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Black Women Interracial Dating (Warning: Could be Offensive)

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  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    I nailed a chick in a church once.
    Jesus is nailed in every church, and has been for years. You need to try harder to impress us.

    This was pure win good sir/ma'am
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
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    Anyway a couple of weeks later I was in the Kitchen with him and another cook who was white. They were talking while I was just cleaning/unpacking supplies. The white cook said something to the effect that black men only date white women because they can't get a black woman and how come everytime a black man dates a white woman the white woman is not attractive?

    I was mortified. I could tell the black cook was feeling awkward.

    Anyway after that I truthfully would hesitate to date a person outside of my race. Typically I'm not attracted to men of other races but this past experience would make me question a man of a different race motives

    But see, that is a stereotype fulfilled. This one ignorant individual that you encounterd should not define your opinion of an entire race, and therefore, influence your decision to date outside of your race.
  • jesusHchris
    jesusHchris Posts: 1,405 Member
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    I nailed a chick in a church once.
    Jesus is nailed in every church, and has been for years. You need to try harder to impress us.

    Well played.
  • Carlyannabelle
    Carlyannabelle Posts: 621 Member
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    I nailed a chick in a church once.
    Jesus is nailed in every church, and has been for years. You need to try harder to impress us.


    Bwwaahhhhhaaaa!!!! GENIUS!!
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
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    interesting topic.. i tend to agree with the people who say who the hell cares, BUT in practicalities of the situation, there are MANY people who care. i'm a black woman whose almost exclusively dated non black men and mostly euro white dudes. i've been harassed by police, had family members stop talking to, lost white girl "friends" who admitted to others that they were pissed because I had the nerve to pull a more attractive white guy than they could, i've been threatened by black men. so yeah, even though no one else SHOULD care, people do care. anyone who lives in the US and doesn't get that there are some really real race/ethnicity issues still at work are living in something of a bubble. OH, and for the record, i have never lived in the deep south, so all those things i've experienced have happened to me in the so-called liberal north.

    What is the original article? This one?
    http://www.theurbanpolitico.com/2011/05/is-black-church-keeping-black-women.html

    I think the main question is then: why do you think there is this hesitancy to date outside the race, then?
    If it comes from religious/faith reasons, then we can still point the finger at the church.

    Personally, I am cautious about dating random people of non-European origin, but specifically for cultural/religious reasons in fact (people in central Europe - but not Eastern Europe - aren't very religious, and this suits me well).

    it's not really a church thing i dont think. there's also stereotypes about non black men that black women here. the main stereotypes are things like
    - non BMs only want BW for sex and not long term relationships
    - non BM are less manly/have less sexual prowess than BM

    there's also the issue that for the most part in the US, it's pretty culturally ingrained that black women aren't going to be the prettiest girls in the room or the most attractive. if someone believes that, then when a non black man expresses interest in her, she's immediately going to think "there's no way he's interested in me for me, he must just want sex"
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
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    And you were probably cuter too. That would attract jealousy no matter what your race.

    That was sweet. It had just never occurred to me before that how very racist black people can be. I had certainly seen it in white people, and admittedly, I had seen it black people as well, but I didn't register as their behavior being due to racism. Then, I dated a black man, and boy, did it become painfully obvious.

    Fortunately, his family was pretty accepting of me. His grandmother is white too.

    i wanted to respond to this because as a black women i who has seen this happen i might be able to give a bit more insight.

    it's not simply about racism, it's more of a response of a lack of choices for black women who refuse to date non-date men. the truth of the matter is that statistically speaking there ARE less eligible black men for american black women who want to only be with black men. things that will factor in this are :
    - mortality rates (homicide is the biggest cause of death of black men under the age of 25)
    - black men who make it into their 30's have a higher incarceration rate than any other ethnicity
    - gender gap in higher education (33% male vs 45% women). even though there's also a gender gap for white people, it's much higher in blacks

    i've heard black female friends be bitter about whenever they see a black man with a non white woman, but i always remind them that they more than likely wouldnt be so bitter if they expanded their dating pool.

    so next time you get a nasty look, just pass that girl the phone number of some other single, eligible non black guy you know :laugh:
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
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    The white cook said something to the effect that black men only date white women because they can't get a black woman and how come everytime a black man dates a white woman the white woman is not attractive?

    I was mortified. I could tell the black cook was feeling awkward.

    Anyway after that I truthfully would hesitate to date a person outside of my race. Typically I'm not attracted to men of other races but this past experience would make me question a man of a different race motives

    Don't you think your sample size is a bit small? One comment from two cooks in a restaurant, and you've sworn off an entire race of people?

    --P
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
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    Personally, I am cautious about dating random people of non-European origin, but specifically for cultural/religious reasons in fact (people in central Europe - but not Eastern Europe - aren't very religious, and this suits me well).

    Eh? That doesn't make any sense. Which Eastern Europeans, for example, are more religious than Poles?

    --P
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
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    The white cook said something to the effect that black men only date white women because they can't get a black woman and how come everytime a black man dates a white woman the white woman is not attractive?

    I was mortified. I could tell the black cook was feeling awkward.

    Anyway after that I truthfully would hesitate to date a person outside of my race. Typically I'm not attracted to men of other races but this past experience would make me question a man of a different race motives

    Don't you think your sample size is a bit small? One comment from two cooks in a restaurant, and you've sworn off an entire race of people?

    --P

    Maybe, but I'm typically not attracted to men of other races anyway. I might find a black guy cute, but I could not picture myself ever dating a man of another race or falling in love with a man of another race.

    But if someone of another race liked me, and I actually liked them, I would probably try to find out their motive before jumping in with my feelings. I don't want to be some guys' second best because he couldn't get a girl from his race.
  • flimflamfloz
    flimflamfloz Posts: 1,980 Member
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    Personally, I am cautious about dating random people of non-European origin, but specifically for cultural/religious reasons in fact (people in central Europe - but not Eastern Europe - aren't very religious, and this suits me well).
    Eh? That doesn't make any sense. Which Eastern Europeans, for example, are more religious than Poles?
    --P
    Maybe it was phrased weirdly? This is what I meant:
    People in central Europe where I live (and in the North, particularly) aren't very religious, and this suits me well because I know religion isn't going to be an issue in the relationship.But this is not true in Eastern Europe.
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
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    Personally, I am cautious about dating random people of non-European origin, but specifically for cultural/religious reasons in fact (people in central Europe - but not Eastern Europe - aren't very religious, and this suits me well).
    Eh? That doesn't make any sense. Which Eastern Europeans, for example, are more religious than Poles?
    --P
    Maybe it was phrased weirdly? This is what I meant:
    People in central Europe where I live (and in the North, particularly) aren't very religious, and this suits me well because I know religion isn't going to be an issue in the relationship.But this is not true in Eastern Europe.

    Where do you live in Central Europe? Poles are incredibly religious, at least by European standards (not necessarily by American standards). Poland is definitely in Central Europe.

    And you're saying people in Eastern Europe are religious? Please name one country, I'm quite curious!

    --P
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
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    Personally, I am cautious about dating random people of non-European origin, but specifically for cultural/religious reasons in fact (people in central Europe - but not Eastern Europe - aren't very religious, and this suits me well).
    Eh? That doesn't make any sense. Which Eastern Europeans, for example, are more religious than Poles?
    --P
    Maybe it was phrased weirdly? This is what I meant:
    People in central Europe where I live (and in the North, particularly) aren't very religious, and this suits me well because I know religion isn't going to be an issue in the relationship.But this is not true in Eastern Europe.

    Where do you live in Central Europe? Poles are incredibly religious, at least by European standards (not necessarily by American standards). Poland is definitely in Central Europe.

    And you're saying people in Eastern Europe are religious? Please name one country, I'm quite curious!

    --P

    Florian is French. He lives in London, England.

    I understood what he said perfectly. You're just being logistically anal...........lol
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
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    Florian is French. He lives in London, England.

    I understood what he said perfectly. You're just being logistically anal...........lol

    Central Europe is defined as France? How is that possible? Not trying to troll, or be "logistically anal," whatever that means. Really trying to understand how he (and I suppose you?) defines these terms.

    --P
  • flimflamfloz
    flimflamfloz Posts: 1,980 Member
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    Central Europe is defined as France? How is that possible? Not trying to troll, or be "logistically anal," whatever that means. Really trying to understand how he (and I suppose you?) defines these terms.
    Read "Western vs Eastern" (people in western Europe vs Eastern Europe).
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
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    By the way, I wonder if Poland is an interesting analogy for the "Black Church" in America? Poles, under communism, used the church to organise and protest, similar to Black Americans under Jim Crow. It's no coincidence that many Black leaders were ministers, including the greatest: MLK. Lech Walesa was (and still is) an extremely devout Catholic, and the church was key to the rise of his Solidarity Movement. The communists were able to crush practically all of civil society, but they couldn't extinguish the church in Poland. And hence its credibility, still today, as one of the few places that opposed totalitarianism.

    But as someone who has travelled extensively to Poland over the past 20 years, I can say the grip of the church on Poles is slowly loosening. Poland is fast becoming a modern, successful European nation, and hence the lure of religion is fading. Although it's still much more religious than the rest of Europe. It's a slow process, but the trend is clear.

    It will be interesting to see if a similar dynamic will overtake Black Americans. Yes, religion is a cultural thing, which is hard to change. And while communism is dead in Poland, racism lives on in America, although in more subtle forms. So perhaps the church will remain a key pillar of Black society for another generation, at least.

    On the other hand, I do believe we'll see a massive exodus from religion among White Americans. More or less following the European model. This is already happening with the young, if you believe recent polls on religious affiliation. Now approx 20% of Americans consider themselves to be non-religious, and atheism - although still stigmatised in America, sadly - is the fastest growing category. These trends will only accelerate, since few people who were not brought up in a religion choose to become religious later in life. Without indoctrination in youth, it's hard to convince a rational person to embrace religion. So I do believe we've reached a tipping point, much like in Europe after the war.

    What this means for trends in dating I do not know. Probably little or nothing, since I don't really think religion is important in selecting a significant other for the vast majority of Americans, even those that are religious. Although Black Americans, again, may be the exception to the rule for some time in the future.

    --P
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
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    Central Europe is defined as France? How is that possible? Not trying to troll, or be "logistically anal," whatever that means. Really trying to understand how he (and I suppose you?) defines these terms.
    Read "Western vs Eastern" (people in western Europe vs Eastern Europe).

    It's absolutely not clear how you are defining your terms. Is the Czech Republic Western or Eastern Europe? Poland? What about Slovenia? Ukraine is certainly Eastern, I grant you that. Russia is also Eastern. There is an intellectual sloppiness from many in Western Europe about Eastern Europe and Central Europe, who lives there, what they believe, their history, etc.

    The idea that Western Europe is less religious than "Eastern Europe" is ridiculous. Compare Italy with Ukraine, for example. Or Spain with Russia. Ireland with Slovakia. The only religious country I am aware of east of Germany is Poland. That's it.

    --P