Finding a therapist that you trust and have a good relationship with is key. It has to help and not hinder your progress. I have had the same therapist for over 4 years now and I love her. I haven't been able to go recently due to losing my health ins when hubby lost his job, but I am hoping to talk to her soon because I can tell the difference in myself when i don't get to see her. I know that when I am able to talk about things I feel better overall and that extends to my whole well being.

Maybe try writing a journal and seeing if getting things down on paper will help you stay accountable to yourself. And definitely rely on friends to talk to when you need it or feel yourself slipping into a bad place.

Hope that this helps and that you can find what is right for you

Yes, I have a therapist. Not seeing her right now, but am tempted to give her a call since I am suffering again. She was referred to me by my best friend. I honestly love my therapist. She has 3 times pulled me out of serious issues and kept me on the mend. She has a way of explaining things to me..simply. Helping me build self-worth and to love myself unconditionally. I was adopted (in family) and have lots of issues with self-esteem, social anxiety, depression. Honestly, my experience with being adopted was negative...just because of the way I was raised. I also almost drowned at age 7 and that was very traumatic for me. My 6 yr old cousin did drown. (later in life I found out he was actually my half-brother).

Make sure you find a therapist you like and are getting results. Keep searching til you find a great one! I have had twice weekly appt's and weekly appts for sometimes as long as 7 months. I always look forward to that appointment and I always leave feeling better. It's one appt. I never cancelled!

And, yes, I have made progress on my own. She gave me great tips, mostly visual's to help me stay positive. I give her all the credit in helping me get off blood pressure medications and learning how to deal with anxiety better and reducing my panic attack episodes to almost non-existent.

Good luck and I hope you find one you are completely happy with!

Yes i have a psychologist, who ive known for 5 years, but i left her once for a year and a half, because i didnt think she was helping. But all my doctors say that psychology is the main treatment for bpd and that i couldnt get better without her...so i went back to her. I love her alot but i just feel like were going through the motions and not actually doing anything constructive and worthwhile. I have felt frustrated for a long time now. Last week i told her everything and she was like well i can refer you to my colleague who is more experienced, but then i felt rejected (yes BPD all over) and i want her to change what shes doing not give me to someone else. It doesnt help that where i live they dont offer DBT which is the most-effective therapy for my condition. I just feel like nothing has changed in 5 years...and seeing her is stopping me doing other things i want in my life like getting a full time job or course or moving away, because she is NHS she only sees patients from 9.30am until 4.30pm monday to friday and only caters for the borough. I think she lets me off with things a little too much and doesnt really hold me accountable or thinks im more fragile than i am, even with day to day things. Like i left college after only an hour on both days i was meant to go and she was like, 'just do what you can manage right now' and im thinking, i can manage it, i just dont want to bloody go. And if i dont do what she says theres never any consequences and i know i should be wanting to do it for myself btu i just dont. But she started seeing me when i was only 17 and very vulnerable and I think it messed our roles up a bit. But i know she cares, sometimes caring just isnt enough, is it?


Sorry for the rant...lol

kelly_a, I feel ya. I've got issues with self-esteem, social anxiety, depression too... actually i have a down right social phobia. I haven't even been able to talk to my best friend or dad on the phone for almost 3 years. Thank god for the internet. I used to be extremely outgoing and social. But 4 years ago something switched in me, still don't know what, and I started getting panic attacks several times a day and floods of anxiety. I have a lot of issues because of childhood too. I wasn't adopted but my mom married 4 times and 3 out of the 4 were physically and mentally abusive, and there was sexual abuse too. We were a very dysfunctional family, and I was a chronic runaway in my teens. Even had missing posters with a reward for about 6 months out for me when I was 16. Then I married an abuser at 19. I'm with a good, safe guy now, but I've still got issues a plenty.

petstorekitty, I'm glad self help books work for you. I have a hard time getting into them myself. I've tried to listen to a couple on audiobook but couldn't get through them.

charlieelizab, When you say BPD you're talking about Bipolar Disorder right? I have heard that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is what I should be looking for. I have Bipolar 1 Disorder. But I don't know anything about CBT or DBT, it's not available where I live either... at least not anyone who accepts my insurance does it. But do! I think you should rant all you like. It's ok with me! Sometimes a good rant just makes us feel better, get **** off our chest. ;-)

Im not talking about bipolar disorder, im talking about Borderline Personality Disorder. I cant do the self help stuff either...i just sit there and think 'what a load of crap...' for something to work, i think you have to believe it works...

Update:
I made an appointment with a therapist for Wednesday.
I started crying at lunch. I've been meaning to find a therapist since I've been transitioning between meds.

I think I do OK most of the time, but holy hell, I've just been crap lately.

I'm nervous about my appointment. There's just so damn much to tell a new therapist!
And I always come off as being 'level headed' but, I really want help

Thinking I should write some stuff down or something..

If i could delete that last post, i would, it's clear to me now that a week ago when i had that experience i was having hallucinations.. That happenned to me (the same kind of thing) with a different therapist about 10 years ago, and now i that i remember it I am confident that the below was all based on a hallucination.

-Rob

I have a therapist, she helps a lot... Though last session, after 4-5 years with her, i suddenly realized her face looked exactly like the person whom for lack of a better word i obsessed about for years -- the center of my illness at times -- and it kind of freaked me out -- especially because i see my therapist outside of therapy at times too (I helped her move into her new apartment a few months ago, we used to bike together, and the last 2 years we've gone to Disney World on the other side of the country together, and she wanted to go again this year with me in November).. So it kind of spooked me out that i suddenly felt that she was not only someone i knew, but someone whom made me crazy in the first place... Incidentally, i know as much as the person i thought she looked like definitely studied psychology in college.. I broke the obsession about 2 years ago, though, when i talked to the "real person" on facebook and understood that they were married with grown kids and i didn't want to interfere... Gosh, this is turning into therapy right here..

-Rob

I've been seeing therapists ever since i can remember. Two days ago, after a lot of thought I "broke up" with a therapist who was very attentive, genuine and caring... but after 6months he wasn't helping me AT ALL. In fact I have two panic attacks in session with him on two separate occasions. So now I'm without a therapist. I live in a relatively small community with few options for therapy. I'm also on government insurance, which hardly anyone accepts and the only way I can afford therapy is if they do it on a sliding scale fee. I'm kind of freaked out to be without a therapist. But at the same time I'm thinking, maybe this is my chance to stop focusing on what is wrong with me and start realizing the things I can do and am capable of... ?

I don't know. I felt like being in therapy meant I was working on getting better, and I'm not sure if I will be able to work on getting better by myself.

Do you have a therapist? If so are they helping you? And if you don't have one, do you feel ok without one, and have you been able to make personal progress on your own?