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staying Single!
Aross83
Posts: 936 Member
So i am just cuious to know if i am the only one who has no real desire to get married?
maybe i havent found the correct person. I thought i had but we broke up a few years back.. now my whole outlook on it has changed. I am currently back with this person for about 6 months now and i just dont care about it.. why am i back with this person? thats a good question... one i quess i should figure out soon..
maybe i havent found the correct person. I thought i had but we broke up a few years back.. now my whole outlook on it has changed. I am currently back with this person for about 6 months now and i just dont care about it.. why am i back with this person? thats a good question... one i quess i should figure out soon..
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The only reason I would get married is if my partner really wanted to. I don't care one way or another. To me it's more about making the emotional commitment.0
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I never want to get married. Never have, never will. I feel that 2 people can be committed to each other and love each other unconditionally without getting taxes and the church involved. Divorce is too easy, so it's not a sure thing anyway. I'm not saying marriage isn't right for anyone, I'm saying it's not right for me. Now, I also have no desire to raise a child, my views would be different if a child was involved.0
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I would like to get married, but agree with with Kitsune that the emotional commitment is the most important factor in a relationship. I do think it's normal to question the idea of marriage the older we get though simply because we've had heartbreaks and see divorce around us, sometimes the cynical side sinks in about the whole thing.0
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I never want to get married again. But .. the first time around .. that is all I lived for, was to get married. Which is probably why I didn't stop and think about what I was actually marrying.
Divorce was AWFUL. That is something I never want to go through again. EVER. It was the worst feeling ever.0 -
Divorce is too easy, so it's not a sure thing anyway. ....
Anyone who says divorce is easy has never lived that hell.
I kind of understand what you meant, but if you're married I do believe divorce is a deterrence. If you're just living with someone you can basically just pack up and go. Not the case in a marriage.
I do want to be married again. It's great...0 -
Anyone who says divorce is easy has never lived that hell.
Word.0 -
I guess what I meant was when I said "Divorce is too easy" is that people seem to get them more often these days. I know it's not easy - I've had several friends go through it, which is another reason I'm not horribly wild about the idea.0
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If you're just living with someone you can basically just pack up and go. Not the case in a marriage.
I lived with someone for a long time even though we never married, I can say that it has it's ups and downs too. Yes, logistics may be 'somewhat' easier, but the emotions were the same... and truthfully, I found that a lot of friends, etc. didn't respect how painful the process was for me because they brushed it off with a "...well you never got married" attitude.0 -
I do not currently want to get married, but would be thrilled to meet someone I would marry in a heartbeat. I can safely say I have never been with anyone that I have had the depth of passion, love and unending hunger for required for me to get married.0
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yeah i guess i would if i found the rite person.0
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I have heard all about it from my friends (men and women), that marriage and kids is just what you do. Well, for me, maybe not. I don't think marriage is necessary for 2 people to love and live and be committed to one another. Honestly in my mind, it is more about sharing my health insurance coverage with the other (especially if they didn't have any). Or if everything else was right and they just always had that dream of being married, I could probably be swayed.
And then the kids, I have found I will probably end up with a single mom just b/c I don't want to pass my F**ked up genes on to anyone else. But I love kids, so a single mom might work out.0 -
I have no desire to get married again....I do miss companionship and conversation, but have no desire to get married. It was interesting to hear Grum's point of shared health coverage and things of that nature.
Other than that, nope.0 -
I've never had any desire to get married, and now I have way too much to lose financially by doing so. I don't like the idea of having to involve lawyers if I want to end things. So, no way. I would live with someone, though.0
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I really have no interest in getting married again. Have been married and having done a LT live in relationship it was much easier to untangle myself from the live in. Not that the emational issues werent there but everything else was easier. That being said however if it were really important to my partner that we get married then I think I would. All I know is I'm not paying for one of those crazies expensive ceremonies. Someone else better cough up the money or were hitting the courthouse and having a BBQ afterwards lol0
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Someone else better cough up the money or were hitting the courthouse and having a BBQ afterwards lol
One of my friends did this. They got married at the courthouse, then had a big bonfire and BBQ reception. Was so much better and much more fun than any other wedding I have been to.0 -
Someone else better cough up the money or were hitting the courthouse and having a BBQ afterwards lol
One of my friends did this. They got married at the courthouse, then had a big bonfire and BBQ reception. Was so much better and much more fun than any other wedding I have been to.
I had a couple of friends of mine get married at a bar that they met at. It was interesting. Some of the older generation present looked very unhappy. But we got to sing Kareoke at their wedding lol0 -
I kinda feel that if you are in a live in, committed relationship and it ends (after years of being together) it's just as hard emotionally to get out of it as a marriage would be, but you'd be more financially secure. I kinda thing any more marriage is a financial transaction. It's the ability for a tax deduction, sharing health insurance and sharing debt. I'd rather keep my debt and money to myself. Which is why I'm choosing to live with my current beau as of January and only share rent and utilities. Everything else is dutch. I've been single too long to feel the need to share finances with anyone.0
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I've never had the desire to get married either. But I suppose I might have to marry Nat if I want to bring him to America. Teeheehee. :ohwell:0
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I've never had the desire to get married either. But I suppose I might have to marry Nat if I want to bring him to America. Teeheehee. :ohwell:
:flowerforyou:
You could always stay here
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Anyone who says divorce is easy has never lived that hell.
Word.
WORD!!!!!0 -
I am warming up to the idea - one day I would like to get married (small wedding this time) again. My boyfriend keeps telling me marriage are in our future. I am divorced so it really isn't a huge thing right now.0
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I really have no interest in getting married again. Have been married and having done a LT live in relationship it was much easier to untangle myself from the live in. Not that the emational issues werent there but everything else was easier. That being said however if it were really important to my partner that we get married then I think I would. All I know is I'm not paying for one of those crazies expensive ceremonies. Someone else better cough up the money or were hitting the courthouse and having a BBQ afterwards lol
^^^ THIS
My dicorce has left me VERY cynical about the institution of marriage I'm afraid. So many lies were told that day. When she decided she wanted out all of her vows before God and man were not worth the paper they were written on. I guess I'm a little bitter. <<< you think?!
So... I'd prefer to stay unmarried and be 'in the moment' with my partner rather than make promises about 'forever' that I doubt most people take seriously. Who knows? Let me fall in love again and we'll see
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Anyone who says divorce is easy has never lived that hell.
Word.
WORD!!!!!
DUDE! I just looked at your pics and you are a STEELERS FAN!!!!!! Woot woot! Me too! Since birth baby!!!0 -
When she decided she wanted out all of her vows before god and man were not worth the paper they were written on.
This was the worst part for me .. I took those vows very seriously and for him to just walk away from them really hurt.0 -
Two PJ quotes.I would like to get married, but agree with with Kitsune that the emotional commitment is the most important factor in a relationship.
That is most important to me as well. There are some things that the piece of paper makes easier from a logistical standpoint.I lived with someone for a long time even though we never married, I can say that it has it's ups and downs too. Yes, logistics may be 'somewhat' easier, but the emotions were the same... and truthfully, I found that a lot of friends, etc. didn't respect how painful the process was for me because they brushed it off with a "...well you never got married" attitude.
That's unfair. You got a raw deal there in terms of emotional support in your social circle. A breakup after a long relationship is not fun any way you slice it.
A break up, marriage or not, is better when there are no kids involved.
There's a certain emptiness when it is all over.0 -
Two PJ quotes.I would like to get married, but agree with with Kitsune that the emotional commitment is the most important factor in a relationship.
That is most important to me as well. There are some things that the piece of paper makes easier from a logistical standpoint.I lived with someone for a long time even though we never married, I can say that it has it's ups and downs too. Yes, logistics may be 'somewhat' easier, but the emotions were the same... and truthfully, I found that a lot of friends, etc. didn't respect how painful the process was for me because they brushed it off with a "...well you never got married" attitude.
That's unfair. You got a raw deal there in terms of emotional support in your social circle. A breakup after a long relationship is not fun any way you slice it.
A break up, marriage or not, is better when there are no kids involved.
There's a certain emptiness when it is all over.
DM, Thanks for being kind. :flowerforyou: I didn't mean to imply that my friends didn't support me at all... but it was clearly less than if it had been a divorce.0 -
I would definitely be open to getting married b/c I've never experienced it before. Would think at this stage of life (little older, better sense of self, kid grown), that it could be a really great thing. Plus I hate to think of myself dying a spinster.
But with that said, when I think of the logistics of combining finances, property, etc., etc., maybe living in sin would be the simpler choice.
hmm...0 -
I have no desire to get married anytime in my 20's or early 30's. so that puts me at least 10 years out lol I don't even want a long term relationship right now. I have a few job offers that will require me to move halfway across the country or all the way across sometime in the next few years, so if a girl is looking for a potential long term thing it wouldn't be fair to them. Plus, I'm having too much fun!So i am just cuious to know if i am the only one who has no real desire to get married?
maybe i havent found the correct person. I thought i had but we broke up a few years back.. now my whole outlook on it has changed. I am currently back with this person for about 6 months now and i just dont care about it.. why am i back with this person? thats a good question... one i quess i should figure out soon..
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Anyone who says divorce is easy has never lived that hell.
Word.
WORD!!!!!
DUDE! I just looked at your pics and you are a STEELERS FAN!!!!!! Woot woot! Me too! Since birth baby!!!
So am I. They are making it hard to love them this season though. Sunday's game put me back in good spirits though...0 -
But with that said, when I think of the logistics of combining finances, property, etc., etc., maybe living in sin would be the simpler choice.
A good point. It seems to me that as people get older, it is harder to merge with logistics. Does anyone care to take this point further?
Keeping the logistics as simple as possible during singlehood has been a primary focus point for me.0
This discussion has been closed.