May 2014 Mums

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Baby shower

superhelga
superhelga Posts: 68 Member
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Question from an immigrant in America for you of you who already have kids.
Are you having a baby shower? I'm so unfamiliar with the baby shower tradition, but I just got invited to my friends baby shower for her 2nd and am puzzled. I know she has bags, and bags of baby stuff and doesn't really need more. I decided to rather give her something for her 2 year old. Is that weird? (they are very traditional people)

Then I just got worried someone will throw us a baby shower. A little party is wonderful, but this whole thing of baby registry and gifts feels awkward to me. We really don't need another 20 receiving blankets and oncies.
Just wonder what the custom in America is.

Replies

  • stephysd
    stephysd Posts: 2,410 Member
    If they are traditional people, I would maybe split the gift. Give a small gift to their 2 year old as a big sibling present, and then get them a package of diapers. Everyone needs diapers.

    I live in rural Midwest and we only have a baby shower for the first child. But there has been a recent tradition the last two years probably within our area where the Dad-to-Be will have a 'Diaper Keg'. He will get a keg of beer and the guests bring a package of diapers to get into the party. It is a great idea as you get a ton of diapers for just the price of a keg which I think it is like $100 or something. Usually it ends up being a potluck and everyone brings snack type food or salad, and the Mom-to-Be has something made for sandwiches.
  • OtiWanKenobi
    OtiWanKenobi Posts: 340 Member
    Yeah the tradition is to only have a baby shower for your first born. I personally have my choice words for people who have more than one.

    But as Stephsyd mentioned, if you go I would do the split gift or if you got her something for her 2 year old already, I'd just go with that. I'm sorry, but 2 baby showers is not traditional...so an non-traditional gift seems just! :wink:
  • superhelga
    superhelga Posts: 68 Member
    phui. great! thanks, ladies:)
  • blah2989
    blah2989 Posts: 338 Member
    Im from CA, and thats the first time Ive heard of only one baby shower LOL Granted I didnt have a shower with my second, but only because we were SO busy with everything else. I agree with just getting diapers for your friends bby shower and a small present for their other chid. you dont have to do a registry, but it is helpful for some people. I did it with my first, but wouldnt do it again. Im not even doing it for our wedding!
  • hotmomma0612
    hotmomma0612 Posts: 651 Member
    Yeah the tradition is to only have a baby shower for your first born. I personally have my choice words for people who have more than one.

    But as Stephsyd mentioned, if you go I would do the split gift or if you got her something for her 2 year old already, I'd just go with that. I'm sorry, but 2 baby showers is not traditional...so an non-traditional gift seems just! :wink:

    I never had one for my first, as he arrived early and life was a mess. Definitely want one this time around :smile:
  • Skeebee
    Skeebee Posts: 740 Member
    Yeah the tradition is to only have a baby shower for your first born. I personally have my choice words for people who have more than one.

    I'm with you on this one. You have one for the first born. If your first born is still around and healthy for the second, you shouldn't have a second shower. To each their own.
  • blah2989
    blah2989 Posts: 338 Member
    I think it should be up to everyone individually. You dont have to have a baby shower, just to be "showered" in baby gifts, you can also have them just for the games, and an excuse for a family get together, as well as just to spend time with loved ones and get excited about the baby. My take is that people do so many things non traditionally now, that, it really shouldnt matter. I mean say you have a huge age gap, or it may be your second child but your DH's first and he wants the experience. I personally want to do a gender reveal this time around, but I wouldnt be upset if someone threw me a baby shower. Its the thought that counts. You can always as for no gifts or small gifts only. Its not really about the gifts in my opinion as much as it is embracing and celebrating a new life.
  • KimberlyTG2
    KimberlyTG2 Posts: 84 Member
    My niece is having a boy this time. So I helped put on a "Sprinkle" (instead of a Shower) so she could get some boy stuff. The party was smaller then her first, with just close family and friends. It was just a nice get together. If I have a girl, I hope my family will have a shower for me. We have a lot of boy stuff, but nothing for a girl. And really I would be happy getting a lot of diapers and wipes
  • MommyisFit
    MommyisFit Posts: 139 Member
    I personally do not attend baby showers unless it is the first child. I know several people who registered and threw their own showers for 3rd and 4th kids. I do not attend. I usually purchase a gift when the baby is born for the new baby and his/her siblings.

    This is my 3rd child and whatever I don't have I will purchase myself. That is why I purchased all of my major baby items in a neutral shade.
  • kenzietate
    kenzietate Posts: 399 Member
    The tradition is definitely for the first child. The exception I have seen is if there is an extended period of time between kids. Like my mom had me and my brother 2.5 years apart but then didn't have another baby until almost 9 years later. So for her, all of the baby stuff had been given to family and friends and she had nothing left! Her friends decided to throw her a shower to help out.

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