AAARRRGGHH! (Bangs head on wall)
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RJ74
Posts: 37 Member
I'm SO ready to throw in the towel and wear sweatpants for the rest of my life. Today I weighed myself. After 1 year of MFP, I am UP 6 lbs. total. In that year, I have completed P90X, Insanity, 4 stages of NROLFW and am in the final stage of P90X2. I have eaten everything from 1400 calories to 2100 (6 week "reset" back in September). I have tried each calorie "variation" for at least 3 weeks. I haven't lost any inches, either. My clothes are tighter, my arms are chubbier, heck, even my bras are getting too small. I am definitely stronger as I can do "regular" push-ups like nobody's business. I am 5'4", 162 lbs. (as of today) and 38 years old. I work at a desk job 6 hours a day, have two kids (10 and 12 years old) and spend afternoons helping with homework, cooking dinner, shuttling to and from football practices. Weekends are more active as that's when I clean, do laundry, etc. We also try and get in a hike, bike ride or some other form of activity during the weekend.
For the past two weeks, I decided to eat 1850 on workout days (4 sometimes 5 days a week) and 1550 on rest days. That resulted in a one pound gain. Officially heavier than I've been since losing 30 lbs. 5 years ago on Weight Watchers. I maintained that loss for 3 years, then weight started creeping back on.
I have done Scooby's, Fat-to-Fit, etc. compulsively. My BMR is 1398 to 1426 depending on the sight. My TDEE is 1917 w/ "light activity" and 2161 w/ "Moderate activity".
Oh, and my husband, whom I love dearly and has been nothing but supportive, started working out and watching what he eats about a year ago. He's lost 10 lbs. and looks amazing. Healthier, stronger and better than he's ever looked in our 16 years of marriage.
I'm just tired. Tired of trying so hard and seeing NO results. Tired of thinking about it. Tired of talking about it. Tired of not liking how I look. Tired of feeling sorry for myself. Tired of waking up early to exercise every morning and trying to convince myself it's worth it. Tired. Sigh.
Sorry for the "poor me" post. Just needed to vent and my poor husband has heard it way too many times.
For the past two weeks, I decided to eat 1850 on workout days (4 sometimes 5 days a week) and 1550 on rest days. That resulted in a one pound gain. Officially heavier than I've been since losing 30 lbs. 5 years ago on Weight Watchers. I maintained that loss for 3 years, then weight started creeping back on.
I have done Scooby's, Fat-to-Fit, etc. compulsively. My BMR is 1398 to 1426 depending on the sight. My TDEE is 1917 w/ "light activity" and 2161 w/ "Moderate activity".
Oh, and my husband, whom I love dearly and has been nothing but supportive, started working out and watching what he eats about a year ago. He's lost 10 lbs. and looks amazing. Healthier, stronger and better than he's ever looked in our 16 years of marriage.
I'm just tired. Tired of trying so hard and seeing NO results. Tired of thinking about it. Tired of talking about it. Tired of not liking how I look. Tired of feeling sorry for myself. Tired of waking up early to exercise every morning and trying to convince myself it's worth it. Tired. Sigh.
Sorry for the "poor me" post. Just needed to vent and my poor husband has heard it way too many times.
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Sounds like your all over the board over that 1 year. Trying a bunch of programs and doing a bunch of things. You said you tried things for atleast 3 weeks, then if you notice no change do you switch, have you tried anything for 3 months+?
You said your in the final stage of P90X2, what does the nutrition guide say you should be eating? I am sure it gave you 1 number to eat daily probably in the upper levels of your calories now.. The programs your doing are no joke and sounds like you are just stuck in a plateau... up down the same lbs depending when you get on the scale.
I am sure others will give advice and I will just give my 2 cents as well.. this is all barring any sort of thyroid issue, or medication that could be stunting any sort of metabolic rate etc etc..
Eat 1800-2000 calories daily, change your macro's to 40/40/20 (pro/carb/fat), don't track exercise calories in MFP (5-6 days of exercise 1 hr I am guessing), and hit your numbers. Stick with this for a few months. Or the next program you do (maybe p90x/hybrid insanity) you eat what the guide tells you and the macro's.. but your own food/recipes stuff if you want.0 -
I understand totally. I have not seen the rapid weight loss that others have, but I have seen inches lost. It is a battle and a mind game. My husband who I love dearly can eat whatever he wants and never gain weight. Your NSV's are pretty amazing. Not to many people can say they not only finished P90X but moved to P90X2. What seems to be working for me is to eat the same calorie count all week (with the exception of Saturday). I tried to juggle numbers on workout days and rest days but it got me no where. All I can offer is a Hang In There and we are here when you need to vent.0
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Sounds like your all over the board over that 1 year. Trying a bunch of programs and doing a bunch of things. You said you tried things for atleast 3 weeks, then if you notice no change do you switch, have you tried anything for 3 months+?
You said your in the final stage of P90X2, what does the nutrition guide say you should be eating? I am sure it gave you 1 number to eat daily probably in the upper levels of your calories now.. The programs your doing are no joke and sounds like you are just stuck in a plateau... up down the same lbs depending when you get on the scale.
I am sure others will give advice and I will just give my 2 cents as well.. this is all barring any sort of thyroid issue, or medication that could be stunting any sort of metabolic rate etc etc..
Eat 1800-2000 calories daily, change your macro's to 40/40/20 (pro/carb/fat), don't track exercise calories in MFP (5-6 days of exercise 1 hr I am guessing), and hit your numbers. Stick with this for a few months. Or the next program you do (maybe p90x/hybrid insanity) you eat what the guide tells you and the macro's.. but your own food/recipes stuff if you want.
This is some pretty sound advice, although I think the calories may be a bit too high, If your TDEE is 2161 you should eat at around 1750. But, you need to try this and stick to it for longer than 3 weeks. Your body takes time to adjust.
I would also go to your doctor just to rule out the possibility of a medical condition.
On the other hand, you deserve a round of applause for sticking to it for this long with no results. And you say you are stronger; that's another NSV.0 -
Thanks for letting me whine.
Greenrun99- after I read your response I realized it probably did sound like I had "commitment" issues regarding calorie levels. I should clarify by saying that after I did my "reset" in September, I cut down to 1900. I ate that consistently for about 5 weeks and gained weight. So I figured my TDEE was probably less than what all the sites were estimating. So, I dropped 100 calories at a time, giving each new number about 3 weeks to see if it worked. I just kept gaining. That's why I decided to try varying the number on workout vs. rest days. Sorry for I wasn't very clear about that.
Also, I had all my "levels" checked at my last physical and all are normal. I eat 35/35/30 macros and usually do pretty well at hitting my protein. If I have it higher than that, it messes with my stomach.
When I started P90X last March, it had me eating at 1800. That's what I did. I did see some inches lost with that, but they "came back" when I started NROLFW. However, that's also when I did my reset, so I expected to gain some back. It just never left again!
Happy2Be- Thanks for the kind words. Sometimes it helps just knowing I'm not the only one struggling.0 -
Hang in there, RJ. I hear where you are coming from. I did a reset and when I didn't see a downward trend with my cut, I thought perhaps my BMR/TDEE was lower than the calculators due to due to a suppressed metabolism. So I kept dropping my calories and still no loss, some gain, some loss but ultimately sticking to around the same weight. I am back to increasing my calories 100 calories a month. I will keep increasing them until I see a definite gain and then estimate my TDEE at the point I wasn't gaining then work off of that.
Didn't gain it all overnight and won't lose it overnight. I am remaining committed to doing this the safe way so I can be successful in the long run.
In case any one is wondering, the weight loss in the ticker is from WW... It was 10-15 pounds more until the reset process....0 -
Thanks for letting me whine.
Greenrun99- after I read your response I realized it probably did sound like I had "commitment" issues regarding calorie levels. I should clarify by saying that after I did my "reset" in September, I cut down to 1900. I ate that consistently for about 5 weeks and gained weight. So I figured my TDEE was probably less than what all the sites were estimating. So, I dropped 100 calories at a time, giving each new number about 3 weeks to see if it worked. I just kept gaining. That's why I decided to try varying the number on workout vs. rest days. Sorry for I wasn't very clear about that.
Also, I had all my "levels" checked at my last physical and all are normal. I eat 35/35/30 macros and usually do pretty well at hitting my protein. If I have it higher than that, it messes with my stomach.
When I started P90X last March, it had me eating at 1800. That's what I did. I did see some inches lost with that, but they "came back" when I started NROLFW. However, that's also when I did my reset, so I expected to gain some back. It just never left again!
Happy2Be- Thanks for the kind words. Sometimes it helps just knowing I'm not the only one struggling.
I too gained on a cut. That does NOT mean that your TDEE is wrong. In fact, it probably means that your body isn't ready for a cut and you should return to TDEE for a while. Cutting more calories is never the answer. I have a BML so I know my TDEE and eat what it tells me to. You might want to reset again!0 -
This is my first post in this group, so I hope I'm not overstepping my bounds. But anyway, you might want to get your BMR/RMR tested. I haven't been able to lose weight in 4 years. I have tried WW, counting calories, low carb, you name it. Nothing has worked. My doctor tested my thyroid, hormones, blood sugar, etc and it all came back normal. He finally suggested I get my RMR tested. I googled the testing in my city and found a nutritionist who does it for a pretty good price.
All the websites/calculators say my BMR should be around 1550. For years, I've based my calories around that number and what they also say my TDEE should be. Turns out I wasn't eating nearly enough, I guess. The test, which it supposed to be pretty accurate, said my BMR was 2010, RMR is 2140, TDEE is anywhere from 2800-3400, depending on how much exercise that day.
I've upped my calories to 2400 for the last two weeks. That was kind of scary. But I did it anyway. I haven't lost anything yet, but my clothes are starting to fit better, I sleep much better through the night, and have TONS more energy. Believe me, I understand your frustration. Hang in there! And see if you can find a place to get your RMR tested. It might give you some insight into why you aren't losing.0 -
If you can afford both, go for RMR and Bodpod or water-displacement for BF% measurement.
If only money for one, go for BF%.
Because BMR based on LBM is usually within 5% UNLESS you have been doing a lot of endurance cardio. Then BMR will be tad lower, RMR could be real lower.
So RMR test may show you it's lower than expected for age, height, weight. Or higher as in above example.
But is it lower or higher than expected for your LBM? Hate to eat lower and burn some off.
But if you don't know it, is it right for real LBM, or really suppressed from what it could be?
Scroll up to my last post in that topic, and the one right above it, and see the case for someone that got their RMR tested and thought it was incredibly low - it wasn't, for her BF% anyway.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/886127-my-rmr-low-at-875-working-to-increase-it?page=1#posts-13992966
Both are great, BF% is better. Great starting point too. Let's you see how far off any other methods you may use are, and tweak those to keep better track down the road.
To your stats, which I'm sure you know, have you used this, and nailed your activity levels better?
And start with best estimate of BF% (outside BodPod or other), BMR, TDEE, and log your progress.
Whatever it comes up with, have you already been eating around that amount daily?
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/813720-spreadsheet-bmr-tdee-deficit-macro-calcs-hrm-zones0 -
Are you certain about the calories you are eating? Do you record everything? Do you measure and weigh your foods? How are you measuring your calorie burn.
Love your commitment and dedication. I'm sure you are healthier, stronger, have more stamina than before you started exercising. Keep focusing on your health!0 -
Wow, thank you guys for the encouragement! I really appreciate the thought and effort that went into all your replies. I am looking into getting the BF% testing done at least, possibly the RMR. I just started back to school to get my nursing degree, so money is a little tight these days. But, I think it would be really helpful, so might just bite the bullet and get it done.
Holleysings- What does BML stand for? Body Media something? Do you feel like it gives you an accurate count each day? I've thought about something like that, also.
Heybales- I have to tell you that my husband is a lover of anything spreadsheet and gets WAY too excited about making them. He was SO impressed with yours when I showed it to him. He tips his hat to you, sir. Anyways, I did do yours, but feel like I was guessing on much of the activity level amounts. Every day is so different depending on kids schedule, etc. The only constant is my exercise, my 6 hour work day and that I spend at least 1/2 hour cooking dinner every night. Anyways, as I mentioned, I appreciate your thoughts and expertise. Definitely looking into the testing thing.
Karaks- that's interesting that your RMR was higher than you thought. I feel like I just keep gaining, so mine must be lower. Such a guessing game, though. Will be interested to hear how upping your calories works for you. Keep me updated!
Skbarton- thanks for the reminder to take a deep breath.
DoingitNow- I do weigh/measure my food. My husband and I prepare most of our breakfasts/lunches for the week on Sundays. That way it's all planned out and I can measure each serving of eggs, etc. I try and log everything, but do admit that the occasional bite will go unlogged. However, it's not often enough that I feel like it would make a big difference. Calorie burn is tough to measure. I am doing P90X2 and use a HRM. There is kind of a mix of cardio and weights in this phase, so my heart rate usually stays elevated for the entire 45 minute workout. HRM says I burn about 550-600 calories per workout, but I think that's kind of high. Usually count it as 300-400 when logging.
Anyways, again, I appreciate the encouragement and do feel better today. Picking myself up by the bootstraps and all that.0 -
Have you ever been evaluated for a hormonal issue?0
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Karaks- that's interesting that your RMR was higher than you thought. I feel like I just keep gaining, so mine must be lower. Such a guessing game, though. Will be interested to hear how upping your calories works for you. Keep me updated!
Actually, my weight gain was why I thought my RMR was lower too. I thought I had low thyroid function initially and had my doctor test me for it. I had gained about 25lbs over a period of 4 years, while working out 5-6 days a week doing things like Insanity and P90X. I couldn't figure out why I was gaining. In the last two weeks that I've been eating more, my weight gain (so far) seems to have stopped and my clothes are fitting better. I know we are all different, so my situation might not apply to you, but I just thought I'd put it out there. Weight gain for seemingly no reason is so frustrating, so I know how you must feel. But you are doing a great job anyway, so hang in there! 0 -
Wow, thank you guys for the encouragement! I really appreciate the thought and effort that went into all your replies. I am looking into getting the BF% testing done at least, possibly the RMR. I just started back to school to get my nursing degree, so money is a little tight these days. But, I think it would be really helpful, so might just bite the bullet and get it done.
Holleysings- What does BML stand for? Body Media something? Do you feel like it gives you an accurate count each day? I've thought about something like that, also.
BodyMedia Link. It gives me a fairly accurate TDEE each day. It's very helpful! It means I don't have to rely on the calculators.0 -
Heybales- I have to tell you that my husband is a lover of anything spreadsheet and gets WAY too excited about making them. He was SO impressed with yours when I showed it to him. He tips his hat to you, sir. Anyways, I did do yours, but feel like I was guessing on much of the activity level amounts. Every day is so different depending on kids schedule, etc. The only constant is my exercise, my 6 hour work day and that I spend at least 1/2 hour cooking dinner every night. Anyways, as I mentioned, I appreciate your thoughts and expertise. Definitely looking into the testing thing.
Do remember on the non-exercise daily activity, even sedentary has some normal moving around and walking time included already in the estimate daily, so cooking would be covered.
So you might need to examine the 2 hrs not covered by work day, if that work day is sedentary desk job. If that 2 hrs is spent with the moving around a lot for kids, then that is not covered by base time, and likely would be 10 hrs weekly in like service trades.
But if that is chance to come home, sit down, and take care of some other business, then still covered by sedentary.
But that small difference also means the variety for your activity isn't going to change much when you average it out weekly. Just include some of what applies.
But you'll notice, it doesn't change things too terribly much really. Those 2 lines really matter for a job really on your feet the whole 35-40 hrs weekly. That makes a difference between 1.25 and 1.35 BMR multiplier.
Sounds like you got good plan down.0 -
RJ - Youve gotten some great advice. Just wanted to cheer you on. Its so frustrating when you feel you are doing everything *right* and then no results....no other info, just some encouragement
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I just wanted to say thanks for posting this. What an awesome spreadsheet! I can't imagine the time and effort it took to develop and type out. I like seeing the numbers, so this is a great way to keep track of progress. Thanks again! 0
