Tell him that if he services your car too, you will put in a good word for him with that girl.

I'm sure that if the girl not only thinks he is a "nice guy" because he serviced her car, but also hears it from several different sources then clearly she will see the light.
If that was me, I'd actually do that for real, to see what he replies.

But who knows... maybe there will be a happy ending to this story after all and we're just a bunch of bitter critters.

Yea and when was the last time we all agreed on something... I think I may have just triggered the end of the world lol

Put your heads between your knees and kiss your as[url]ses goodbye....

Thanks Jen... :frown:
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If the world is about to end, I'd rather have someone else's head between my knees

What I mean by that is, sometimes men (inb4 kit)

It's cool, you already added the "sometimes" disclaimer. My problem would be if you had said "men ALWAYS" or something like that.

I think she's told him she sees him as a friend (this will help her conscience) but leaves the door open so that she can string him along to kepp getting what she wants.

^^ this ^^ EXACTLY!!

What I mean by that is, sometimes men (inb4 kit)

It's cool, you already added the "sometimes" disclaimer. My problem would be if you had said "men ALWAYS" or something like that.

You have earned a personal disclaimer kit. Congratulations.

Yes, this amuses me, I just want to see it applied to the correct situations :devil:

Your friend sounds like he's got a bit of codependency in him. Trust me, I know the symptoms all too well.

I'm a single guy whose had only 1 girlfriend, who has had 'toxic' gal pals that would utilize said codependent nature to advantage. The ones that wouldn't really change their ways have moved on, because my "enabling" nature was no longer theirs to command. The ones that actually respected me when I started putting foot down have stuck around.

I too have a LTR mandate and have no issues to change.

She only sees you as a threat because you're seen as someone who can take her little "puppy dog" away. Someone who might be able to wake him up and make him realize exactly what she's doing. Now, this might not make her necessarily a completely evil manipulative person. All though, there is certainly room for that one particular chance. She might be just as codependent too and not realize it. One of the few toxic friends I had, she had/has/had/has (etc, ad nasuem) that same kind of attention seeking behavior. She doesn't even realize what she's doing, but it's such a learned behavior that it's almost pure instinctual level. Then, she constantly wonders why guys "get signals" even though she sets them straight about being just friends. She's programmed to overcompensate because a part of her wants that attention she's not getting from a constant string of toxic/abusive boyfriends. Anyways, diverging track here. Whatever the case, he needs to start pulling back the favors and the placation, start planting feet if he's jumping the moment she says ju...and cant finish with the mp.


I'd say he needs to look hard core at his over-appeasing nature, and even look into codependency (because his story sounds way too hauntingly familiar to my own experiences with my codependency issues). Even if it's not that, and maybe just something simple as loneliness that's causing his reaction, I get it. I'm working towards my seventh year without a girlfriend and was working on a seventh year without a date (I recently restarted that clock a few months back...yay?). He needs just to back down, step back, take a breather, whatever terminology is preferred and sort out his feelings without her constant presence....