I can handle that.
  • MissingMinnesota
    MissingMinnesota Posts: 7,486 Member
    The thing to me is not all swearing is the same to everyone. I am more offended when someone says "bless your heart" then when someone says "fu%k you" since I can't stand that passive agressive crap.

    I do have a story to share though. When I was about 20 I was working at subway and was up front doing inventory. I said something like "oh hell, we are out of ..." to myself, I was bent down looking in a cabinet and had no clue people were in line. One of the customers got PISSED and went off on me on how I was disrespecting her and I shouldn't be swearing in front of customers. Really I had no clue what she was talking about as I don't even consider hell a swear word. She went off on me for a good 15 mins and I just kept saying "I am sorry but I don't remember swearing, what did I say?" It took her that long to tell me what I said that offended her.

    Moral of this story is what might not offend you might offend the person next to you and you don't even know it.
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    The thing to me is not all swearing is the same to everyone. I am more offended when someone says "bless your heart" ....since I can't stand that passive aggressive crap.

    Absolutely!!!



    Here's what I REALLY don't understand: WHY is it that people who DO curse (and curse a LOT) judge other people for cursing? Even some women judge other women for cursing. Seems very hypocritical to me.
  • toots99
    toots99 Posts: 3,794 Member
    I consider myself a casual cusser. I don't think about swearing, if it just seems to fit then it happens all on its own. As a receptionist I do not swear within hearing of the owner of the company (who has the office RIGHT next to me) and not in front of my boss (unless we're at an office party) and certainly not in hearing range of customers. Everyone else knows I have a filthy mouth and no one has yet complained about it. IF someone does, I will no longer swear in front of them. I also do not swear in front of children, unless they're in a PG-13 environment anyway (Oh, you brought your three-year-old kid to the new batman movie? Yeah, welcome to the real world kiddo). That's the parents choice, not mine.

    I have no problem with swearing, and if someone (that I care about for one reason or another) asks me not to swear and I find it a reasonable request then I do stop around that person. I do not judge people for not swearing.

    I do not swear (as much) if I am having a serious debate because I feel like saying "politicians" or "taxes" (and other comparable terms) covers enough dirty language for me.

    I am pretty much the same. Depends on who I'm with and who's around ,me. I don't ever, ever, ever curse in front of family, though all the guys in my family let the f bomb fly every other word.

    I don't really do it in front of new people until I'm closer to being friends with them. And once we're friends, oh it's on.

    One time I was at the gym, and there were two guys next to each other on the treadmill loudly cursing away. Worst part was, there was an older lady next to them. It made me so angry that I suddenly went up to them and said "Excuse me, you're cursing very often and very loudly. Do you realize there's a lady next to you here? Show some respect and watch your language!" and scurried off once I realized I'd spoken up. :laugh:
  • zachatta
    zachatta Posts: 1,364 Member
    Topic has been beat to death but I will help beat it to death?

    I think worrying about words is ridiculous.

    That being said, if someone is really offended by it, i tend

    to clean up my language, just to be nice.
  • castadiva
    castadiva Posts: 2,018 Member
    I suppose it's worth qualifying by saying that, like MissingMinnesota, I don''t consider 'hell', 'damn' etc to be problematic/offensive/really 'swearing'. Some people do, I know - perhaps more so in the US than here? I had a teacher who once told the class that "drat" was as emphatic an expletive as any lady ought to use! Even my tolerance levels go a little further than that! :laugh:
  • Moe4572
    Moe4572 Posts: 1,431 Member
    I am not someone who swears alot, unless I am all riled up about something. But, never in front of parents/aunts/uncles----although they all do, I just don't! But, not offended by those that do--if in moderation. I was married to a sailor, so I did hear some "interesting" rants, but don't think I learned any new words.

    That being said, the guy I am with now is not someone who swears alot either. Last weekend, we were at a family bday party and my cousin has a mouth worse than the worst you have heard, and he did comment later on it. He said to me......"She knows why she is single, right? With that mouth, she will be single for life!" Kind of interesting.........