Mean doctors and people in medical profession
TheRainIsGone
Posts: 37
I've experienced some very rude and cruel doctors and people in the medical profession over the years, and it makes me avoid them. It hasn't happened in very recent years, but my past experiences have made me afraid to go unless the issue is severe.
One doctor berated me about my weight when I went to refill my thyroid med, he said he had patients with NO thyroid who weighed less than me. He announced my weight very loudly, with the door open, so everyone in the waiting room could hear him. When I complained about it, he said maybe if he embarrassed me I'd do something about it (as if I didn't try).
Another was an x-ray tech who said (with major accusatory attitude), "HOW MUCH do you WEIGH?!" Then she gave a disgusted sigh and told me not to get on the steel table, I might break it, she'd have to pull out the portable machine. (I was about 300 pounds at the time.)
I've heard about gynecologists belittling and criticizing my own friends and family, and looked for a fat female gyno (or OBGYN) online, hoping to avoid more embarrassment. They are not easy to find, so I haven't been in years.
In reading up on them, I've learned that many obese women get turned away by gynos, because they say they can't do a proper exam due to the fat. You're in such a vulnerable position there, I just can't bear to subject myself to it.
Just wondering if any of you have had similar experiences, and if it keeps you from going to the doctor as you should.
One doctor berated me about my weight when I went to refill my thyroid med, he said he had patients with NO thyroid who weighed less than me. He announced my weight very loudly, with the door open, so everyone in the waiting room could hear him. When I complained about it, he said maybe if he embarrassed me I'd do something about it (as if I didn't try).
Another was an x-ray tech who said (with major accusatory attitude), "HOW MUCH do you WEIGH?!" Then she gave a disgusted sigh and told me not to get on the steel table, I might break it, she'd have to pull out the portable machine. (I was about 300 pounds at the time.)
I've heard about gynecologists belittling and criticizing my own friends and family, and looked for a fat female gyno (or OBGYN) online, hoping to avoid more embarrassment. They are not easy to find, so I haven't been in years.
In reading up on them, I've learned that many obese women get turned away by gynos, because they say they can't do a proper exam due to the fat. You're in such a vulnerable position there, I just can't bear to subject myself to it.
Just wondering if any of you have had similar experiences, and if it keeps you from going to the doctor as you should.
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Oh wow, I'm so sorry to hear you've had those issues with doctors and such! That's horrible and very unprofessional of them! I've had doctors comment that I should lose weight, but never experience anything like you have. I have had them treat me like I wouldn't work for it when I've asked for help loosing, and in turn they just blow me off or just tell me to eat less. Eating "more" wasn't as much of a problem as types of foods, and I would often only eat once a day thinking if I only ate once then no one could say my fat was eating related. (Of corse it was, just not in a constant binging way). I'm thankful my doc now also sees my parents and brother so she sees the family "history and traits" and is very nice to me. When we talk about weight she is empathetic, but also direct when needs to be.
Having a regular doc and regular check-ups is very Important, I hope you can find one you are comfortable with! I'd recommend asking around, maybe even other plus sized people, to get their opinions on docs in your area. Possibly even call offices annonomysly and tell them you're looking for a new doc office and why, and ask how the primary doctor there is with larger patients. It's your right to chose your caretaker and to be comfortable with your care taker!
Good luck!0 -
I think most doctors loose their patience with us. They think we don't try. We don't need anyone to tell us how fat we are.....we can see ourselves in the mirror. That being said....you need to go to the doctor. There are good ones that care. Everytime I go to tmy. doctor he praises me even if I have only lost one pound......he really encourages me and tells he knows I can do it. He is young and starting to build up his practice.....I feel the younger ones want to help......the older ones are the ones that think we don't try.0
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I had a really rude doctor. Really rude. I was a patient of his for about six months, and it ended with me filing a complaint against him. I have lots of stories, but the one that stuck out was this:
I injured my knee in a martial arts class. It hurt like hell. I went to the doctor. He came in, looked at me, sighed, and said "Well, you're overweight so this isn't going to be good." Meanwhile this (insert profanity here) was easily 350 pounds to my, at the time, 260.
Judge not...0 -
My parents are also heavy, and my mother once had three doctors at her bedside in the hospital for (not weight-related) surgery.
She'd gotten her meal and was putting a packet of sugar in her tea (which they had brought on her tray) and one of her docs berated her for using it. He was also overweight, so she spoke up and told him, "You know, people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones." The other docs snickered. I'm so glad she stuck up for herself.
More recently, she went to a specialist who said to her, "Look at all that fat in your stomach!" She also gave it back to him, told him she was leaving and he was NOT going to treat her. She doesn't put up with it but I hate that she has to go through the stress.
Doctors need to be re-trained, I don't think they spend much time on beside manner or "how to treat people with respect" in medical school.
I see "nice" doctors on television and wonder if it's just put-on for TV, because it isn't been my experience or my mother's.
I've thought about calling offices ahead of time and asking if the doctor has issues with overweight patients, but I'm a quiet person and haven't yet worked up the nerve.
It's easier to just stay away.0 -
I had a RAIL thin OBGYN ALWAYS comment on my weight, she's never been heavy and has no idea how it feels.... always made me feel like less of a person and even after I LOST 30 pounds, went in for a checkup she still made the comment about losing weight.. when I told her I had already lost 30 pounds she said "oh wow.. you were really up there then!!" I never went back... I didn't go to the OBGYN for almost 7 years after that... but I FINALLY found one who was also very heavy. She has lost all her weight and knows how hard it is, she encourages me and tells me what a great job I’m doing!
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I know what you mean about not wanting to go to the doctor. A few years ago, I had a hernia. I lived with it for a long time, until it got big enough that it started getting stuck. After a trip to the emergency room, I went to my PCP (who I had never seen before, but had picked because I was familiar with the office he worked in) to get a referral to a specialist. First thing he wanted me to do was wait until I had lost 100 pounds. Uh, no. I couldn't wait any longer. He asked me when the last time I had any lab work done and I told him it would be awhile. So he set me up a lab appointment, and told me he would give me we could move forward after seeing the results. I think he was thinking he could scare me with the numbers and try to shock me into losing weight. So I did the labs and went back in for the results. His words were "You are surprisingly healthy!" All my numbers were good.
Oh, and I got the surgery.0 -
Sorry to hear all this. Maybe it's because I'm a guy but not even once had I ever had a doctor, male or female, talk me down or berate me over my weight.0
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I have been lucky in that my PCP, and the one I had prior to that, is pretty fat-friendly. I have had some doctors that weren't, though. You'd be surprised that even some doctor's that are fat aren't fat-friendly. I had a a friend that I would term thin. She was pregnant and her OB/GYN told her she was fat! I was floored, as this OB/GYN is fat. I wouldn't expect it from her. I am thankful that my PCP handles my depo-provera and exams, now. I almost went to that OB/GYN to replace the one who refused to give me the depo, as he felt it was causing me to gain weight. I don't know how up-to-date this list is, but I found this on the web. I used to be big into size-acceptance and remembered this list was out there: http://fatfriendlydocs.com/0
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Thank you, I'd seen that link many years ago and lost it. I don't think it's been updated in a very long time, but is still worth checking out.0
