What drives me CRAZYYY...can anyone relate??

Hi Everyone!

So this is something that has been continuously coming up for me, and in fact can be very demotivating. For a little background: I've never been considered "obese" or particularly "heavy" (hence why I joined this group!) but I've always had extra that I want to get rid of. My heaviest weight ever was probably 157 and my lowest 135 (in high school) and my goal is to get back there - I'm currently at 150. I'm 21 years old so no ladies this is not postmenopausal or postpartum weight gain!

Anyway, to get to my point. The hardest thing for me in the world when it comes to losing weight and living a healthy lifestyle is people around me. I know everyone says you shouldn't be influenced or care about what other people are doing, but the truth is we live in a social society and that can be difficult! I am in a nursing program with 15+ girls, all of them with literally no extra fat on their bodies, trim, lean, tight, pretty much my goal. But the hard part is they eat what EVER they want. And I mean anything and everything. Double-double cheeseburgers, milkshakes, cookies, candy, cream, doughnuts, burritos, literally whatever you can think of, ALL the time. They don't workout and NEVER gain a pound! Me, on the other hand....I gain weight FAR too easily. I eat better than anyone I know, but I still have to be extremely careful and diligent while trying to lose weight and get in shape. I have to eat extremely well and workout like a maniac to lose weight, and even then I still gain it back unless I'm constantly diligent. Furthermore, since they don't gain any weight from eating, they all try to make me get on their bandwagon and eat whatever they're eating, and give me *kitten* if I don't!

For the record, I am not saying that I WANT to eat all of the stuff they're eating. I have been very involved with nutrition from a young age, and I know many may say "Well they will pay the price later with their health, even if it doesn't show up in their weight now!"
And I understand that. It's just a little thing everyday that gets under my skin. Basically the question is...

WHY do I have to work SO FLIPPIN' HARD and other people are just BORN THAT WAY (and no not quoting Lady Gaga).

Thank you for listening to me vent. Love you guys!


  • I can SO relate!! One thing I read, though, made me think. Those people who you see eating anything they want probably don't do that when they are at home during the week. When you're not around, they are most likely exercising or eating healthy, and when they are at a party or a social event, that's their "cheat day."
  • SarahJane139
    SarahJane139 Posts: 20 Member
    Girl I can totally relate! I have a lot of friends like that too. Eating with them during undergrad earned me 8 extra pounds.

    From what I've seen it comes down to your "eating personality". Personally, I like to eat three meals (and usually a snack) everyday. If I go completely overboard at one meal I'm still going to eat those other two normally sized meals. My friends who are small and "can eat anything" aren't like that. If they have a big (unhealthy) meal they aren't hungry anymore and aren't going to eat much the rest of the day. My mom is slender and can take down a dinner plate like you wouldn't believe. But she usually only eats twice a day, a small lunch and a big dinner, without snacking.
  • RunnerInVT
    RunnerInVT Posts: 226 Member
    Its also kinda like the student who gets all A's without cracking a book and the one who has to work real hard.
  • avir8
    avir8 Posts: 671 Member
    It will catch up with them eventually, women just can't eat like that for life no matter what genetics dictate. Anywho, why not go for something healthy, most of the time and then treat yourself, once a week. It's hard with school and "barbies" but you have to find a way to eat healthier but still be able to do happy hour once in a while.
  • I'm so glad you guys can all understand where I'm coming from! I agree with all of your comments. For my own preferences, I do allow indulgences once in awhile when I'm working hard at a healthy lifestyle...tonight I made a healthy (but delicious!) pumpkin coconut pudding :smile: I think the most important thing, as you all have mentioned in some way, is balance. It can just be difficult when your toned friend is downing two grilled cheese's and you're sitting their with your homemade soup haha.

    BUT I will say, I always feel so much more awake, alert, and energetic when I eat well! Someday I'll catch up with them (figure-wise :wink:) but hopefully I'll be treating my body much nicer than they have been lately haha. I still love those girls though!

    Thanks for all of your replies :flowerforyou:
  • What Sarah Jane said is exactly right! I used to be one of the skinny eat anything girls during my undergrad, but my eating patterns were crazy because I was always busy doing stuff, but in average I was probably only consuming 1000Cals per day, either as a single blow out with pizza and beer, or by grazing during the day. But ten years on I am suffering for it now! I'm far less healthy than larger friends because I never had to develop an exercise habit, I have put weight on and at this age (31) it is much harder to lose that weight if your body hasn't got used being healthy over the years. So, when you are my age and things start to sag and go lumpy in even the slimmest women- you will be far better placed to deal with it and will continue to look amazing while your "skinny" Uni friends will start to look like they let themselves go.

    Have fun being healthy for life! And you look amazing in your photo- great toned arms!
  • @lisalocum - thank you! And yes, I will do my best to have fun and be healthy for life :)
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
    those girls will be the ones who get married and gain 150 lbs because they have no clue how to eat properly.

    I try to not even look at girls like that. It's too sad. I've NEVER been fit. Fat kid fo' lyfe!! haha!

    I have to try hard, but I'm also awesome. :P
  • TKRV
    TKRV Posts: 167 Member
    Friends and college did the same thing to me and my coworkers do it now. They act as if only people who are massivly overweight need to think about eating healthy. I try and tell them, I want to establsih good eating habits while I'm young. I want to maintain a healthy weight as a grow older and my motabolism changes. It's wondering that this group is a place where we can support each other in eating healthy. I sure haven't come across a whole lot of support out there. It's like they think the only people who eat healthy are celebrities and people with eating disorders.

    I'm sure your friends don't have any malicious intentions. My suggestion would be to just not talk about health or eating healthy with them. When they ask what you want at a resturnat, tell them. If they try to pursuade you to get something else, be insistant, but don't say the word "healthy." I've done this around some of the friends in my life and it seems to work.
  • Christinerandle
    Christinerandle Posts: 4 Member
    You are definitely not alone. Honestly I used to be one of those girls who could eat whatever and wouldn't gain. But as they get older the weight will start to build up ... like one of the comments said they will be the ones who get married and pack on the pounds. I am not and never have been fat but after I turned 35 yrs old the weight has been more difficult to keep off. Have you had your thyroid tested. If it isn't working properly that could be why you are struggling to take the weight off and have to be so careful. My sister has struggled her entire life as you have had to do. Eventually the doctor checked her thyroid and found her thyroid wasn't functioning the way it should. She will always struggle as a result. Just a thought and something you may want to look into if you haven't. Hang in those girls will feel your pain later in life.

  • Corkline
    Corkline Posts: 107
    I'm sorry. I too was that girl a decade ago...and I'm paying for it now. I'm 5'3", 144 lbs, and it does NOT look good on me. I have healthy eating habits, I just need to do them.

    What bugs me is everyone who tells me "you look great, why are you dieting?". Ay one have experience with that?
  • jellybird
    jellybird Posts: 37 Member
    I'm assuming your peers are all in their 20s and early 30s. It will catch up with them if they don't learn to eat right and take care of themselves. I have always been super active and could always eat anything in my 20s and 30s.

    Now, at 44, I work full time and have a young child. I have to consciously track my calories and fund the time to work out because being active all the time no longer fits into my schedule. I watch so many people get older and busier - they get rounder and softer, and eventually get unhealthy in their 50s and beyond.

    While you don't have the same metabolism as your peers, you have a huge advantage. Continue to workout and eat clean. Your body will respond and you'll get younger as you age, not older. That's what is happening to me. Around 40, I started to gain weight, get flabby, have low energy, feel tired all the time, have neck pain, etc. Last March, I start doing lots of HIIT training. I'm getting fitter and younger! Less flab, less weight, less pain!
  • glittersupernova
    glittersupernova Posts: 90 Member
    I can respond to this from both sides now, lol. I was once one of those girls who could eat anything and stay pretty trim. But now--I speak from the position of a late 20s, pre-medical student who struggles to shed the extra flab all along my body even when eating just right. It is a dramatic change and experience.

    I know that frustration. I am in a post-baccalaureate pre-medical program and am older than most of the students on campus (I am 26, and most are 18-21). There are a lot of young women there, that eat and drink a lot, meanwhile maintaining their seemingly perfect, lean and fit bodies.

    Ultimately, I recognize that I am getting older, and I can't depend on my teenage metabolism anymore. It eventually stops for everyone..or most people. You know? These fellow nursing students that you're talking about--well, one day they will face that change in metabolism, much like we did! There comes a time for everyone where they have to make a dietary change for some aspect of their health.

    Keep this in mind too; you are a nursing student. What kind of health (eating, diet, etc.) habits do you wish to instill in your patients? Patients look to health professionals as a role model; you, maintaining a healthy diet and regular exercise, will act as a positive role model for patients! Meanwhile, what kind of example are these other students setting for the patients? Health professionals are trying to encourage patients to be healthier, how can they ask if this if they, themselves, cannot or will not do it? Be proud of your healthier habits, despite the frustration that accompanies all of the hard work you put into staying/being healthy.

    It is easier said than done to be enthusiastic about a situation like this. I often think about other students on campus who so easily maintain their fit bodies while I have to watch every calorie that goes into each meal now. But I know, that when I apply to medical school this year, I want to go into my interviews looking and feeling my best! I want to provide a positive representation of what medicine should be all about--taking care of your body, mind, and soul!

    Also remember, your healthy eating and exercise will be beneficial in the long-run. You are what you eat! You will probably live a healthier, longer life, with less prescription medications at age 70/80+. My grandmother is a shining example of this. I mean, we don't have perfect genetics in the family by any means...but, she has generally been very good about her diet and exercise and is turning 90 next year, but does weight lifting, belly dancing, tai chi, etc. You name it! She still has all of her own teeth too! I mean, she does not have any prescription medication unless there is an immediate but temporary health problem. So--keep these things in mind when making all the effort that you do. It will pay off to take care of yourself early on! Just keep at it, stay strong, and try to perhaps encourage those other young women to do the same for themselves :).