My husband and I hold hands but having grown up in Indiana, living in Chicago and then moving to South Carolina I've seen it done many different ways at different parishes. We hold hands with family, one time somebody reached out and held my hand here at a parish in SC. One time in Chicago when my parents were visiting my mom put her hand out to the fellow next to her and at first I don't think he knew what to think at first then he just grabbed her hand and prayed.

I don't have any problem with either way I just don't want people to feel awkward - that they have to grab your hand or be intimidated if they don't want to. When we go back home (Indiana) it's such a small community and everybody knows everybody so they all seem to hold hands even from one pew to the next which I think is kinda neat considering there seems to be such a lack of community and fellowship or at least to me it seems that way from when I grew up.

It is not supposed to be done during Mass.