I didn't post last week, and I should have! Not because it is something I need "to do", but because I have just been so blessed just now reading all your comments (when I did finally get to it!) and I want to bless and encourage you too. You are all such a blessing to me. And I loved so many things you shared (especially those lists!!)

I too felt a bit like Donna in this Don't Give Up Week! I read the chapter just before going away (for a trip to the capital - THANK YOU all for praying for that by the way! It went SO WELL - more below!) I was seriously considering giving up - on this bible study, and the battle I seemed to be losing in trying to bring my thoughts captive. They still seem to want to run all over the place all the time like little kids when they know bedtime is approaching! (Does anyone else have a 7 year old that always does that?!)

Anyway, I read the chapter, decided (like Donna!) that I couldn't give up in a Don't Give Up week (but maybe I could drop out gracefully in a Little by Little one next week! There go those thoughts again!!!) Then I went to Bamako. One of the main reasons for going was for a Women's Missionary Retreat. I attend this each year. Normally we are around 120 women. Because of the current crisis here in Mali, there are less of us around as many organisations have evacuated their staff, but it was still a privilege to meet with 61 wonderful women for 3 days. And the theme of our retreat? A Faith That Overcomes! Had to smile at that one! I was in a state of general fatigue (spiritually and emotionally) and God had told me before going down Don't Give Up and now He was saying OVERCOME! I needed to start listening. The theme was based on a study of the book of Habakkuk. That book doesn't start well. Habakkuk is crying out to God to intervene. He is really wrestling with God (I was quite comforted to be reminded that that is totally OK in God's book!) The first response of God to those initial cries was really not great news for Habakkuk - He would use the evil Babylonian army who would come down from the north to invade! (Not exactly what a room full of western missionaries in Mali really wanted to hear either, given the Islamic extremists occupying the north of our country and threatening to descend further!!! The weekend DID improve after that!!!) However, throughout the rest of the teaching by the wonderful woman who taught us, the Holy Spirit really worked on my heart. As he did with Habakkuk, he calmed my anxious heart. He taught me that my ways are not His ways, and that although His ways may seem crazy to me, they are ultimately for my good! He showed me that HE needs to be the object of my faith, not the circumstances around me. He told me to WAIT ON HIM. And now, I don't want to give up! I DO want to overcome. With God's help, and in HIS way, I can win this battle over negative thoughts and worries. And even if I struggle a lot in the meantime and things get tough, "YET I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Saviour" (Hab.3:18) (I would seriously recommend a read through of Habakkuk if you haven't looked at it for a while. It's only 3 chapters!)

GOD IS GOOD! You sisters in the Lord are fabulous! If I was so blessed it was because you were praying! (There is so much more I could tell you about that trip too - protection on an extremely bad, dangerous road; fabulous meetings with our Christian Lawyers Group; new relationships made and old ones renewed; and my husband and kids all had a fun time here too!) I WILL NOT QUIT THIS STUDY (or I would lose your fellowship!) - but more importantly, I WILL NOT GIVE UP this fight to win the battle in my mind!

Thank you SO MUCH for your love and prayers.

Ali