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chemalurgy
chemalurgy Posts: 48 Member
I am a mother and grandmother. I've studied religion and history for many years (including comparative religion in college). I was formerally a church pianist and Sunday School teacher, but began to question the beliefs of the churches after leaders couldn't answer basic questions from the Bible. Because of this I embarked on my own to find the truth. I am now an athiest as are many former religious teachers and leaders.
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  • dan95130
    dan95130 Posts: 78 Member
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    I tried to be a believer because of peer pressure. After a sincere effort I concluded there isn't anything there. I don't get in anyone's face to accept my belief/dis-belief and I don't tolerate anyone getting in my face with their belief. Jesus said "love thy neighbor as thyself." I live that, I wish my theist friends would as well.
  • chemalurgy
    chemalurgy Posts: 48 Member
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    I tried to be a believer because of peer pressure. After a sincere effort I concluded there isn't anything there. I don't get in anyone's face to accept my belief/dis-belief and I don't tolerate anyone getting in my face with their belief. Jesus said "love thy neighbor as thyself." I live that, I wish my theist friends would as well.

    We have something in common. I went to church because I live in the bible belt and it's what we were raised to do. I didn't know anyone who wasn't a Christian. I finally began waking up when a couple moved into town who were athiests and the churches harassed them with "invitations" to services so they could be "saved". It just didn't seem right.

    Since then I've travelled a lot more and met people of all religions and cultures. I believe that people have value regardless of their beliefs or lack thereof.

    Thank you so much for sharing!
  • njean888
    njean888 Posts: 399 Member
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    Hi there. Thanks for the invite. I grew up catholic, everything from Sunday school to my communion and confirmation. I always questioned believing blindly in something just because its what everyone else believed. My very catholic father passed away last year. My relatives say that I'm angry and lashing out but they are wrong. I felt this way before my father ever became ill. But I needed to suck it up and not put fear into a dying mind with my lack of beliefs. His death was sad and sad still because I know there is no heaven and I will never see him again.
  • beccyleigh
    beccyleigh Posts: 847 Member
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    I grew up in London & religion doesn't play such a big part in our lives as it seems to in US & especially the bible belt states.

    It is always somewhat of a shock to discover someone you know is religious as it (religion or lack of) just isn't a coversational piece & people do not generally push their beleifs in your face. There are a couple of born agains at work who are a bit preachy but they know better than to go too far (we have laws against that sort of thing) but I figure it is like getting a new car, they want to show off about it somewhat & will calm down once the novelty wears off, hopefully.

    The biggest shock to me recently was discovering that there are creationists in the UK. I thought that was an American thing, so I live & learn. I just hope none of them come in contact with my son as I am all tolerant of faith but not of stupid.!

    I went to a CoE school, grew up with bible stories, hymns & prayer at assembly but my family are not religious so it wasn't a factor at home. I travelled extensively & married a thai buddhist, buddhism isn't really a religion, he lives his faith & doesn't attend temple except for days to give thanks for ancestors or when someone dies, thai buddhist funerals are about as far removed from the Judao/christian process as you can imagine.

    Our 5 year old son goes to a Christian school but is also exposed to Buddhism & no one discusses religion at all at home.

    He is free to chose what, if any, religion he wants to beleive in once he is older but i have to admit I will be a bit dissapointed if he becomes fundemental about it but for me beleiving in a god just wasn't a factor, not something I even questioned, it is just so implausable verging on the ridiculous that I couldn't beleive in any of it even if I really wanted to.
  • thektturner
    thektturner Posts: 228 Member
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    I grew up in Indiana (still live in the state, but not in the same town) and I went to a Methodist church with my mother and grandmother. I think my siblings went as well when I was very young, but I have no memory of that. I continued going until I was about 12, mainly because we always went out for breakfast and shopping afterward. And I loved my grandma.
    However, I don't think I ever really believed and I never really thought about it much. I knew one Jehova's Witness when I was a kid. Otherwise, no one really talked about religion.
    Once I actually thought about it, I knew I didn't have faith that any of those stories I was taught in Sunday school were true. They were just stories. Just like The Phantom Tolbooth, Wrinkle in Time, The Hobbit, etc.
    It wasn't until I was about 20 years old that anyone ever got snotty with me for being an atheist. Mostly, I try to avoid the subject and unless asked directly, don't tell people that I am an atheist.
    I find it funny, however, that I have been harrassed for being an atheist much more than any religious person I know has ever been harrassed for having their specific beliefs. I was told 1) there was no point to my marriage because I didn't believe in God (2) That I *would* believe in God someday because something bas would happen to me (the example given was that I would have a child who would die - how Christian is that to wish on someone?!) (3) that I'm going to Hell. Everyone has probably gotten the last one. My response is always "How can I go somewhere that doesn't exist?" :) I can be flippant when provoked.

    I just find that 90% of the educated people I know are atheists. Mostly what keeps people believeing is fear. Not a good motivator for me.
  • chemalurgy
    chemalurgy Posts: 48 Member
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    I grew up in Indiana (still live in the state, but not in the same town) and I went to a Methodist church with my mother and grandmother. I think my siblings went as well when I was very young, but I have no memory of that. I continued going until I was about 12, mainly because we always went out for breakfast and shopping afterward. And I loved my grandma.
    However, I don't think I ever really believed and I never really thought about it much. I knew one Jehova's Witness when I was a kid. Otherwise, no one really talked about religion.
    Once I actually thought about it, I knew I didn't have faith that any of those stories I was taught in Sunday school were true. They were just stories. Just like The Phantom Tolbooth, Wrinkle in Time, The Hobbit, etc.
    It wasn't until I was about 20 years old that anyone ever got snotty with me for being an atheist. Mostly, I try to avoid the subject and unless asked directly, don't tell people that I am an atheist.
    I find it funny, however, that I have been harrassed for being an atheist much more than any religious person I know has ever been harrassed for having their specific beliefs. I was told 1) there was no point to my marriage because I didn't believe in God (2) That I *would* believe in God someday because something bas would happen to me (the example given was that I would have a child who would die - how Christian is that to wish on someone?!) (3) that I'm going to Hell. Everyone has probably gotten the last one. My response is always "How can I go somewhere that doesn't exist?" :) I can be flippant when provoked.

    I just find that 90% of the educated people I know are atheists. Mostly what keeps people believeing is fear. Not a good motivator for me.

    You brought up something that is very interesting to me. It seems that the higher the education a person has the more likely they are to question religion. In my case it's because I'm studying to be a physicist and the more that I learn about science, the more it debunks what I had previously been taught.

    Good for you for sticking up for yourself!
  • chemalurgy
    chemalurgy Posts: 48 Member
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    Hi there. Thanks for the invite. I grew up catholic, everything from Sunday school to my communion and confirmation. I always questioned believing blindly in something just because its what everyone else believed. My very catholic father passed away last year. My relatives say that I'm angry and lashing out but they are wrong. I felt this way before my father ever became ill. But I needed to suck it up and not put fear into a dying mind with my lack of beliefs. His death was sad and sad still because I know there is no heaven and I will never see him again.

    I did the same thing. I never questioned religion out loud until after my parents passed away because they came from a generation where everything including their hopes, dreams and wishes was arranged around religious beliefs. Also, I knew that because the bible says that you aren't to associate with those who choose to leave the Christian faith that they would drop me from their lives.
  • chemalurgy
    chemalurgy Posts: 48 Member
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    I grew up in London & religion doesn't play such a big part in our lives as it seems to in US & especially the bible belt states.

    It is always somewhat of a shock to discover someone you know is religious as it (religion or lack of) just isn't a coversational piece & people do not generally push their beleifs in your face. There are a couple of born agains at work who are a bit preachy but they know better than to go too far (we have laws against that sort of thing) but I figure it is like getting a new car, they want to show off about it somewhat & will calm down once the novelty wears off, hopefully.

    The biggest shock to me recently was discovering that there are creationists in the UK. I thought that was an American thing, so I live & learn. I just hope none of them come in contact with my son as I am all tolerant of faith but not of stupid.!

    I went to a CoE school, grew up with bible stories, hymns & prayer at assembly but my family are not religious so it wasn't a factor at home. I travelled extensively & married a thai buddhist, buddhism isn't really a religion, he lives his faith & doesn't attend temple except for days to give thanks for ancestors or when someone dies, thai buddhist funerals are about as far removed from the Judao/christian process as you can imagine.

    Our 5 year old son goes to a Christian school but is also exposed to Buddhism & no one discusses religion at all at home.

    He is free to chose what, if any, religion he wants to beleive in once he is older but i have to admit I will be a bit dissapointed if he becomes fundemental about it but for me beleiving in a god just wasn't a factor, not something I even questioned, it is just so implausable verging on the ridiculous that I couldn't beleive in any of it even if I really wanted to.

    I wish that the US was like London. I live in the bible belt and religion is shoved down our throats on a daily basis. Here they carry bibles to work, wear religious t-shirts, have bumper stickers, wear crosses, etc. It's everywhere that you go. I wish that we had laws here like you have, but we don't. At my last job I was continually invited to go to church. It became extremely annoying.
  • Gilbrod
    Gilbrod Posts: 1,216 Member
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    Hey there. I appreciate the invite. I am a dad of two crazy boys. I was raised in church. It was forced on me. EIther I go, or get a beating. My mom would even use religion as punishment. I couldn't stand it. I hated anything that stood for anything spiritual in my highschool and college years. I found it idiotic to believe in anything supernatrual. I went through a few things in life, and well, it changed my mind. I believe in God, but I don't force it on people. I don't pressure people at all. In the end, it is just based on personal experiences and faith. I live my life as best as I can. Mistakes are made here and there, but we are human after all. Just don't insult my intelligence. I don't get all my facts from the bible :wink:
  • LeifLeaf
    LeifLeaf Posts: 3 Member
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    Hi, everyone. Thank you for the invite to the group!

    I grew up in a bible belt, Methodist household. We were the normal go to church every Wednesday and Sunday type of family. We never questioned going, but as far back as I can remember I was always skeptical of everything that encompassed 'God'. But I respected my parents enough to not ever really express my skepticism. I always wanted to please them and I thought that going to church and playing the part of a good Christian girl would make them happy.

    I guess it was when I was in high school when what little interest I had in Christianity dwindled. There was never a turning point, never some sort of book I read, never any real outside influence as to why I just stopped caring about it. I had always been very interested in sciences of all types which I think had quite a bit to do with why I eventually stopped bothering in following a faith. I also started to see that my thoughts were completely different than the usual church-goer's. That may have also had a play in it.

    After I got married and moved out, I had been thinking a lot about my lack of faith. It felt almost strange to start thinking that I didn't believe, probably because I was raised to believe something. One day I was walking my dog, still thinking about it and I finally just said 'I'm an atheist'. For some reason it felt so good to say it.

    And that's that! Glad to be in this group with you guys!
  • lalalalyndsey
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    Hey guys! Lyndsey here... not sure where I really stand in this group. I'm not completely athiest or agnostic. I guess you could put me in the category of thiest? I do believe that there is something bigger than us, but I wouldn't necessarily call it "God" or a "higher power" or whatever else you may want to call it.

    Thankfully, my parents never forced me into any religion - my mom was raised Catholic, but never identified herself as Catholic and my dad grew up with a bunch of San Francisco hippies that were more concerned with acid than "God" - I was basically told that whatever I wished to believe in was fine and that was that. Throughout my life I have always questioned religion and never understood how people could put all their belief and life into one specific thing that one person or a group of people decided to preach as truth, or write down in a book and call it religion... just never made sense to me. I've been wanting to research and learn about more religions before I make my final decision, but as of now, this is where I stand. Hope I'm in the right place!
  • chemalurgy
    chemalurgy Posts: 48 Member
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    Hey guys! Lyndsey here... not sure where I really stand in this group. I'm not completely athiest or agnostic. I guess you could put me in the category of thiest? I do believe that there is something bigger than us, but I wouldn't necessarily call it "God" or a "higher power" or whatever else you may want to call it.

    Thankfully, my parents never forced me into any religion - my mom was raised Catholic, but never identified herself as Catholic and my dad grew up with a bunch of San Francisco hippies that were more concerned with acid than "God" - I was basically told that whatever I wished to believe in was fine and that was that. Throughout my life I have always questioned religion and never understood how people could put all their belief and life into one specific thing that one person or a group of people decided to preach as truth, or write down in a book and call it religion... just never made sense to me. I've been wanting to research and learn about more religions before I make my final decision, but as of now, this is where I stand. Hope I'm in the right place!

    Don't worry about where you stand in this group. You are welcome to be here. The only reason that there are restrictions is to keep religious zealots from arguing or prosetylizing. We want a place where non-religious people can be themselves and not feel pressure.

    If you're wanting to research religions, you could also take a class at your local college. I'm enrolled in Comparative Religions next semester. I'm pretty familiar with most religions already, though. I've studied it for many years and have friends from all over the spectrum.

    Glad to have you here. Please feel free to ask any question that you wish and start a topic.
  • karenplauze
    karenplauze Posts: 10 Member
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    Hi, all. I am a 57 y/o heterosexual female. I am somewhere between Atheist and Agnostic. I am not superstitious and do not attribute everything from creation to my personal accomplishments and failings to the interventions of an imaginary sky god. With that in mind, I decided that I could not, "in good faith" so to speak, continue to blame my weight gain on my abusive mother and dysfunctional family. I have always been about 133 (my "military weight"). Over the past 10 years I gained weight and am now 162. It is time that changed. And I am the one who has to do it.
    Anyway, I guess I have always been a nonbeliever, even though I was raised Catholic. During my recent involvement with my dysfunctional family I not only gained weight but, hold onto your hats, tried to turn back to the church for answers to why I was in such a situation. After actually reading the bible and, more importantly, the Catechism of the Catholic Church, a realized what a glut of cognitive dissonance and bent logic Catholic dogma is made up of. I feel I have cognitively returned to sanity. Now its time I physically regained my health as well.
    As you can see from my picture, I have one less item on my "bucket list"!
  • BigDog
    BigDog Posts: 272 Member
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    Hi all,

    My name is Mark and while I'm not in complete hiding, I don't broadcast the fact that I am an Atheist. (I'm pretty sure I would mysteriously lose my job if I did)

    I was born into Baptist church, and attended for the first 12, 13 years of my life. Dad was a deacon in the church, but parted ways with them as he didn't see anything wrong with going out dancing and having a few drinks now and again. (They did) So... We stopped going. My parents got divorced within a few years from that (Don't think, or know if that had anything to do with it) I then just did my own thing for a while and then around 15, 16 I started attending a Pentecostal church because a best friend of mine at the time and a couple of family members were going so I started hanging out there. As my independence grew and my natural dislike of authority and being told what to do and think took over I just couldn't swallow most of the stuff they were trying to feed me. I guess I just gradually grew out of the imaginary world and the fact that most of the parishioners there I found to be two faced and hypocrites.

    Well that's basically it. I work in IT and have a very logical mind and have never really been an emotional person to begin with, so if it doesn't make sense to me I'm going to look into it further and make up my own mind and trying to scare me or work on my emotions simply will not sway me. The truly ironic thing about it though is I'm married to a beautiful and intelligent woman who happens to be Catholic, and get this... I work for an independent IT consulting company but all of our customers are Catholic schools and services. I quietly shake my head and roll my eyes on a daily basis.
  • ChrisC_77
    ChrisC_77 Posts: 271 Member
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    Hello everyone! My name is Chris and I have considered myself an agnostic for about 3 years. I grew up in a Christian family. Nothing hardcore. My parents have some open minded thoughts, but they would not dare share that with their church family. I was a Christian most of my life. Involved in music ministry. I still love to play some Christian music because it is uplifting and Ilike some of the music. But I took a big deep look about 3 years ago into religions, Christianity in particular. After really reading the bible, asking myself some questions and others realizing that their is nothing to validly uphold my Christian beliefs, I began to separate myself from the faith. A long and painful process. Life is a journey and I am here to try and understand it the best I can. Not to walk blindly while I am here. Thanks for allowing me to join this group.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    I'm a woman of a certain age although most people think I look younger. I was baptized in the Catholic Church and raised as a Presbyterian. I occasionally attend High Episcopalian services on Christmas Eve for the music and sense of fellowship.

    When I was 10 my younger brother died in an accident. I found him. It was clear to me that he was not going to live and that if he did he would be a vegetable. Adults kept comforting me with visions of heaven and angels. I couldn't say anything, because kids did not talk back to adults in that era, but I thought: "HEAVEN? You have GOT to be kidding."

    I'm sure I had doubts before then, but that incident confirmed my Atheism, or when I'm hedging, Agnostic Atheism.

    I also like the term "Secular Humanist." I believe that nonbelievers can be FOR something. At the moment, I'm learning a bit about Secular Buddhism, with a focus on Insight Meditation (Vipassana).
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    Hi, all. I am a 57 y/o heterosexual female. I am somewhere between Atheist and Agnostic. I am not superstitious and do not attribute everything from creation to my personal accomplishments and failings to the interventions of an imaginary sky god. With that in mind, I decided that I could not, "in good faith" so to speak, continue to blame my weight gain on my abusive mother and dysfunctional family. I have always been about 133 (my "military weight"). Over the past 10 years I gained weight and am now 162. It is time that changed. And I am the one who has to do it.
    Anyway, I guess I have always been a nonbeliever, even though I was raised Catholic. During my recent involvement with my dysfunctional family I not only gained weight but, hold onto your hats, tried to turn back to the church for answers to why I was in such a situation. After actually reading the bible and, more importantly, the Catechism of the Catholic Church, a realized what a glut of cognitive dissonance and bent logic Catholic dogma is made up of. I feel I have cognitively returned to sanity. Now its time I physically regained my health as well.
    As you can see from my picture, I have one less item on my "bucket list"!

    I think that a dysfunctional family and abusive or neglectful parents can have a lifelong negative effect on one's life, although of course we have to do what we can. Not everyone gets over this stuff.

    I'm not saying that anyone else cares, they're busy with lives of their own, but continuing to suffer the effects of one's childhood long after does not make one a whiner.

    Unlike God, a miserable family is real. :-)
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    I grew up in London & religion doesn't play such a big part in our lives as it seems to in US & especially the bible belt states.

    It is always somewhat of a shock to discover someone you know is religious as it (religion or lack of) just isn't a coversational piece & people do not generally push their beleifs in your face. There are a couple of born agains at work who are a bit preachy but they know better than to go too far (we have laws against that sort of thing) but I figure it is like getting a new car, they want to show off about it somewhat & will calm down once the novelty wears off, hopefully.

    The biggest shock to me recently was discovering that there are creationists in the UK. I thought that was an American thing, so I live & learn. I just hope none of them come in contact with my son as I am all tolerant of faith but not of stupid.!

    I went to a CoE school, grew up with bible stories, hymns & prayer at assembly but my family are not religious so it wasn't a factor at home. I travelled extensively & married a thai buddhist, buddhism isn't really a religion, he lives his faith & doesn't attend temple except for days to give thanks for ancestors or when someone dies, thai buddhist funerals are about as far removed from the Judao/christian process as you can imagine.

    Our 5 year old son goes to a Christian school but is also exposed to Buddhism & no one discusses religion at all at home.

    He is free to chose what, if any, religion he wants to beleive in once he is older but i have to admit I will be a bit dissapointed if he becomes fundemental about it but for me beleiving in a god just wasn't a factor, not something I even questioned, it is just so implausable verging on the ridiculous that I couldn't beleive in any of it even if I really wanted to.


    It's much worse in the South, but even the Northeastern U. S. has people who wear their religion on their sleeve and want you to wear it too. They even do it where it's completely inappropriate, like the workplace. Unbelievable.
  • StheK
    StheK Posts: 443 Member
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    Hi everyone,

    I'm a 39 year-old software project manager, and I'm a single (never married) mom of a 20 year old son. I was raised without any religion. I actually recently found out that my dad has been stealing Gideon's bibles from hotel rooms and throwing them away for longer than I've been alive! Anyway, I dabbled in various religions over the years, because it seemed like it would be nice to sort of fit in, but one day I realized that I had essentially defined a god that I felt I could live with, and that was just ridiculous. How could I believe in a "higher power" that I had invented? I started applying my usually pretty sharp critical thinking skills to the issue and discovered that not only did I not really believe, but I couldn't even think of a good reason to WANT to believe. So I cut loose of even the "spiritual but not religious" designation and embraced the fact that I was an atheist. And my tolerance for religion has pretty much disappeared all together. I'm lucky in that I've never lived anywhere where it mattered whether or not I was religious, and I've never experienced negative consequences as a result of my atheism. It even turns out that both my boss and the owner of the company I work for are also atheists. I think there are a lot more of us around than people think, and I am always glad to stand up and be counted so that others might feel more comfortable doing the same thing.

    I'm here on MFP to help me manage my PCOS and to try to mitigate my sedentary lifestyle. It's nice to meet you all!
  • padipaddy
    padipaddy Posts: 12
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    Hi there, I'm Robert from Northern Ireland where for years and years being the 'wrong religion' could and did end in the deaths of thousands. I detest all religion. I think it's dangerous and stopped my children from attending church and school lessons on religion, it's a fantasy and a waste of time.

    I'm a commercial diver and diving instructor for my sins lol

    Glad to be here

    Rab