looking for friends - having trouble gaining weight too

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vulgarities
vulgarities Posts: 7 Member
hey, I was just wondering if anyone wanted to add me if you also struggle with weight gain (for whatever reason; I personally have an eating disorder & a medical condition + genetics and so mentally I struggle as well as physically to gain weight). I'm 5'1" and 59lbs (26.8kg) so I have a lot to gain and I'm not doing well with it. I'm going to start outpatient treatment again and I really want to give that a good solid try. I am sick of being in hospitals, I want to prove to myself that I can gain at least some weight on my own!

anyway, add me if you're interested in extra support. :)

Replies

  • ijiiii
    ijiiii Posts: 61
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    I don't know what caused you to end up the way you are now, but best of luck to you to turn your life around for good! How long have been under 90lbs? I can imagine if your body has been thin for so long, it'll be real hard for your stomach and the rest of your body to properly ingest foods.

    Have any concrete goals as far as food intake?
  • vulgarities
    vulgarities Posts: 7 Member
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    I don't know what caused you to end up the way you are now, but best of luck to you to turn your life around for good! How long have been under 90lbs? I can imagine if your body has been thin for so long, it'll be real hard for your stomach and the rest of your body to properly ingest foods.

    Have any concrete goals as far as food intake?

    thanks. I've been underweight for ~6 years. I've been around 60-65lbs for the past 2 years.

    anyway, we can just message about the rest. thanks for getting in contact with me! :)

    good luck everyone.
  • ava_bacardi
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    This is your first step!! I can not imagine how painful it is. I know you will do well reason being YOU WANT TO!!! And when you want something so bad, you began to desire it, you began to see yourself being it!!! And what really matters is that you are doing it for you!!! we may not know each other but i feel your pain!!! I would love to support you!!:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
    Ava B.:love:
  • EJ14
    EJ14 Posts: 2
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    I can only imagin what you are going through. Although my problem for not gaining weight is that I don't eat enough, extra support for someone and from someone is always important. Good luck with everything and we're here to support you as well.
  • HeenaBajaj
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    I have been under weight all my life... I am 26 years old and weigh only 43 kgs. I look anorexic. I have issues in eating. Sometimes I feel it is psychological. But sometimes, very rarely I feel hungry and when I eat I get full very fast. My daily consumption is also less. I am culturally a Punjabi from India and our food consumption does include fats.. but for some reason I never gain wieght may be because of quantity. But even if I want to.... I can't eat or hog. My work is very stressfull and also involves irregular meals....

    Don't know what to do????
  • VeggyGal
    VeggyGal Posts: 25 Member
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    Wow, I haven't had quite the same problems you have but I'd welcome any friends that are having this problem. It's been hard being able to relate to other friends I have concerning this problem. I also care about my health and don't like consuming large quantities of fattening foods like what is the norm. If you or anyone else wants to friend me it would be great. We all have great struggles in our lives and when we put our all into solving them we can attain a piece of our goals little by little. Don't ever give up!
  • JordanLomb
    JordanLomb Posts: 20 Member
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    I hope that you can get back to a healthy weight along with everyone else. We all joined these forums for support so we should give it to each other as much as we can!
  • SherriAMO
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    I have been under weight all my life... I am 26 years old and weigh only 43 kgs. I look anorexic. I have issues in eating. Sometimes I feel it is psychological. But sometimes, very rarely I feel hungry and when I eat I get full very fast. My daily consumption is also less. I am culturally a Punjabi from India and our food consumption does include fats.. but for some reason I never gain wieght may be because of quantity. But even if I want to.... I can't eat or hog. My work is very stressfull and also involves irregular meals....

    Don't know what to do????

    I think stress and anxiety are a huge part of my problem now. I did have a medical issue which has since been taken care of but i still cant get into eating. For the last few weeks ive been tracking my food mostly to remind myself to eat. For the most part im full or just not interestef after a bite or two. So i track all of my partial servings and try something else. Work is busy/stressful and i often forget to eat or feel guilty for taking so much time to eat when my to do list is so long
  • KaraAlste
    KaraAlste Posts: 168 Member
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    Hope she's still alive......
  • schparklemom
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    Finally! I have found a group of people who have to deal with the flip side of the weight problem. I have always been very thin. Very. My mom used to stand outside the bathroom door, if I excused myself during or directly after a meal. I don't have an eating disorder, of which I am aware. I guess I mean I don't have anorexia or bulimia and I don't use food as an emotional crutch. There's never been a label attached to my situation. That is if you don't count the 'lucky you' nonsense people have been saying to me forever. Yes, I love being a 41 year-old woman with all the curves of a prepubescent boy. I also enjoy being cold all year round, looking positively deathbed bound after a bout with any stomach virus and having COMPLETE strangers feel the need to comment on my build. Why is it ok for someone to say, "Why just look at you. You must NEVER eat." But NOT ok for me to respond with an equally snarky, "Oh! But I do, you just must never stop."

    Sorry for the rant. It's been a long week. I'm, as I said, a 41 y/o woman and I weigh 105 pounds at just under 5'7". I have always been thin. My problem is that I have an incredibly high metabolism and I have to remind myself to eat. I get hungry but if I don't/can't eat in that moment, my appetite just shuts off. If it's breakfast time when that happens, I won't eat all day, unless someone else points it out, because I'm just not hungry. By the time *I'm* the one who realizes I need to eat, I'm so empty and acid-y I'm nauseous, if that strikes a chord with anyone?

    I just restarted a medication that has......yep.....weight loss as a major side effect. I swore to my doctor that I would keep a food diary or something like it and found this app/site. In the first month of the medication, I lost 4 pounds. I'm actually pleased it was that little because of the amount of change occurring in my life. Basically, I would love any tricks, tips, recipes and/or simple ways to incorporate healthy weight gain into life. The best I ever looked and felt was at 29 y/o and had the time and money for a personal trainer to kick my *kitten* 4 times weekly. Now, I have neither the time nor the financial resources for such a luxury. Also, I just remember eating soooooo much chicken and pre-chicken.

    Wow, now everyone knows way too much about me and can judge, by the length and detail of this post, how neurotic I am :smile: . Nevertheless, any advice would be welcome. I'm beginning to look skeletally unhealthy. Thanks.
  • Tabrean
    Tabrean Posts: 12 Member
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    Sorry for the rant. It's been a long week. I'm, as I said, a 41 y/o woman and I weigh 105 pounds at just under 5'7". I have always been thin. My problem is that I have an incredibly high metabolism and I have to remind myself to eat. I get hungry but if I don't/can't eat in that moment, my appetite just shuts off. If it's breakfast time when that happens, I won't eat all day, unless someone else points it out, because I'm just not hungry. By the time *I'm* the one who realizes I need to eat, I'm so empty and acid-y I'm nauseous, if that strikes a chord with anyone?

    Maybe you can do what I have to do to get going in the morning - I have alarms/reminders set on my smart phone that prompt me when to do the next thing - eat breakfast, take a shower, leave the house, etc or else I would never get out on time (thank you, ADHD!). Could you set yourself a series of electronic reminders throughout the day to remind you to grab a bite to eat, anything. I find when I am not that hungry or under a lot of stress that it kills my appetite, it is easier to drink the calories. I am also finding that tracking has helped me be much more conscious of how much and how often I eat or should be eating.
  • paulald77
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    [...] looking positively deathbed bound after a bout with any stomach virus and having COMPLETE strangers feel the need to comment on my build. Why is it ok for someone to say, "Why just look at you. You must NEVER eat." But NOT ok for me to respond with an equally snarky, "Oh! But I do, you just must never stop." [...]

    I know exactly how you feel, weight drops off in minutes but takes months to put on. Also, the people you mention are my pet hate! When someone asks me if I've lost weight I want to ask them if they've put some on. Why is it socially ok (apparently) to talk about me being underweight when i'd be hated for pointing out someones weight gain? Honestly, I wish these people would stop for a second and think that it might be just as hurtful and humiliating for them to comment on me being "skinny" as it would be for me to call them "fat".

    So that's my rant. Between us we're a two woman hate-campaign I think! ;)

    So, my tips. Well that's hard because I, like a lot of you, forget to eat / don't feel hungry and I'm starting to realise that a lot of the problem is a) smoking (yes, I know I should give up), b) hunger doesn't seem to be something my body/mind recognises as an issue and c) I have Coeliac Disease so can't bulk up easily on bread/cake types of food. Recently I've started eating almost constantly because, although I find it impossible to eat when I'm not hungry, I can snack instead if I keep it 'little and often'. So I look for snacks that give me a good amount of calories for very little "effort" like nut bars, crisps, and yogurts. I also eat a large breakfast (courtesy of McDonalds, minus the muffin!) because I've managed to train my body to expect it and that adds a huge boost to my intake.

    I need (approximately) 1400 calories a day to maintain my weight as I'm short and slim built anyway but I'm currently managing 2000-2500 so I'm hopeful I can gain some weight. Any high calorie / low effort tips would be most welcome though, as I'm always on the lookout for those extra calories!! I'm especially keen to not have to eat junk to get those calories because I don't really want to drop dead from a heart-attack just as I reach my ideal weight :(
  • Tabrean
    Tabrean Posts: 12 Member
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    I do the same thing with snacks - I look for things that are high calorie but easy to eat, and hopefully not all junk. I keep a supply of energy/protein bars in my desk at work, bananas, yogurt with added fruit and granola (full fat is my preference but I'm usually stuck with low fat unless I bring some from home - full fat yogurt is so hard to find!). I am a sucker for the pudding from the work cafe, an easy 320 calories. Nuts are a good healthy snack. 1/4 cup of peanuts or almonds has about 200 calories. I can easily go through a can of peanuts or cashews (not a fan of almonds) without thinking about it. I don't have much stomach capacity for giant meals, so eating something regularly ever 2-3 hours is the best way for me to get the calories I need to maintain.

    MFP tells me I need 1480 calories to maintain my weight, but reality is I need 2000-2500 just to maintain. I imagine I'd have to consistently stay above 2500 to gain. :-/

    Nicotine acts as an appetite suppressant. If you can manage to give up smoking or cut down, you may find you have more appetite. I know weight gain is the biggest concern among people I know who have quit smoking. Once they stop smoking they find they are more hungry, eat more, and gain weight. In your case, this could be to your advantage.