For me it is a mix of things.

* Too Independent - never had a long term relationship over like 6 months, moved away from family and have just grown up doing everything for myself. While I love having a woman around, it can be hard sometimes finding time to integrate them into my life. Happened once, but then she left.

* Body Image/Self Esteem issues - I have never liked who I was (weight wise), and thus never had a very high self esteem. This in turn doesn't give me the confidence that I think I need to approach women. (Always in my mind asking why the hell would they choose me anyways over someone else? There are better options than me out there.) So that is probably a huge one for me, which is why I have found a bit of success on online dating where it can all just be out there.

* Love language - I am very physical and when I show my affection is through touch (my primary love language). Words of affirmation (my lowest love language) are hard for me b/c I find that words are cheap, and can easily have no meaning behind them. Been told by my ex's that they always wondered if I cared, as I never told them I did. I misinterpreted my hand holding, massages, dedicated time together, etc as expressing these feelings for them.

So yeah, those are my heavy hitters that I believe keep me single, or at least keep throwing me back into that singles pool.

Honestly? It's just too soon.

I've been married twice. The first time for 10 years, the second time for 9. I just go separated a year and a half ago, and the divorce has been final just a little over a year.

This last one was really painful and hard for me. The marriage was so difficult and took so much out of me that my taste for being with someone, in ANY sort of a relationship, has been spoiled (hopefully temporarily).

I didn't want to be that guy that had been divorced twice before they were 45, so I gave everything I had into making that relationship work, and more. More than I should have. I probably should have ended it only a couple of years into it but I refused to give up. When I finally did give up I realized just how disgusted and frustrated I was with the whole thing.

So... right now is literally the first time as an adult I'm taking major time for me, figuring my stuff out, focusing on being set up and successful and happy on my own. I still see people once in a while but I also know that I'm ridiculously emotionally unavailable at the moment, and probably will be for at least another few years.

Long story short...

I'm single by choice, because I wouldn't do myself (or anyone else) any favors by entering into any sort of relationship right now.

^^^^ THIS.

I could have written this except my marriage was 16 years and my 2nd relationship (we never got married) was 7 years.

Both women I loved completely. First one cheated on me. Second one was pathologically selfish, self centered and unable to consider MY feelings in ANYTHING. It just took me a loooong time to see it because I so wanted it to work.

Why am I single??? Ha!!!

My life is going through a lot of changes right now, and for what ever reason I haven't met any women in my area that I'm interested in.

I've been a big guy my entire life so I've always had the mentality that I'm not good enough for certain women. And then typically when I would try and get close to anybody I found myself(likely put myself) in the friend zone.

Since I've been losing weight I'll admit I have a lot more confidence and find myself actually messaging people on dating sites and getting to know them. I've also been driving myself to get out of the house more and have a good time, not only does it make the day go by quick but I always end up enjoying myself (even if I don't think I will at first).

Silly as it sounds, I'm still growing up (finishing up school, advancing my career, and looking to buy a house) It'll all come with time

Hugs and beer all around!!

hmmmm... I think I'm single because I'm not trying that hard to find a relationship and i'm doing the online dating which requires a lot of work. When I go out, it's usually at loud places and usually not the place for meeting people I would want to date.

J