I am having the very same issue as you are. I'm 5'1 1/2", 47 years old, and 126 lbs. My lifting program is five days a week with all the major compound lifts and just a few isolation lifts and it takes me about 45 minutes to an hour to complete. I also spin for 55 minutes three times a week and do a body works class for an hour once a week. I average about 8 hours in the gym a week. According to Scooby' s Workshop my tdee is 2218 and I should eat 1996, a 10% reduction, to lose. I went with the 5-6 hours a week activity level because the next one up seemed like I should be slaying dragons during my workout and I'm working hard and sweating but not slaying dragons. Lol

I don't even want to discuss the scale because it's making me crazy. I seem to have longer weight loss plateaus where I can go 2+ months without losing, then drop a lb, and then I seem to immediately gain back 2 lbs and hold steady for another month or so before I drop another lb. I have never taken measurements but clothes are getting smaller and I am getting tighter and firmer, SLOWLY. The main issue is that I'm hungry. I was trying to keep my calories to 1800-1900 a day but as of late I've been eating over 1900 and even had one day at 2300. I'm not really sure what to do. I'm only 7 weeks into my lifting program so I keep telling myself to have patience and I'll see results but I'm concerned that eating at the higher calorie level will make my progress even slower. I thought about cutting back on the cardio to get better results but if I do that I'll need to eat even less, and well, I'm hungry. Any suggestions?

How lean are you? As in BF% wise. So are you needing bigger or smaller clothes? If your clothing size is getting smaller then what you are seeing is body recomposition. You are losing fat, but gains in lean mass (most likely water weight from lifting and possibly the smallest bit of noob muscle gains) are hiding the loss from the scale. It happens. Start taking measurements. The scale is great at selling half-truths and false impressions. Measurements have a harder time hiding the truth about recomposition, as do progress photos. If you are hungry, eat. Pick healthy snacks and don't shy away from carbs when you hit your protein goals. Not to say you need to go crazy, but bumping up even to 2000 for a few weeks won't destroy your progress. You may find that it actually works better for you.

I'm about 25-26% bf. The clothes are getting smaller, and this weekend I put on a top that was literally hanging off me, so it is working just really slowly. I'm calorie phobic and did many years of low calorie dieting so the eating at higher calorie levels make me so nervous but I've been getting much better about it.

Had to laugh at the 2000 calories not destroying my progress because I ate about 1995 calories yesterday and woke up feeling a little bloated and then freaked out because I was sure that the extra cals made me gain!! Yes, sometimes I can get a bit obsessed. lol But you are correct, and I don't think that eating 2000 a day would make me gain so I will give it a try. Just wanting this to work so badly and hoping I'm not wasting more time by eating too much. Patience. Must have more patience.