ever feel really low bc of binging?

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I just binged today. I feel so, so awful... I honestly wish I could die.... :frown:

My pants feel tighter.... and I just am so ashamed of myself yet I know I deserve this, because I put in the food in my mouth. Nobody made me. I did it all.

Sigh... sorry, I just had to rant.

Replies

  • ObtainingBalance
    ObtainingBalance Posts: 1,446 Member
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    Oh you do not deserve it hun. It's a struggle, i know. It can be tough. I think a lot of us feel down because of binges, I haven't talked to anyone here who doesn't . Just know you're not alone!!!

    Stay strong. <3
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    Agree with iceyrain, you are not alone, I experience the same feelings after binge eating, and it makes me wonder, why does it happen again, when it feels so terrible at the time.
    It is crazy really.
  • eschorre
    eschorre Posts: 185 Member
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    Yes, I agree with both responses. EVERY-SINGLE-TIME I binge. I have binged all weekend, today was a good day and I feel a bit better but go right back to that low feeling when I binge. Hang in there. Tomorrow is a new day. We are all here for each other!
  • Punkedpoetess
    Punkedpoetess Posts: 633 Member
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    I agree with all of these responses. My binges make me feel guilty, wierd, out of control, and make me hate myself for letting that happen afterwards. Hang in there, everyday is a new day.
  • berumotto
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    I just binged today. And I am absolutely in the pits.

    I know I don't deserve this disorder, but I know I deserve to feel awful about eating as I did today. I showed almost no restraint at all. One step out of line, and I was basically like "screw it". Boom-- binge day.

    I feel terrible, I know I will gain weight from this. I am wrecking my own body, causing health problems, but I CANNOT STOP. I just can't. I would seek therapy, but I can't-- I have such a heavy courseload, and the judgement that my friends would pass onto me is unbearable. I wish I could just curl up and disappear. :brokenheart:
  • eschorre
    eschorre Posts: 185 Member
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    So sorry :( I think we all feel like this, it is so hard. I have just spent Christmas with my SIL and was SO embarrassed b/c I feel like I have gotten so fat since the last time she saw me (and she is very thin), I have==I gained 15 pounds and you can tell. I feel everyone is judging me but I know they are not and that I am the one making a bigger deal about my size because I feel so gross. I am really trying to be kinder to myself and know that I am more than numbers on a scale, but when no pants fit in your closet it make it very hard to talk kind to yourself. I have been wearing the same jeans for the last 2 weeks b/c they are the only ones that fit. I know I will get beyond this and I will treat myself with the respect I deserve. It is so hard, but hang in there. We are all here for you and we can all definitely relate to your struggles and feelings!
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    I just binged today. And I am absolutely in the pits.

    I know I don't deserve this disorder, but I know I deserve to feel awful about eating as I did today. I showed almost no restraint at all. One step out of line, and I was basically like "screw it". Boom-- binge day.

    I feel terrible, I know I will gain weight from this. I am wrecking my own body, causing health problems, but I CANNOT STOP. I just can't. I would seek therapy, but I can't-- I have such a heavy courseload, and the judgement that my friends would pass onto me is unbearable. I wish I could just curl up and disappear. :brokenheart:

    My bf always says to me, your body is beautiful,and yet you are punishing it and it does not like to be punished. He also told me that it will rebel if you try to fight nature by striving to be a weight that is unnatural for you, or by treating yourself badly.

    My suggestion is, don't allow the binge to ruin the rest of the day, try and snap back from it, focus on something else, mentally draw a line and forgive yourself, not that anyone should have to be forgiven for overeating anyway. You did not commit a crime, murder someone or somesuch terrible thing. You ate too much. You will deal with the binging when you deal with whatever is underlying it, and you can do that yourself, without needing therapy. There is a lot of material online for a start, and you can also try meditating daily, and using that time to focus on your self awareness. Quit all thoughts of restriction and dieting and losing weight until you can get a grip on the binge eating, as I always find for me that planning on restricting or dieting, panicking about the weight gain, tends to make me binge more.

    Maybe make a list of things to do if you feel a binge coming on.
    Last night, I was so close to ordering in ben and jerry's ice cream by the pint at 4.30 in the morning, as I used to do when I felt overtired and had already overeaten. But I did not. I made myself read things online, and had some apples until it got to 5am at which point the pizza place closed for the night. Work on remaining aware, and mentally battling yourself when you want to binge.
    Work on finding some other things you really enjoy doing, as an alternative, whether that be gaming, reading in bed, having a long bath or some sort of craft project, like cross stitch or card making. Write down the reasons that binge eating is a negative thing to do, and tactics for avoiding it. For me, I find it totally ruins the enjoyment of food, it wastes money, and the fact that doing it results in feeling horrible physically and emotionally, is proof that I need to work on loving myself enough to not want that for myself.
  • MSWDiet
    MSWDiet Posts: 399 Member
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    OH HELL YEA I FEEL LOWEST OF THE LOW AFTER A BINGE. I MAY KEEP A BINGE GOING JUST TO HOLD OFF ON THE RESULTING SELF LOATHING. THE BINGE HAS NO UPSIDE FOR ME BE IT A HIGH CAL OR A LOW CAL BINGE. I FEEL YOUR PAIN.
  • bjcj96
    bjcj96 Posts: 3
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    In addition to the emotions we feel after binging, maybe part of it is also from the kinds of food we just ate. Tons of sugary stuff makes your blood glucose go way up and then you crash.....I think it's can be partly a physical reaction in addition to mental.
  • greekygirl
    greekygirl Posts: 448 Member
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    ^^^ I agree with this. I think that's why I get major cravings by day 2 or 3....I'm withdrawing from sugar, just like a coke addict. So even though I feel terrible about myself after a binge, and especially the morning after, I go back to it.

    The morning after a binge I am almost suicidal, that's how low I get. Totally feel your pain.
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    In addition to the emotions we feel after binging, maybe part of it is also from the kinds of food we just ate. Tons of sugary stuff makes your blood glucose go way up and then you crash.....I think it's can be partly a physical reaction in addition to mental.

    Because I tend to go for high fat, high sugar foods like cake, muffins and chocolate when I have a binge day, I find my moods become very unstable, and I suffer attacks of anger. I am sensitive anyway to stimuli and stress, so I am guessing the sugar really has a severe impact on some element of my brain chemistry. I don't just get depressed, I get enraged.
  • ObtainingBalance
    ObtainingBalance Posts: 1,446 Member
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    In addition to the emotions we feel after binging, maybe part of it is also from the kinds of food we just ate. Tons of sugary stuff makes your blood glucose go way up and then you crash.....I think it's can be partly a physical reaction in addition to mental.

    Because I tend to go for high fat, high sugar foods like cake, muffins and chocolate when I have a binge day, I find my moods become very unstable, and I suffer attacks of anger. I am sensitive anyway to stimuli and stress, so I am guessing the sugar really has a severe impact on some element of my brain chemistry. I don't just get depressed, I get enraged.


    I find I'm more moody + depressed... I feel horrible and act rudely to everyone around me. I just feel like isolating.. it's not the best of days.
  • berumotto
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    Well-- Just binged again. Fml.

    I'm so sick and tired of binging, yet I do it again and again. It's like I DONT LEARN FROM IT. What is wrong with me????
  • rincoglionita
    rincoglionita Posts: 177 Member
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    The shame is the worst, and the most counterproductive, effect of bingeing, IMO. Do you have someone you can reach out to when you feel the compulsion to binge? Can you post here? Seems everyone here can relate, certainly won't judge, and can offer some suggestions for alternatives.
    So sorry you were hurting.