Really Struggling!

kargesa
kargesa Posts: 13 Member
My partner is gone and I feel like crap. My go to is food, but while counting calories I get stressed out watching the numbers tip over my limit. There is only so much exercise I can do in a day without hurting myself or burning myself out for the next day. I’m kind of at a loss. Do I just give up? That can’t be the answer… I’m just not sure what else to do?

Replies

  • RickyLuvsMary4ever
    RickyLuvsMary4ever Posts: 56 Member
    Do not give in and do not give up!

    Don't want your calories to go over the limit, plan your meals better. Eat more often so you don't feel hungry. Learn the difference between taste buds or boredom hungry and true hunger.

    I cannot give a lot of advice, because I don't know where your weakness is.

    I have lost 45 of the 166 I need to lose, but it has not been sheer willpower, it has been planning, being easy on myself and enjoying the journey! I didn't think I could but I have let others success stories inspire me.
  • ThePrimalSpartan
    ThePrimalSpartan Posts: 59 Member
    I've been having a tough couple of days myself. But asking for support is the best first step in the right direction anyone can do. I've needed to lean on my friends who are going through their own weight loss/fitness journeys for support to pull me out of the rut too. There's nothing, absolutely nothing, wrong with saying you need help. Do you have any friends who can help you along the way? Even if they're not actively trying to lose weight, they can still be there for you to listen.

    Also, what do you like to do that's not a) working out or b) eating/involves food? Don't know? FIND OUT! Finding things that relieve all the stress from daily life is absolutely necessary to be successful in anything. Take 30 minutes of YOU time a day. Hell, even 10 minutes works too! For me, reading and taking baths are the best, healthy stress relievers.

    Feel free to message me for support/encouragement anytime! And feel free to add me as a friend too.

    Hang in there! You CAN do this. One day at a time, one meal at a time. It's a marathon, not a sprint. :)
  • crystaldancing69
    crystaldancing69 Posts: 17 Member
    I can so relate to your situation. I will do great all day, and then blow it the final couple of hours before bed. At those times, when it's quiet and I'm not distracting myself with activity, I can no longer push away the feelings of loneliness and loss. So I eat, and I feel better for a while, it distracts me, and I can push it away for a while. But then of course I will feel guilty and be ashamed that I can't stick to the program, which only makes me want to eat more...a vicious cycle. So I start again, which is all I can really do, keep trying and hope I can heal enough to make some progress. Yesterday I actually made it through a whole day within my caloric goal...here's to one day at a time....try that.
  • PepePants
    PepePants Posts: 47 Member
    I'm sorry you're having a hard time, I've been there and will be again. Here are a few things I do: go for a walk, not for exercise, just to clear my head and step away from the fridge. That also gives me time to think about what's going on because for me, it's often not about the food or feeling hungry it's about anger, boredom, depression, frustration, insert any emotion there. Distraction! Petting the dog, reading a good book, crossword puzzle, tv...anything you like. Sometimes I'll tell myself to just wait. If I can wait it out for 15 minutes, I often don't feel the same urge and can move on. Lastly, a cup of tea can be relaxing and give my mouth something to do without screwing up my day. Good for you for asking for help. That's an excellent first step.
  • DucksandOranges
    DucksandOranges Posts: 96 Member
    Or get out of the house/away from trigger foods? If I keep busy by running errands, taking the dog to the dog park, going to the beach or something like that. I totally agree with PepePants, I am often surprised by how effective distracting myself can be. Cleaning the house is another good one. I usually dont feel like eating after I've been scrubbing the bathroom...

    And feel free to add me too!
  • divainsneakers
    divainsneakers Posts: 397 Member
    Well, since you are emotional eater night is a tough time to begin with. However, I'd assume that you used to spend quality time with your partner during the evenings. Now that your SO is out of the picture you still want the "emotional hit "so to speak. Naturally you look to food - as many of us do - but maybe what you are craving is human interaction. Could you call a friend, join a meet up group, go see a neighbor?
  • danarandallreed
    danarandallreed Posts: 132 Member
    It might be helpful to journal through it. Sometimes it is not about the absence of your partner. It could be something else behind that, or a bit of both. If you exercise after you journal, that is the perfect storm for a breakthrough.
  • vtbutterfly2
    vtbutterfly2 Posts: 1 Member
    I am struggling with this as well. I have been at the point of giving up several times, but keep coming back. That's the important part. Even if you have a bad day, even week, keeping going. And I agree with one of the posts above, planning does help me. Some days I will even have the next day's food already logged and try my best to stick to it. Good luck!
  • Smilely3
    Smilely3 Posts: 21 Member
    Don't give up. I would give snacks like almonds, grapes, and carrots. If you go over your calories one day, just start fresh the next day. Make sure you drink more water to fill up quicker. Stay out of the kitchen and get out of the house.