Need advice...new and waiting to be approved for RNY.
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atruitt31
Posts: 1 Member
I'm in the process of getting approved for RNY. I'm excited because I've wanted to do it for several years but am only able to now because my insurance pays for it. Before it was not an option. I have 3 good friends that have had the surgery one 4yrs ago, 3yrs ago and 5 months ago.They all seem to be doing great and have been able to be successful. The most recent friend had a to have another surgery because her intestine became twisted, though she wouldn't change a thing.
I guess I am just getting cold feet and worried that it won't work for me or that I'll have a bad side effect. My mom just passed away 2 months ago from colon cancer and I know she would want me to do it to get healthy, but I am just scared. I gained 25lbs last year and have gained 10 since mom passed. UGH! I know it is stress related but I can't seem to break this vicious cycle.
Should I see a therapist before I go in for surgery? I'm afraid I'm fixing the wrong organ when I should be fixing my brain.
Can you tell I'm flip flopping between wanting to and not wanting too? lol
PS I have to lose the 10lbs I've gained before July1st or else insurance won't approve! Yikes!
I guess I am just getting cold feet and worried that it won't work for me or that I'll have a bad side effect. My mom just passed away 2 months ago from colon cancer and I know she would want me to do it to get healthy, but I am just scared. I gained 25lbs last year and have gained 10 since mom passed. UGH! I know it is stress related but I can't seem to break this vicious cycle.
Should I see a therapist before I go in for surgery? I'm afraid I'm fixing the wrong organ when I should be fixing my brain.
Can you tell I'm flip flopping between wanting to and not wanting too? lol
PS I have to lose the 10lbs I've gained before July1st or else insurance won't approve! Yikes!
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How about this: you really want the surgery but are anxious about actually doing it? In which case you need more time at the surgeon's clinic to learn more about what to expect.
There's nothing wrong with your brain but for sure, who can argue against taking help from a therapist or any other professional to loose so much weight?
I had the surgery because I wasn't up for that long walk one more time, and certainly wouldn't be if I had to start all over again after a few years. I gained a better life and likely also longer. That's a victory, even if "not doing it on my own" was a fail. And looking at the statistics, hardly anyone in my weight class succeed in loosing so much without the surgery, it's just a sad fact. And it was only a start, an entry ticket, I still have to count my calories but it's much easier now when I'm hardly ever am really hungry.
My siblings have always suffered more from obesity than I have, but surgery is not an option for them and I respect that very much but the sad part to it is that anxiety plays a large part in all our lifes and theirs more than mine, so I'll always wish they would look at our eating habits and position about surgery from that perspective, but it's not something I would like to suggest, they need to be happy with their lifes in whatever way they choose.
And that's the point isn't it, never to let anyone tell you you're not good enough.
best /swim0 -
My paperwork was just submitted for Gastric-bypass. BEFORE they would even submit for insurance approval, I had a checklist to accomplish with 9 items and believe me it was no easy feat. I had to watch several web-based programs, do a psych evaluation, attend 2 support grp mtgs, see a dietician, do a sleep study and do a Dr.supervised weight loss program in which I had to lose a minimum of 10 lbs plus get a written letter of support. It took me 5 months to get it all done. These bariatric surgeons wanted to see how dedicated you are to have this done. I AM ! ! ! Of course, as soon as they say it's been approved, I will probably feel like you (i.e. cold feet).
I know in my heart it's the right thing to do and my inner voice has never wavered from it. I'm tired of being tired and looking in the mirror and being disgusted with myself. I would like to wear something other than black - don't you? I have other motivations too - My daughter is getting married at the end of this year and I WANT TO LIVE ! ! ! You see on my Dad's side (including him) they drop dead anytime after 55 and I'm 53.
Find your motivation, your goals and the love you have for yourself. Its time for you and once the surgery is complete, you have a whole new "do over" to get it right and enjoy the rest of your life. God bless you my friend and the best of luck on your journey.0 -
I would talk to a therapist about this. My surgeons office required it. For me the benefits out weighed the risks and by staying overweight I was killing myself anyways. I went into it with a new out look on life as well. I changed the way I think about exercise and food. I wish you all the best. Sometimes the mental head games can be the worst. There are days when I still think I am 303 pounds and have to look in the mirror to remind myself that I am not.0
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I would say there definitely is a mental battle that is being fought for all of us who choose surgery. Actually for anyone who seriously makes lifestyle changes for weight loss... we MUST teach ourselves new ways to interact with food and drink. It is so hard because so much of what we learn is based on culture and the media (I woke up after surgery to find my husband watching TV in my hospital room and a commercial for some pizza place came on and I actually thought how delicious that looked to the point that I could nearly taste it!). The great thing about surgery is that it forces us to change our habits for a short time, which makes it easier to make those become our new habits. I refuse to overeat because it is just too uncomfortable, but I am fully aware that there will be a day that I will be able to take more food in and just because I CAN does not mean I SHOULD! But with that said, I am actually fighting the opposite battle today. I donated blood yesterday and did not start my morning with my usual (low carb, high protein) yogurt. I spent the entire evening battling dizziness and lightheaded-ness. Today I don't really want my yogurt either, but I know I need the protein and so I am forcing myself to eat it. There was a time not long ago that I would have said to myself, "Self, it does not matter what you need or what is good for you. If you don't' want to do something, then don't." But now, I have had enough with health ups-and-downs that I refuse to take that advice and I will follow through with what I must do to stay healthy.
My advice to you is to seek a therapist and talk this out with them, but keep moving forward with the surgery plans as well. It is a great combination. If you can find a therapist who has assisted folks before and after WLS, so much the better! My surgeon's office provides one as part of the plan, but they also encourage everyone to have some type of strong support system in place, whether it is within or external to their office.
Good luck to you!0
