I am the same way....I love my son to death but I need to work. It is part of my identity kind of. I worked hard to get my Master's Degree and I love my job helping other people. I do miss him on long days but I think it really makes me appreciate the time we do have together more. Plus, he mostly is watched by my parents, so I know he is always with people that love him as much as I do. It is ok to feel that way, being a stay at home mom is not for everyone, it doesn't mean you love your son any less. Good luck, it's not easy to go back. I found the first days were easier because it was nice for the break, but it almost got harder because I missed him more. I think part-time work would be perfect I went back when my son was 10 weeks.

Your are not alone- I am not a SAHM either. I was lucky enough to hold off going back to work until my LO was 4 months but by that time I was ready for some adult interaction. I always thought that I could be a SAHM if finances allowed but actually being at home for that long made me realize that it's not for me and I felt super guilty for feeling that way. I have family to watch my LO so I know he is getting the best care and being loved so it helped with the guilt...a little bit. I still see SAHMs and think to myself "how can they do it but I can't" but I know that I'll be a better/happier mom if I worked. The 'mom guilt' is neverending!

I would love to be a SAHM but financially we just can't do it. Believe me I could find things to do and to be able to grocery shop on a weekday in the middle of the day is a dream of mine instead of fighting the working crowd in evenings and weekends. I would definitely be involved in my sons school and be able to do all the mommy and me activities at the library and all the mommy and me exercise classes are during workdays.

Right now I work 40+ hours a week at a job I hate and have 2 degrees that I do nothing with because the job market is too competitive and the second they hear kids in an interview its over. To answer the guilt question no it doesn't ever go away. I have a 9 year old and an 11 week old and my son has always asked me why I have to work and why I can't stay home. He still asks why I can't stay home so he could just ride the bus home everyday. My son has grown up in a day care center and now at a private sitter in my school district. My daughter also goes to the same sitter and will essentially grow up there. Most of my husbands paycheck goes to pay this sitter and before you ask why does not one of us stay home he carries the health insurance so my paycheck is used for the rest of our bills.

My husbands family lives locally and not one of them has offered to help us in anyway as far as child care. His mother (who sits home all day) has told us that she raised her kids she is done. Well she didn't raise her kids she sent my hubby and his sister off to live with their father. She lives 4 miles away and has not seen my kids in 2 months. My family is all 12 hours away so they help when they come to visit. Those of you with family that helps out you have no idea how lucky you are never take advantage of that. I have also had my sister in law make comments to me about how I let strangers raise my children and that I should not have had kids if I can't stay home with them. She lives in a house owned by her parents so of course she can stay home with her kids she has no rent or mortgage and I am not sure about you all but that is my biggest expense.

So no the guilt never goes away especially when I was forced back to work after only 6 weeks. Work for me is my only social time too since I am not a local and do not have friends that are local, but I still spend most of the work day alone too that is why I am always on MFP. In fact right now talking about them being at a sitter while I am here at work makes me feel guilty. I think that is why when I do get out of work I spend as much time with them as possible before they go to bed.

Don't feel bad. My kids love daycare. When we moved /had baby 2 I stayed home for 18 months and my oldest was thrilled to go back to daycare full time.